Return to Heart

What if resilience isn't about becoming strong enough to handle everything on your own? We often think of resilience as toughness — the ability to push through, overcome adversity, and keep going no matter what. But what if genuine resilience has less to do with independence and more to do with connection? In this episode of Return to Heart, we explore how relationships, community, and support sha...

What happens when the body you live in becomes something you're ashamed of? In this episode of Return to Heart, Jeff Schulte and Phil Herndon discover that they carried remarkably similar wounds from opposite sides of body shame. Jeff grew up believing he was too skinny. Phil grew up ashamed of being overweight. Different bodies—but underneath, a remarkably similar message: something is wrong with...

Work can be meaningful, productive, and deeply fulfilling. But what happens when work becomes the place where you find your identity, escape difficult relationships, or prove that you are worthy of being loved? In this episode of Return to Heart, Jeff Schulte and Phil Herndon explore the emotional roots of workaholism and performance addiction. They discuss how achievement can provide powerful fee...

What if taking care of yourself isn't selfish—but necessary? In this episode of Return to Heart, Jeff Schulte and Phil Herndon continue their conversation about what it means to be needy humans who are learning to live honestly before God and with one another. They explore the difference between genuine self-care and escape, why our attempts to rest can sometimes become ways of numbing ourselves,...

What does Jesus actually mean when He says to us “deny yourself”? For many Christians, that phrase can quietly become something much harsher: My needs don't matter. Wanting to flourish is selfish. Taking care of myself is ungodly. Everyone else should always come first. Jeff Schulte and Phil Herndon unpack what “deny yourself” actually means—and why denying your ego may be very different from deny...

Have you ever wondered why certain people stay with you—even long after they're gone? Or why a simple object can instantly bring back powerful memories and emotions? In Part 2 of this conversation, Jeff Schulte and Phil Herndon build on last episode's discussion about sentimental objects by exploring the deeper truth behind them: it's never really about the object—it's about the relationships they...

Why is it so hard to throw certain things away? Sometimes it isn't about the object at all—it's about the relationship it represents. In Episode 25 of Return to Heart, Jeff Schulte and Phil Herndon explore why keepsakes, heirlooms, gifts, and even a weighted vest can carry profound emotional meaning. They unpack the psychology of attachment, grief, memory, and connection while showing how ordinary...

Sex addiction is rarely just about sex. In this conversation, Phil and Jeff are joined by Greg Oliver, co-founder of Awaken Recovery, to unpack what addiction really is, why pornography is more powerful than many people realize, and why lasting healing never comes through willpower alone. They explore the neuroscience of addiction, the role of shame, the importance of emotions, why intimacy is so...

What happens when the person you trust most becomes the source of your deepest pain? In Episode 23 of Return to Heart, Phil sits down with Stacey Oliver of Awaken Recovery to discuss betrayal trauma, recovery after sexual addiction, attachment wounds, codependency, and the long road toward healing. Drawing from her own story, Stacey shares what it felt like to discover hidden betrayal, why so many...

Sexual addiction impacts far more than the person struggling—it affects marriages, families, trust, and emotional health. In Episode 22 of Return to Heart, Greg and Stacey Oliver share their deeply personal story of addiction, disclosure, betrayal, recovery, and redemption. Their honest conversation offers practical hope for couples facing difficult realities and reminds listeners that healing is...

What if the single most important thing you can do for your children isn't a parenting strategy? In this episode of the Return to Heart Podcast, Jeff and Phil explore a powerful truth: the best parenting doesn't start with your children — it starts with your own heart. Key Takeaways: • Why emotional presence matters more than parenting techniques • How unresolved wounds can shape the way we parent...

Many of us grow up in environments that feel chaotic, unpredictable, or emotionally unsafe. Without realizing it, we create systems, rituals, and coping strategies just to survive. In this episode of the Return to Heart Podcast, Jeff and Phil explore how the human brain is wired for safety, structure, and connection—and how trauma can push us into cycles of chaos, rigidity, and compulsive coping s...

