CoParentSpace: Co-Parenting & Divorce Support

For an autistic child, predictability isn't a preference; it's a need that runs close to the core of how they experience safety in the world. And a two-home arrangement is, by its nature, an arrangement built around a recurring change of environment. That's the central challenge of parenting an autistic child across two homes, and it needs to be understood clearly rather than glosse...

Your child comes home and tells you they watched four hours of YouTube at the second home over the weekend. Or that they got a new game on the tablet your co-parent gave them. Or that they were allowed to play Roblox until eleven on a Saturday night. Or that the family has a rule of one episode after dinner, except the family is just one of your child's families, and at yours the rule is no e...

Saturday morning. The kitchen. Your eight-year-old is at the counter helping you make pancakes. They've been chatty for the last few minutes. Then, mid-stir, in a voice that's bright in a way that doesn't quite match the conversation: do you remember when we used to all have pancakes together on Saturday mornings, when we lived in the old house? That was the best. In this episode of...

Your child used to be even-tempered, and now there's a short fuse where the easy kid used to be. Snapping over small things. Slamming doors. Furious at a sibling, at you, at a sock that won't go on right. The anger seems to come from nowhere and lands on everything, and you're left wondering where your child went and who this stormy version is. In this episode of CoParentSpace we ge...

The school calendar is stuck to the fridge with a magnet, and on it, circled in marker, are the dates that actually matter. The two weeks in the December break. The month in summer. The week in the spring term. For a long-distance family, these aren't just holidays. They're the spine of the year, the blocks of real, physical, unhurried time that the rest of the year is built around. In t...

Monday evening. Six forty-eight. Your nine-year-old is at the kitchen table, dragging penne through a small puddle of olive oil and parmesan. They've been chatty since they got back from their mama's an hour ago. School. The new book they're reading. The kid in their class who's apparently a complete legend now for reasons you don't fully understand. In this episode of CoP...

The message arrives at 6.40 in the morning. You haven't had coffee yet. You're sitting on the edge of your bed, phone in hand, reading what your Co-Parent has just sent. In this episode of CoParentSpace we get practical about when your child gets sick at your Co-Parent's — what actually helps for separated and divorced parents, and why — grounded in attachment science and clinical r...

It's Wednesday, 6.18pm. You're in the car park outside the mediator's office. You've been here for twelve minutes. You came early because you didn't know what the traffic would be, and now you have time you didn't know what to do with. In this episode of CoParentSpace we get practical about the first session: what to expect — what actually helps for separated and divo...

Wednesday, 6.15pm. You've just got home from work. Your child mentioned, in passing, that they didn't have the right kit for tomorrow's school activity. The kit is at your Co-Parent's house. The activity is at 9am. The kit needs to be at school by 8.30. Your Co-Parent does the morning handover. You're not seeing your child until Friday. In this episode of CoParentSpace we...

Saturday morning. The supermarket. Your child puts a packet of biscuits in the trolley. You don't think about it. At the checkout, the bill comes to slightly more than usual. You pay. You walk to the car. In this episode of CoParentSpace we get practical about the big expenses vs the small ones — what actually helps for separated and divorced parents, and why — grounded in attachment science...

Sunday evening. Your eleven-year-old is packing his school bag. The PE kit, the reading book, the maths workbook. The two-week-old habit of double-checking everything because some weeks he hasn't seen the contents of his backpack since Tuesday. This is the third week of the new schedule. Week on, week off. He goes to his Co-Parent's tomorrow morning. He won't be back until next Sund...

Wednesday morning. The school bag is packed. The shoes are by the door. Your six-year-old is at the kitchen table, half a piece of toast on his plate, not eating. He hasn't looked at you since he came downstairs. You finally ask him what's wrong. He says it without raising his eyes. Did you and Mama break up because I was being bad? In this episode of CoParentSpace we get practical about...

