Beautifully Complex

Gender diversity is more common among neurodiverse kids and teens, especially those on the autism spectrum. People who do not identify with the sex they were assigned at birth are three to six times as likely to have autism as people who don’t question their gender assignment, according to the latest studies on the subject. Neurodivergent kids have trouble fitting in and they often explore differe...

We’re working on our next free online Parenting ADHD & Autism Summit — Decoding Behavior Summit February 11-13, 2022. In interviewing all these experts on behavior, parenting, ADHD, autism, and anxiety we have had our own lightbulb moments.  In this episode of the podcast, we’re sharing some of what these experts will be offering during the Decoding Behavior Summit and letting you know how you...

Many individuals with ADHD struggle with anxiety as well, wether it be an additional condition or the result of the challenges that come with ADHD. Anxiety is often misunderstood by parents and other adults in a child’s life, and can feel like it should be easily rationalized away. But, those with anxiety know no amount of rationalizing can just “turn off” an anxiety attack. In this episode of the...

Your parenting mindset is the #1 most important aspect of parenting kids with ADHD, autism, or other neurobehavioral disorders. Being the best parent you can be for your neurodiverse kid is 90 percent about changing yourself — it’s never about changing your kid.  This episode of the Parenting ADHD Podcast is part of our Behavior Revolution series. Penny and Sarah outline the perspective you need t...

Ari Sokolov grew up with ADHD, but she didn’t let her struggles in school define her. Instead, she found ways to make her strengths of creativity and problem-solving work for her. And everything changed when she accidentally walked into a computer science class in middle school and discovered coding. Coding is an outlet for her ADHD creativity and hyperfocus and she grew so passionate about it tha...

Self-care is a necessity, not a luxury. Even more so for parents raising neurodiverse kids, like those with ADHD or autism. And yet, self-care is the first thing we sacrifice as parents, thinking we are doing better by our kids and our families in doing so. The reality is, the less we care for ourselves, the less we have to give to others. Sacrificing your self-care is actually making you less abl...

Creative parenting not only helps you create moments of magic, but it also fosters trust and independence, emotional expression, out-of-the-box thinking, happiness through connection, and the ability to let go of perfection. Creative parenting can cut through the stress, anxiety, and struggle to bring more light and joy to your child, yourself, and your family, as well. In this episode of the Pare...

By college age, 66-85 percent of all people have been impacted by trauma. And marginalized populations — including those with disabilities like ADHD, autism, and anxiety — are much more likely to experience trauma, many consistently and frequently. We can’t prevent all trauma, but we can affect how our kids (and ourselves) cope with it and heal it. In this episode of the Parenting ADHD Podcast, Dr...

Kids with special needs get in trouble at school — both disciplinary action and involvement of law enforcement — far more than neurotypical students. Kids with ADHD, anxiety, learning disabilities, and autism are suspended far more than their peers. And that’s not ok. It’s downright scary for parents of kids with behavioral issues when they know the behaviors are a manifestation of the disability...

The common advice from many clinicians for parenting kids with ADHD is to start a behavior chart and reward system to create external motivation. The problem is that these charts and systems often add more work for overwhelmed parents and kids, and often don’t produce results. And in our schools and classrooms, they end up instilling shame, blame, and fear, which is actually harming our children....

We only encourage play up to age five in our culture, but play should be lifelong, because curiosity, learning, and growth should be lifelong. We need to trust our kids (and ourselves) to follow individual interests and passions to create learning and fulfillment. In this episode of the Parenting ADHD Podcast, I’m talking with play enabler and parent coach, Sivanne Lieber, about using play to help...

When we choose to view ADHD as a difference, we show our kids that they’re not broken and help them harness their strengths. As ADHD Coach, Tamara Rosier, Ph. D., tells us in this episode, people with ADHD eventually grow into their brains. It’s our job as parents to help them navigate big emotions and develop strategies to get things done despite having an ADHD brain. Tamara provides strategies f...

Does your child avoid or flat-out refuse to go to school sometimes? School avoidance and refusal is the most stressful and upsetting thing I’ve gone through as a parent. The law says my kid has to attend school but my kid is so stressed and so pained in that environment that he couldn’t physically force himself to go many days, no matter the consequences. Listen in as I share our 9-year journey wi...