Why is it so difficult to say what we really need? In this episode of the Return to Heart Podcast, Jeff and Phil explore one of the most profound questions Jesus asks in the New Testament: “What do you want me to do for you?” Through the story of Blind Bartimaeus, they unpack how vulnerability, fear, and faith intersect in moments of emotional and relational healing. Many of us struggle to name ou...

Why do we bounce between anxiety and emotional shutdown,? In this episode, Jeff and Phil explore the concept of the “window of tolerance”—the emotional space where we can stay present, relational, and resilient even when life is hard. In this episode you’ll learn: • Why we cycle between anxiety and depression • How resentment, rage, and self-pity can reveal deeper emotions • Why telling your story...

In this episode of the Return to Heart podcast, Jeff and Phil explore the psychological concept of the Window of Tolerance and how trauma, anxiety, and depression can shape our ability to stay emotionally present. Along the way, they reflect on how God designed us as integrated beings - body, mind, and spirit - and why learning to pay attention to our bodies plays a key role in emotional and relat...

In today’s episode, we dive into one of the most important and least-discussed topics in Christian discipleship: sexual integrity - what it means, why it matters, and how men and women can move toward wholeness in an area where many people quietly struggle. Key takeaways: • Why sexual integrity is about wholeness, not perfection • The cultural forces shaping how we think about sexuality • The conn...

What happens when faith, addiction, and honesty collide? In this episode of the Return to Heart Podcast, we explore the deep and often misunderstood relationship between the 12 Steps, the Church, and true discipleship. What begins with judgment turns into gratitude, humility, and transformation. This conversation unpacks how the 12 Steps became a life jacket, not a replacement for faith—but a path...

Addiction doesn’t just affect the person acting out—it impacts everyone connected to them. In this episode of Return to Heart, the conversation turns toward the often-overlooked reality of spouses, children, parents, and loved ones living alongside addiction. Through personal stories, clinical insight, and family systems theory, the hosts explore what it’s like to be on the other side of compulsiv...

What if your feelings were never the enemy of your faith? In this episode of Return to Heart , we explore how neuroscience, Scripture, and lived human experience all point to the same truth: God designed us to feel first, not last . From John Calvin to modern brain science, from attachment theory to Scripture, this conversation reveals how healing, transformation, and spiritual maturity happen thr...

What if the way many of us were taught to grow spiritually actually cost us intimacy with God? In this episode of Return To Heart , Jeff and Phil explore a story that shaped decades of faith, discipleship, and emotional disconnection—beginning in a Yale dorm room in 1980 and unfolding into a powerful conversation about facts, feelings, faith, and how God actually designed us. Through vivid metapho...

Most of us have spent a lifetime becoming right-leg dominant — relying on intellect, morality, and sheer willpower to survive life. But, the parts of us designed for intimacy, connection, and vulnerability? Those got left behind. In this episode of Return to Heart , we unpack one of the most transformative metaphors we’ve ever used: 👉 The right leg and the left leg. Drawing from tens of thousands...

Alignment isn’t about perfection — it’s about returning home to who God made us to be. In this episode of Return to Heart, we explore the final stage of the transformational process: alignment—stepping out of hiding, confronting shame, receiving acceptance, and rediscovering our God-given identity. Through honest storytelling, real-time vulnerability, and examples from Scripture—including the Prod...

Welcome back to the Transformational Process series. In this episode, we explore one of the most healing and redemptive steps in the journey of spiritual and emotional recovery: Acceptance. Following last week’s conversation on Admission , this episode dives into why acceptance is essential for wholeness, how it restores connection, and why we cannot grow without relationships that meet us with “M...

In this raw and honest episode, the Tin Man team — Jeff, Todd, and Phil — explore the power of admission: the moment when life’s pain and exhaustion become too heavy to carry, and we finally come to ourselves. Drawing from the story of the Prodigal Son in Luke 15, they discuss why our lowest moments often open the door to healing, how shame and fear keep us from being honest, and why confession is...

Addiction isn’t only about substances—it’s about survival. In this powerful conversation, we reveal how our need for connection can twist into compulsions that look acceptable on the outside but exhaust us on the inside. From food to phones to ministry itself, we expose the subtle ways we try to escape loneliness, fear, and shame. You’ll hear how dopamine, shame, and “chunking” shape addictive cyc...