Return to Heart

Sex addiction is rarely just about sex. In this conversation, Phil and Jeff are joined by Greg Oliver, co-founder of Awaken Recovery, to unpack what addiction really is, why pornography is more powerful than many people realize, and why lasting healing never comes through willpower alone. They explore the neuroscience of addiction, the role of shame, the importance of emotions, why intimacy is so...

What happens when the person you trust most becomes the source of your deepest pain? In Episode 23 of Return to Heart, Phil sits down with Stacey Oliver of Awaken Recovery to discuss betrayal trauma, recovery after sexual addiction, attachment wounds, codependency, and the long road toward healing. Drawing from her own story, Stacey shares what it felt like to discover hidden betrayal, why so many...

Sexual addiction impacts far more than the person struggling—it affects marriages, families, trust, and emotional health. In Episode 22 of Return to Heart, Greg and Stacey Oliver share their deeply personal story of addiction, disclosure, betrayal, recovery, and redemption. Their honest conversation offers practical hope for couples facing difficult realities and reminds listeners that healing is...

What if the single most important thing you can do for your children isn't a parenting strategy? In this episode of the Return to Heart Podcast, Jeff and Phil explore a powerful truth: the best parenting doesn't start with your children — it starts with your own heart. Key Takeaways: • Why emotional presence matters more than parenting techniques • How unresolved wounds can shape the way we parent...

Many of us grow up in environments that feel chaotic, unpredictable, or emotionally unsafe. Without realizing it, we create systems, rituals, and coping strategies just to survive. In this episode of the Return to Heart Podcast, Jeff and Phil explore how the human brain is wired for safety, structure, and connection—and how trauma can push us into cycles of chaos, rigidity, and compulsive coping s...

Why is it so difficult to say what we really need? In this episode of the Return to Heart Podcast, Jeff and Phil explore one of the most profound questions Jesus asks in the New Testament: “What do you want me to do for you?” Through the story of Blind Bartimaeus, they unpack how vulnerability, fear, and faith intersect in moments of emotional and relational healing. Many of us struggle to name ou...

Why do we bounce between anxiety and emotional shutdown,? In this episode, Jeff and Phil explore the concept of the “window of tolerance”—the emotional space where we can stay present, relational, and resilient even when life is hard. In this episode you’ll learn: • Why we cycle between anxiety and depression • How resentment, rage, and self-pity can reveal deeper emotions • Why telling your story...

In this episode of the Return to Heart podcast, Jeff and Phil explore the psychological concept of the Window of Tolerance and how trauma, anxiety, and depression can shape our ability to stay emotionally present. Along the way, they reflect on how God designed us as integrated beings - body, mind, and spirit - and why learning to pay attention to our bodies plays a key role in emotional and relat...

In today’s episode, we dive into one of the most important and least-discussed topics in Christian discipleship: sexual integrity - what it means, why it matters, and how men and women can move toward wholeness in an area where many people quietly struggle. Key takeaways: • Why sexual integrity is about wholeness, not perfection • The cultural forces shaping how we think about sexuality • The conn...

What happens when faith, addiction, and honesty collide? In this episode of the Return to Heart Podcast, we explore the deep and often misunderstood relationship between the 12 Steps, the Church, and true discipleship. What begins with judgment turns into gratitude, humility, and transformation. This conversation unpacks how the 12 Steps became a life jacket, not a replacement for faith—but a path...

Addiction doesn’t just affect the person acting out—it impacts everyone connected to them. In this episode of Return to Heart, the conversation turns toward the often-overlooked reality of spouses, children, parents, and loved ones living alongside addiction. Through personal stories, clinical insight, and family systems theory, the hosts explore what it’s like to be on the other side of compulsiv...

What if your feelings were never the enemy of your faith? In this episode of Return to Heart , we explore how neuroscience, Scripture, and lived human experience all point to the same truth: God designed us to feel first, not last . From John Calvin to modern brain science, from attachment theory to Scripture, this conversation reveals how healing, transformation, and spiritual maturity happen thr...