Our culture seems to dictate that parents should have control over their kids. We should command them and they should comply. But this authoritarian parent-child relationship is harmful and not at all helpful. It sets us up to see our kids as our enemies — a mindset that is enormously damaging and actually makes our kids’ behavior worse. In this episode of the Parenting ADHD Podcast, I’ll outline...

Yelling at someone who is causing you anguish or frustration is totally natural. We are wired to respond in kind to keep ourselves safe. However, yelling at our kids, no matter what the situation, is never helpful. Ok, if they’re running out into traffic, yelling is warranted, I’ll give you that. But outside of safety situations, yelling is counterproductive. Listen in to this episode of the Paren...

Parents get to choose how they view their child’s behavior. You can decide that they are behaving poorly or have “bad” qualities, like laziness. Or, you can take into account your child’s brain and biology and use it to guide how you view challenging behavior. It really is your choice to make. In this first episode of the Behavior Revolution series on the Parenting ADHD Podcast, Sarah and I share...

A lack of motivation isn’t a character flaw. There’s always a reason why someone isn’t on task or meeting expectations, and it’s virtually never that they just don’t care. When it feels like your child is unmotivated, ask yourself, “What’s getting in the way?” In this episode of the parenting ADHD Podcast, Dr. Norrine Russell shares how to take a deep dive into a seeming lack of motivation to dete...

When kids are struggling in school, it’s not just about academics — social connectedness and mental and emotional health play a key role in success at school too. Our current tick-the-box, high-stakes educational culture doesn’t work for our kids, especially kids with ADHD and/or autism. In this episode of the Parenting ADHD Podcast, join me as I talk with Jeannine Jannot, Ph. D., author of “The D...

Many students with ADHD are underachievers or gifted underachievers. They are bright but don’t do well in school. Alex Hargrove JD — author of "Reversing Underachievement: A Practical Guide for Parents of Underachieving Gifted Children," is one of those students. He graduated high school with a 2.2 GPA and a real disinterest in school and learning. Yet, he went on to get a law degree and co-found...

What I most wanted to know when my son was little was what it was like to have ADHD. I wanted to know his experience so I could be as helpful as possible. I asked as many ADHD adults as I could what would be helpful for my son. Lia McCabe is sharing these same insights as an adult who grew up with undiagnosed ADHD in this episode of the Parenting ADHD Podcast. She shares her story with you to help...

Many parents feel like their kids simply won’t listen to them. And when you have a kid with ADHD (or autism), it feels like they won’t listen most of the time, but you can change that. In this episode of the Parenting ADHD Podcast, I’m talking with Julie King, co-author of the newest book in the famed “How to Talk” parenting series, How to Talk When Kids Won’t Listen. Join us to learn the three ba...

No one disputes that raising kids with ADHD is more challenging. There’s a definitive struggle that can often overwhelm parents and family. But, that doesn’t mean your parenting life and family journey has to be devoid of joy. Quite the opposite! Join me and the ladies of The Childhood Collective — Lori Long, Mallory Yee, and Katie Severson — as we discuss the process necessary for parenting with...

Very often people receive something we say differently than we intended them to. This is even more true for kids with neurodifferences like ADHD and autism. Kids who struggle with social skills, emotional awareness, a sensitized stress response, and an inflated sensitivity to rejection and criticism. Our parenting comes from the best of intentions and love, but it’s often received much differently...

ADHD creates many hurdles to academic success, most often in the way of lagging executive functioning skills. It takes an ADHD-informed caregiver, coach, or tutor to truly help a student with learning challenges that stem from ADHD. And it’s also important to know when to keep challenging and when a student needs the pressure released. In this episode of the Parenting ADHD Podcast, I’m talking wit...

We don’t want to change who our kids are, but we do want them to feel empowered to function well in our neurotypical world so they can build a fulfilling life for themselves. And the only way to do that is to see behavior as communication, understand the biology that triggers challenging behavior, and implement a systematic approach that uses those foundations as it’s core. In this episode of the...