#NODISGUISES with Benjamin Bonetti

Your ability to perceive what you experience is limited by your need to have a small, energy-efficient brain.  Your Reality is warped. Why do I experience things differently to others? Why are the decisions I make different to others? Is there something wrong with me? No – there isn’t anything wrong with you! With a brain smaller than a melon, how do we make sense of everything happening arou...

The overwhelming logistical nightmare can be enough to even the most organised and unfortunately often enough to paralyse those with the best intentions. There is little doubt that there is something special about embarking on an adventure into the unknown and experiencing the world with new eyes. It is universally agreed that feeding the soul with the unknown prompts our interest to push further...

The term "sneaky fuckers" was coined by evolutionary biologist John Maynard Smith to describe subordinate males who take advantage of opportunities to mate with females while dominant males are otherwise occupied, leading to their reproductive success (Smith, 1993). When low-status males have no chance of accessing females via traditional routes such as fighting or signalling their prowess, they m...

Just over 7.6 billion minds will be active within one rotation of a 24hr clock. That’s some serious calorie intake, with the average brain requiring between 400-500 calories per day that is a whole lot of noughts. 7,600,000,000 x 400 = 3.04e+12 While it is natural to assume and believe that we are independent operators, in control of our thoughts, navigating within a conscious decision making spac...

I’ve been guilty of this myself, remaining friends with those for far too long, putting myself in situations that weren’t aligned with whom I am with no real validation for doing so. Just like intimate relationships; the investment in friendships contract, evolve stagnate and in some cases become toxic. So why is it difficult to step away from a friendship, even if it becomes unhealthy, toxic, or...

WHY SUPPRESSING EMOTIONS ISN’T A GOOD IDEA & WHY YOU SHOULD LISTEN. Don’t be so emotional. A statement, I’m sure you’ve heard at least once in your life. But should you ‘not be so emotional’ what happens? Where do they go? Suppressing emotions is an interesting topic and usually a key talking point during the early stages of client sessions and for very good reason. If you don’t face suppresse...

Over 99% of our very existence has been founded on our ability hunt and gather. Today less than 5% of people understand the need to connect with nature and fewer understand the serious health consequences associated with not doing so. It is only since the onset of the agricultural age some 10,000 years ago that we began domesticating our lands. In just a few generations, mostly within that of my g...

As the Government attempts to bring the pandemic to a state of control by ramping up the vaccine rollout, for those already under medical supervision there has been a significant disruption, and in my opinion with worrying consequences… Mental Health Transference An area that is often a secondary consideration, as the focus naturally is targeted towards the patent, are the children of those under...

FEEL LIKE YOU ARE AN IMPOSTER? YOU ARE PROBABLY RIGHT. It hits you without any reason… you don’t belong, you are living a lie and the world around you has been founded on the failings of others, everything you do isn’t good enough. You are an imposter within your own mind. Impostor syndrome refers to an internal experience of believing that you fail to make the grade in comparison to others, your...

Covid is by far the most searched keyword on the Internet, and something that will be for a long time. It is important therefore to ensure that your psychological toolbox is packed ready and able to deploy at a moments notice… PPPPPP. Prior Preparation Prevents Piss Poor Performance. When you notice your state tipping to a place where you’d rather not be, you’ll be equipped to do something about i...

It sounds ridiculous and I’m almost embarrassed to admit that travel at the moment is something that I think about at least ten times per day. Racing the Engadin Ski Marathon in March specifically (now cancelled for the second year due to covid-19). With the World on its knees, people struggling to feed their children, immigrants attempting to cross the channel to find a better life and all I can...

STOP USING FILTERS, RENTING SUPER CARS OR BUYING FAKE WATCHES. I get asked a lot about confidence and how we can develop more of it, although much of the advice is based on personal and specific questioning… for most, a few hours of reflection can bring about substantial shifts. I’m an advocate for all things ‘self’ and for most parts confidence-starts-and-ends in how you communicate within. Self-...