What if the way many of us were taught to grow spiritually actually cost us intimacy with God? In this episode of Return To Heart , Jeff and Phil explore a story that shaped decades of faith, discipleship, and emotional disconnection—beginning in a Yale dorm room in 1980 and unfolding into a powerful conversation about facts, feelings, faith, and how God actually designed us. Through vivid metapho...

Most of us have spent a lifetime becoming right-leg dominant — relying on intellect, morality, and sheer willpower to survive life. But, the parts of us designed for intimacy, connection, and vulnerability? Those got left behind. In this episode of Return to Heart , we unpack one of the most transformative metaphors we’ve ever used: 👉 The right leg and the left leg. Drawing from tens of thousands...

Alignment isn’t about perfection — it’s about returning home to who God made us to be. In this episode of Return to Heart, we explore the final stage of the transformational process: alignment—stepping out of hiding, confronting shame, receiving acceptance, and rediscovering our God-given identity. Through honest storytelling, real-time vulnerability, and examples from Scripture—including the Prod...

Welcome back to the Transformational Process series. In this episode, we explore one of the most healing and redemptive steps in the journey of spiritual and emotional recovery: Acceptance. Following last week’s conversation on Admission , this episode dives into why acceptance is essential for wholeness, how it restores connection, and why we cannot grow without relationships that meet us with “M...

In this raw and honest episode, the Tin Man team — Jeff, Todd, and Phil — explore the power of admission: the moment when life’s pain and exhaustion become too heavy to carry, and we finally come to ourselves. Drawing from the story of the Prodigal Son in Luke 15, they discuss why our lowest moments often open the door to healing, how shame and fear keep us from being honest, and why confession is...

Addiction isn’t only about substances—it’s about survival. In this powerful conversation, we reveal how our need for connection can twist into compulsions that look acceptable on the outside but exhaust us on the inside. From food to phones to ministry itself, we expose the subtle ways we try to escape loneliness, fear, and shame. You’ll hear how dopamine, shame, and “chunking” shape addictive cyc...

We’re made for attachment—but many of us learned to survive by not attaching. Jeff and Phil explore how early abandonment, toxic shame, and fear train us to confuse intensity for intimacy, and what it looks like to regrow our “Velcro” in real relationships. You’ll hear a son who stands his ground, friends who travel to grieve with —and why the four S’s (seen, soothed, safe, secure) matter so much....

In this episode of Return to Heart, Jeff and Phil explore the meaning of attunement — the deep, relational connection that allows us to truly be seen and known. Through vivid metaphors, a humorous moment at the symphony, and heartfelt stories about parenting, marriage, and faith, this conversation shows how attunement brings restoration, combats loneliness, and invites us back to the heart. Whethe...

In this episode of Return to Heart , we unpack the difference between healthy and toxic shame, how childhood abandonment shapes the stories we tell ourselves, and why God calls us back to live unashamed and loved. Shame was never meant to define us, yet many of us carry the lie that our needs make us “too much,” “not enough,” or “unlovable.” Together, we explore: The biblical picture of healthy sh...

What is abandonment, really? At its core, it’s this: “I needed you, and you weren’t there for me.” Whether it’s parents, friends, coaches, or even people who were in the room but emotionally absent, abandonment leaves a mark on all of us. You’ll hear: The simplest and most powerful definition of abandonment Why the brain registers abandonment the same way it registers physical pain Stories of how...

Discover the meaning of Imago Dei and what it means to find your identity in Christ. In this episode of Return to Heart , Todd Warmers and Phil Herndon share Christian transformation stories that reveal how God sees you, why relationships matter, and how Jesus speaks to your deepest self. Through personal experiences, Bible teaching, and practical insights, they unpack what it means to be created...

How to Reconnect with God, Yourself & Others (The Tin Man Story)— Jeff Schulte, Todd Wermers, and Phil Herndon share personal stories of burnout, healing, and transformation. Learn what it means to “return to heart,” reconnect emotionally, and build deeper relationships with God and others. Using the Tin Man from The Wizard of Oz as a metaphor, they explore self-awareness, emotional health, an...