Divorce Happens

What questions should you actually ask at your first divorce attorney consultation? In this solo episode of Divorce Happens, Olivia answers a listener letter from someone terrified she'll sit through her first consult, nod along, and walk out without asking a single thing that mattered — then spend three days replaying everything she wishes she'd said. If that fear sounds familiar, you're not fail...

What do you do in the first 24 hours after your spouse says they're leaving? In this solo "Hey Olivia" episode of Divorce Happens, Olivia Howell answers a letter from a woman who was standing at the stove making dinner when her husband walked in, told her he wants "a new life," and said she could keep the kids and the house. She hasn't cried yet. She thinks she's in shock. And she just needs someo...

How do you heal from a divorce when there's no villain — when you both still love each other and simply grew apart? In this solo "Hey Olivia" episode of Divorce Happens, Olivia Howell answers a letter from a listener ending a marriage with no betrayal, no blowup, and real care still between them. They share a child, they can still show up for each other, and she wants to know: how do you stay conn...

Nobody warns you that the divorce itself might be the easy part. For Courtney Gilmartin, a New Jersey mom who started her divorce journey nearly a decade ago, the 13-month dissolution of her marriage was just the opening chapter of a much longer, harder story — one that wound through post-judgment litigation, forensic custody evaluations, parenting coordinators, and years of fighting a family cour...

How do you answer your kids' questions about divorce when you're barely holding yourself together? In this solo "Hey Olivia" episode of Divorce Happens, Olivia Howell answers a letter from a parent whose kids seemed "fine" when they first heard about the divorce — and are now flooding her with questions. Where will I sleep? Will I still see my friends? Do you still love each other? Is it my fault?...

How do you tell your kids you're getting divorced when your co-parent wants to blame you for it? In this solo "Hey Olivia" episode of Divorce Happens, Olivia Howell answers a letter from a mom whose ex plans to tell their five- and seven-year-old that Mommy broke up the family — and who yells every time she tries to talk about doing it differently. If you're terrified of how the other parent might...

What happens when you get married at 22, divorced by 27, and have to figure out who you actually are for the very first time — as a fully formed adult? That’s the question at the heart of this week’s episode of Divorce Happens, and it’s one that Sarah Vacchiano has spent the last decade not just living, but writing. Sarah is a Los Angeles-based entertainment lawyer, a first-time author, and the mo...

Nobody warns you, when you're in the thick of a divorce, that the financial fallout doesn't end with the settlement. There are tuition bills on the horizon, FAFSA forms with your ex's name on them, and a whole new layer of negotiation you never saw coming. In this episode of Divorce Happens, host Olivia Howell sits down with Vicki Vollweiler — founder of College Financial Prep , divorced mom, and...

She was lying on the ground in Thailand, her husband having just shoved her in public, not knowing if her neck was broken, her arm was broken — knowing only that her heart was. In that moment, journalist, traveler, and diver Lisa Niver could not have imagined that the next chapter of her life would take her skydiving, mountain biking down a ski run in Lake Tahoe, and scuba diving with bull sharks...

There is a moment — quiet, uncomfortable, impossible to unhear — when you realize the marriage you’re in isn’t the marriage you thought you were building. For D’Ionna Washington , that moment came just one year into her first marriage. Instead of suppressing it, she eventually did what so few women feel permitted to do: she left. And then she wrote the book about it. In this candid, fire-lit conve...

What if the end of your marriage deserved a party? Not in spite of how hard it was — but because of it. In this joyful, irreverent, and unexpectedly moving solo episode of Divorce Happens, host Olivia Howell makes the full-throated, unapologetic case for divorce parties — and why throwing one might be one of the most psychologically meaningful things you can do for yourself after divorce. This is...

If you’ve ever sat with the thought of leaving an emotionally abusive relationship and felt, instead of relief, a wave of guilt — this episode is for you. Not the guilt of someone who is doing something wrong. The guilt of someone who has been so thoroughly conditioned to put themselves last that the simple act of imagining their own freedom feels like a betrayal. In this deeply compassionate and...