There’s little argument that in order to achieve your desired outcome in life you need discipline, tenacity, courage, and a strong defined vision of the future. You’ll need years of smart working, rather than hard work…. you also have to be motivated to get up in the morning and do the most basic of tasks… The bigger picture isn’t always the failing point. Start as you mean to go on… make your bed...

I’m not a Relationship Expert by any means, but I do know what doesn’t work within my model of the World. I was subject to an abusive marriage by contrast to the relationship I am in right now – more on this in later posts. Knowing something to be right, you could assume the opposite to be wrong… but that isn’t the case. Black isn’t an opposite to white, forward to backwards, good to bad, or right...

There have been endless predictions about mental health and the consequences of the COVID-19 pandemic. The anticipated need to develop new therapy services for ‘PTSD’ post-traumatic stress disorder, for suicide prevention and for prolonged grief, have been the topic for much in the media. But there is something missing and an area that is the talking point of at least one consultation per week in...

You would think you are a rational human being right! That you’re able to assess new information in a completely logical way; you’ve made it this far in life. But the opposite is true; the majority of your success in making it to this point is purely down to the ancient purpose of life – to survive (not something I’m going to cover here). Don’t worry you are not alone we are all the same, despite...

I’m sharing this video with you, as it is a stark reminder for those who at some point in their life have been fitter than they are right now. The same route was taken, with weight, slightly better apparel and yet the outcome ‘pain’ was vastly different. WHY? I am not as fit as I once was, and the pain is a good reminder that I need to do something about it…. but only if I listen! Most people stru...

WHY YOU SHOULD GROW UP AND ACT YOUR EXPERIENCES. Act your age! I’ve been stuck with that statement for years, not really understanding how to act differently between 37 and 38. When you start to chunk down the years there is a clear difference in how we act, not by the age but as a result of the experiences, learning and wisdom from those additional years under our belt. For a long time I thought...

Do you have issues trusting other people? Are you positive that the only one you can count on is yourself? You are probably right if you look hard enough! Some people argue that you have to trust other people in order to live a happy, fulfilling life. While that may be true to a certain extent because you can’t shut everyone out, you can’t overlook the importance of trusting yourself first and for...

MANAGE YOUR STRESS USING THE GREAT OUTDOORS. NO MORE EXCUSES. You don’t need to be a brain surgeon to know that that exercise does your body some favours, but for many they are too busy and stressed to consider it a priority. FITNESS / MINDFUL WELLBEING / NUTRITION Virtually any form of exercise from yoga to a weekend hike can act as a stress reliever. You don’t need to be an athlete or not out of...

2020 I’m sure is a year that most of us will want to put behind, and for most for more than one reason, but it has offered a reset and some essential learning’s that otherwise we may have missed and or failed to address. I’ve been racing in one discipline or another for over 20 years, from my early Cross-Country running at 20 something to my more recent adventures in night alpine cross-country ski...

Intention is our ability to redirect a (personalised) vision of the future instead of just letting our thoughts and ideals flow down the path of least resistance.  It’s something that for most they can relate to when they take themselves back to childhood, but here I want you to remain within the adult mind. Intentional manipulation. It is unique to our species and a tool that I actually real...

UNDERSTAND THE IMPORTANCE AND THE STRENGTH OF THE WORDS YOU USE. If words affect the mind in different ways, are some of the words that you use more persuasive than others? If you train the mind to use certain words rather than others would you be more productive? More successful? Able to navigate the world with greater ease? Our Brain Is Listening To The Words We Use. #words #terminology #speech...

“I’m tired, I didn’t sleep very well, My mind was busy, I couldn’t shut off, I need a holiday’ These are all statements that you would have heard me repeat over the last 20 years and universally a ‘norm’ for most people I’m sure. There is no doubt that adulthood is exhausting. With the responsibilities of work, family, friendships and more, we are expending a lot of energy and are even limiting th...

As an athlete, competing in marathons, 140-mile ironman triathlons in 24 degree heat and night ski marathons at minus 14, you could say that I perversely enjoy the mind-body conflict and challenge that pushes your mind to the point of emotional disconnection. The discomfort of running a marathon in the blistering heat having completed 2.4 mile swim and 120 mile ride across 4000ft of climbs require...