Untoxicated Podcast

Doing the hard work of recovery, for the former drinker and the partner, is how we reduce anxiety, regulate our nervous systems, start to rebuild trust, and grow to our potential. There is no bigger gift to our families than to prioritize our recoveries. Sheri and Matt discuss things that do not prioritize recovery work, and are, therefore, total crap. They also talk about ear hair and porn and Sh...

New from  Sober and Unashamed : “Cabbage Overdose” Maybe you are unaware of our hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Or maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to our latest written offering titled: “Cabbage Overdose” To read this and much more, check out or  Sober and Unashamed  Blog.

Kathy and Nikki have lived through the trauma and chaos of alcoholism. With both of their husbands now years into sobriety, Kathy and Nikki are evolving their recovery work into continued growth and self care with the Defining You podcast and facebook page. Are you curious about what’s next beyond recovery? Kathy and Nikki explore challenges and interests that might challenge and interest yo...

New from  Sober and Unashamed : “An Evolving Tradition” Maybe you are unaware of our hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Or maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to our latest written offering titled: “An Evolving Tradition” To read this and much more, check out or  Sober and Unash...

For a long time – through early sobriety and years into growth and recovery – Matt shared the blame for his addiction with his father, with Big Beverage, with AA, and with other societal influences. He shared the blame because he couldn’t carry the stigma and burden himself. Only through the powerful recovery dimension of time can Matt own the blame for his addiction and peaceful...

New from  Sober and Unashamed : “Who the f&@% is this guy?” Maybe you are unaware of our hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Or maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to our latest written offering titled: “Who the f&@% is this guy?” To read this and much more, check out or  Sober...

Sheri and Matt share findings about sexual desire discrepancy in relationships impacted by alcoholism from a year-long study of 13 couples now in recovery. Matt shares an unnecessarily large amount of data which Sheri tempers with eye rolls you can actually hear through your speakers. The bottom line: Alcoholism both exacerbates and results from sexual desire discrepancy, and the solutions are emp...

New from  Sober and Unashamed : “Accumulation” Maybe you are unaware of our hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Or maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to our latest written offering titled: “Accumulation” To read this and much more, check out or  Sober and Unashamed  Blog.

Billy Wynne has been a student of Buddhism and mindfulness for 30 years, and he teaches and is on the board at the Zen Center of Denver. Billy joins Sheri and Matt to talk about the philosophies and lived experiences featured in his new book, The Empty Path: Finding Fulfillment through the Radical Art of Lessening . Billy’s pursuit of material success conflicted with his Buddhist practices,...

New from Sober and Unashamed : “Momentum” Maybe you are unaware of our hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Or maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to our latest written offering titled: “Momentum” To read this and much more, check out or  Sober and Unashamed  Blog.

Lasting sobriety and recovery from alcoholism requires both commitment and a plan, and the role of the partner in the recovery of the drinker is quite limited. On this episode, Sheri and Matt go into detail, and share lots of options, for what will, and will not, meet these two requirements leading to successful recovery. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from conn...

New from the “Underlying Issues” series on  Sober and Unashamed : “Numbers” Maybe you are unaware of our hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Or maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to our latest written offering titled: “Numbers” To read t...

Lori is a five-time guest on the podcast for very good reason – she brings a fresh an intelligent perspective to every conversation. On this episode, Lori explains the emotional safety she is experiencing in her marriage, and how replacing bad memories with good combines with her faith, and her own person trauma and resentment processing work, to bring her joy and peacefulness. She does the...

Acute addiction gets all the headlines – when the drinker drinks too much and creates chaos and trauma. But the fog chronic alcoholism rolls into the spaces between drinks – when the alcoholic is temporarily sober but operating with a warped mind. The fog of chronic alcoholism impacts the loved ones and the drinker in different ways. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery...

Rose stayed in her alcoholic marriage until she could stay no longer. The impact on her nervous system made her methodical and planned decision to separate her only choice. Listen to Rose reflect on the turning points she experienced as she felt her nervous system heal. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out o...

Sheri and Matt run through the top ten things alcoholics say to their partners. Do you recognize your relationship in their conversation? If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our  Echoes of Recovery  program. If you would like to support the  Untoxicated Podcast  with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation,...

Trigger warning: Domestic violence is discussed John Olander has a network of relationships all over Denver, and he is as tenacious as he is inspiring. But John experienced 20 dark years, crossing over the line from high-functioning alcoholism into self-inflicted, alcohol-fueled legal issues which led to homelessness and isolation. But he bounced back, and his is a true success story of letting go...

Blame serves a purpose when trying to heal from alcoholism as the drinker or the partner. But there are areas where blame does not belong. In this episode, Sheri and Matt break down the impact of blame, and discuss the foundational elements of recovering from the blame of addiction. If you would like to support the  Untoxicated Podcast  with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to  Su...

Ayla Fleming is a licensed clinical social worker and telehealth therapist practicing in Pennsylvania, New Jersey, and New York. Since specializing in helping individuals, couples, and families recovering from codependency related to addiction, her personal well-being, and that of her clients, is surging. To contact Ayla, please check out her website . And for more on Bowen Family Systems Theory,...

Drinkers often becomes aware of the loss of identity associated with sobriety, but on this episode, Sheri and Matt discuss the role of varying categories of identity as a cause of addiction. Sheri reveals her love of smiting people, and Matt explains his eagerness to meet in Topeka at 8am Monday morning. If you would like to support the  Untoxicated Podcast  with an monthly tax deductible $10 dona...

The recovery community is full of resources about sex after alcohol for singles, but sober sex in relationships is a topic that has been ignored…until now. Nicole, Tess, and Alan are featured on this episode with input from eight people in recovery who have faced a variety of challenges with sex in sobriety. If you would like to support the  Untoxicated Podcast  with an monthly tax deductibl...

Trigger warning: sexual assault and violence Unconsented sex occurs in relationships impacted by problematic alcohol consumption at a rate 18 times more frequently than in general population relationships. Sheri and Matt discuss this and other tragic statistics, and the implications for partnerships in recovery, as well as for our broader alcohol culture. If you would like to support the  Untoxica...

It was not her choice. Kelly shared with her husband what she needed from the marriage, and he asked for a divorce. Sometimes boundaries and detachment are not enough for the drinker to seek recovery. But Kelly is working hard on her growth and recovery plan, and she is finding relief and peacefulness in a house free from the pain of addiction. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery...

Attachment and connection are not the same thing. Detachment in a healthy relationship in recovery from alcoholism is a permanent state. If done with respect, consistency, and emotional safety, choosing times and topics for connection can help a partnership thrive. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our  E...

You can almost hear the turquoise Caribbean waves lapping in the background of this conversation recorded live from the annual Marriagevolution retreat, this year in the Bahamas. Hear how things change over time, both in relationships and in families, as individual recovery progresses for former drinkers and their partners. Listen to Jenn talk about no longer feeling compelled to, “move arou...