There is a particular kind of loneliness that lives inside a marriage that has gone quiet — where you’ve been having the conversation about separating entirely in your own head for weeks or months, but haven’t said a single word of it out loud. Not because you don’t know what you feel. But because you genuinely don’t know how to start — especially when real communication between you and your spous...

There is a question that lives in the bodies of thousands of people right now — not just in their minds, but in the tightness of their chests and the sleepless hours of 3 a.m. It’s not “should I get divorced.” It’s the harder, more specific thing: how do I actually say the words? In this intimate solo episode of Divorce Happens, host Olivia Howell steps into that question with the steady, grounded...

There’s a question that sits quietly in the minds of thousands of people every single day — and this week, one woman had the courage to send it to Olivia’s Instagram DMs: “How do I push past the fear and file against my narcissistic ex? We have a two-year-old.” In this intimate solo episode of Divorce Happens, host Olivia Howell speaks directly to that listener — and to every person navigating the...

What if divorce didn't have to destroy your family — what if it could actually make it better? That's the radical, deeply human premise at the heart of this week's episode of Divorce Happens, and it's brought to life by someone who's lived it, studied it, and built an entire career helping others do it well. Karen McNenny is a 15-year divorce survivor, certified divorce coach, co-parent specialist...

There's an emotion that lives in a quiet corner of a lot of divorced women — one they haven't said out loud to their therapist, their best friend, or maybe even themselves. And in this solo episode of Divorce Happens, Olivia is naming it directly: relief. Relief after divorce — or even during it — is one of the most common and least talked-about emotional experiences of divorce recovery. The exhal...

If you're a divorced mom, chances are you're carrying a fear that doesn't have a name but feels like this: Am I ruining my kids? In this solo episode of Divorce Happens, Olivia gets honest about one of the most universal — and most exhausting — emotional experiences of divorce recovery: mom guilt. Not the logistical kind, but the deep kind. The one that whispers at 2am that your kids are going to...

Most people walking into a divorce do the same thing: they call a lawyer. It feels like the obvious first move — the responsible one. But according to Jill Kaufman , a licensed therapist, certified divorce coach, certified mediator, and parent educator with decades of experience, hiring an attorney first is one of the most common — and costly — mistakes divorcing people make. Jill is also the foun...

If the first thing you did when your marriage started falling apart was Google the most aggressive divorce attorney in town, you are not alone — and you are not wrong for it. But what if there was a smarter, calmer, more strategic way to get through one of the hardest chapters of your life? In this episode of Divorce Happens, host Olivia Howell sits down with Melissa Murphy Pavone, a Certified Fin...

There is a quiet pressure that follows divorce like a shadow — the pressure to be fine. To be strong. To show everyone, and maybe especially yourself, that you are thriving and not broken and absolutely, definitely over it. In this intimate and deeply moving solo episode of Divorce Happens, host Olivia Howell sits with that pressure and names it for what it is: a lie that is costing women their he...

Nobody warns you about this part. The divorce attorneys explain the paperwork. The therapists help you process the grief of your marriage. Your family tells you it’s going to be okay. But almost no one prepares you for the moment you realize that some of the friendships you built your entire social world around — the dinner couples, the group text, the women who knew everything about your life — h...

There is a version of this story that gets told over and over again in our culture — the one where leaving a marriage is the failure, and staying is the strength. Where the person who files the papers is the one who gave up. Where divorce is a tragedy, and the one who initiates it is somehow the villain. In this deeply personal solo episode of Divorce Happens, host Olivia Howell takes that narrati...

Spring has a way of being quietly cruel when you're in the middle of a divorce. The world turns bright and blooming and annoyingly beautiful, and you're still just trying to get through the week — maybe the day, maybe the hour. The flowers don't know your timeline. The Instagram farmers market hauls don't know you're rebuilding from the ground up. And somewhere in that gap between what the season...

Nobody warns you that your first Mother's Day after divorce might be the hardest Sunday of your year. You might have your kids — and still feel completely alone. You might be kid-free for the holiday and have absolutely no idea what to do with yourself. You might scroll through social media, watch the flower deliveries and the brunches and the gratitude posts, and feel something you can't quite na...