The text comes through Wednesday evening. In this episode of CoParentSpace we get practical about letting your teenager negotiate their own time — what actually helps for separated and divorced parents, and why — grounded in attachment science and clinical research. What we cover: • What negotiating actually is • When to negotiate, when not to • The principle, the detail • The moves • The Co-Paren...

Tuesday, 7:42am. You're packing the breakfast bowls when your nine-year-old, just out of the shower, freezes in the hallway. In this episode of CoParentSpace we get practical about the 'I forgot my thing' moment — what actually helps for separated and divorced parents, and why — grounded in attachment science and clinical research. What we cover: • The first sixty seconds • The syst...

It's the third evening of your week. You've made dinner, run the bath, brought out the pyjamas, started the bedtime routine. You're tired in the specific way that two-home weeks make you tired. You are doing everything right. In this episode of CoParentSpace we get practical about the 'I want my mummy' / 'I want my daddy' cry — what actually helps for separated a...

In this episode of CoParentSpace we get practical about same routine, two homes: How aligned should bedtimes really be? — what actually helps for separated and divorced parents, and why — grounded in attachment science and clinical research. What we cover: • What parents are actually asking • Three things that need to be aligned • Three things that don't need to be aligned • When alignment ma...

Your child's birthday is coming, and the simple childhood thing it used to be has become a logistics question with feelings attached. One party or two? At whose home? Do both parents come to the same one, and can you stand to be in the same room? Who invites the friends, who buys the cake, who pays? And underneath all of it, the wish that your child's birthday could just be your child&ap...

The message comes through, or the call doesn't. The weekend the children were supposed to spend with their Co-Parent isn't happening. Something came up, or nothing was said at all, and now you're standing in your kitchen with a packed overnight bag by the door and a child who's about to ask where they're going. You have a few minutes to decide what to say and how to handle...

A child with ADHD does best with structure, routine, and predictability. Those are exactly the things a two-home arrangement makes harder to deliver. That tension is the heart of parenting a child with ADHD across two homes, and it's worth naming plainly at the start, because understanding the tension is the first step to managing it. In this episode of CoParentSpace we get practical about aD...

Sunday, five in the afternoon. Your child has just been dropped back. They smell like sunscreen and ice cream. They've watched five hours of YouTube. They haven't brushed their teeth since Friday morning. They're wired and a bit fragile, the way children are after too much sugar and not enough sleep, and you can already see how the next forty-eight hours are going to go. Tantrum at...

A Wednesday. Nothing in particular has happened. Your nine-year-old is just sad. They've been sad since they got up. They had breakfast quietly. They didn't want to talk in the car. At school they were apparently fine, but their teacher mentioned in passing at pickup that K seemed a bit subdued today. Now they're on the sofa with the dog and a book they're not reading. Their fa...

Sunday evening. Six fifty-one. The bath water is draining. Your seven-year-old has just thrown the rubber duck against the wall hard enough that you heard the bounce from the kitchen. They're now sitting on the bath mat with a towel half on and the wet hair plastered down, crying in a way that doesn't have any words in it. In this episode of CoParentSpace we get practical about the Sunda...

Saturday morning. Eleven oh-six. You're standing in front of your wardrobe with two shirts on hangers in your hands. The blue one or the grey one. The introduction is at three. A park you've been to a hundred times with your eight-year-old. Your new partner is meeting you there with the dog they sometimes bring on walks. In this episode of CoParentSpace we get practical about when and ho...

The call has been going for three minutes. Your five-year-old is already looking off-screen at something in the room. You ask another question. They answer in one word. You ask another. They wander off entirely and the phone is now showing the ceiling. On the other end, you're left talking to a light fixture, wondering what you did wrong. In this episode of CoParentSpace we get practical abou...

It's seven on a Sunday evening. Your child has been on a five-day course of antibiotics since Wednesday. They've had four doses. Three more to go: tonight's, tomorrow morning's, tomorrow evening's. Tomorrow morning they switch to your Co-Parent's home. In this episode of CoParentSpace we get practical about medication: Doses, schedules, and the night-time switch — wha...