Going Terribly

It's National Forklift Safety Day! So put on those wrist braces and compression sleeves and mouth guards and dental dams cuz you don't want an unsafe incident. Neither the string cheese nor spaghetti kind. Other discussion topics may include: - The eating of each other's sins...and other acts of love - An apology to TBS. With caveats. - Serious medical conditions, such as albinism, nut...

We here at Going Terribly have a history of jinxing beloved celebrities who die suddenly before their momentous birthdays, so to be safe, we have waited until our dear friend, Gennie Adams, was safely ensconced in her fifth decade before inviting her onto the podcast. Let's just hope she doesn't contract a touch of the gonorrhea from the muddy water that she'll be crawling through this...

So ladies, do you ever have a front fart? Like a fart that instead of escaping out the back, burbles up the front? Alice can't be the only one, right? Other discussion topics may include: - Ode to a Korean corn dog - The Federalist Papers. Whatever those are. - Bulletproof wheat, Jewish mac and cheese, exploding cakes, and more things you may find at your local grocery - An introduction to an...

We're trying to boost our ratings by saying incendiary things about beloved personalities. Watch out, Betty White, Ryan Reynolds, Mel Gibson, Queen Camilla. We're coming for you. Other discussion topics may include: - Is James Marsden good enough to be enchanted by? - How to use ears as handlebars (note: only applies to British royalty) - The passing of the flag baton torch - When did the...

Nothing but CRIME happening in this episode. Rat thievery.* Puppy abuse.** Serial killing.*** Other discussion topics may include: - Handheld vegetables and the gloves that hold them - The underrated flavor combination of household cleaner and barbecue pork - How to pepper in some incest to give a story some humor - The latest, tiniest, most gluten-filled member of the 27 Club - Grand Theft Horsey...

It's a lot of people's birthdays today, and they're all EXTREMELY relevant :D And Alice had a classic bonehead misadventure down at the historic Reitz Home Museum Bourbon and Bowties soiree and has lived to tell the tale! It'll make you clutch your pearls and say, "My stars!" Other discussion topics may include: - Games on phones, chips on shoulders, and pinkings on wood...

You know how Alice and Doug generally just talk out of their asses? Well, they do their due diligence and correct their falsehoods too. It's time for Dueling It Went Terriblys! Other discussion topics may include: - A look at that delicious, salty penguin blood - When to take away a kid's Switch. And switchblade. - The vasectomy that ended the Lincoln lineage - How to file with the Nationa...

Have you ever gotten into a frisky time race against the clock in one of those super deluxe car washes that's like a sudsy, frilly rave inside? It's like a Neon Demon fever dream. Other discussion topics may include: - Hoity toity privileged (possibly cowboy) butlers - Explanations of important pieces of history, such as Del Amitri and Ultimate Chicken Horse - Season recap of Law and Order...

This week is a short one because Alice is dead and Doug is dying, and what's gonna happen to the podcast?! Would any of y'all step up to host? Who are we kidding, there's probably a line of you a mile long, vying for these coveted spots. Right? Right??? Other discussion topics may include: - Coffee Monster vs. Coughie Monster: Which is scarier? - The birthday of superstars actress Mint...

Wouldn't it be interesting if both Abraham Lincoln and William Shakespeare didn't know how to read or write until they were 16? Well, it's not true, so don't go spreading it around. We could get sued! Other discussion topics may include: - A game that literally came out of the bathroom - The legend of former U.S. President Bill Hank Harry - As the NBA playoffs get going, who's...

It's time for Dueling It Went Terriblys! We're switching up the format with a livelier, more interactive, tit-for-tat (heh) segment on all the mistakes we've made in the past month. On the podcast, and in our lives. It's sobering as hell. Other discussion topics may include: - Ride share inconsistencies, such as stopping for gas or finding a dead body - How to earn a dishonorary do...

What's your favorite pasta shape? What would you put on your vanity license plate? Would you ever perform a midnight blood ritual to help your roses grow? All these scintillating questions and more in this week's episode! Other discussion topics may include: - The sanitary dangers of reading smut on a plane - Infamous Satan worshippers...such as Ralph - The absolute waste of being a vegan...

In this lexicographic episode, we learn the meaning of newly minted dictionary words like deadass and cakeism. We also cover some St. Patrick's Day trivia. Yeah yeah, we're late. So sue us. Other discussion topics may include: - How to tell how angry someone is just by smelling them - The pinnacle of Halle Berry's Hollywood career (spoiler: it's The Flintstones) - The understandabl...

Daylight Saving Time just ended. Who has time to read a description? Let's just do some more alternate episode titles! Two French Futbolers in a Tickle Fight Two Michael Caine Bears in a Crime of Passion Two Decorated Gymnasts in a Niagara Falls Barrel Suicide Two Deities without a Cause in a Greek Chorus Two Reformed Bad Boys in a Mean Pizza Pie Two Named Beneficiaries in a Yo Mama Joke Two Out-o...

It's Women's History Month, and we have another scintillating installment of Alice's Menstrual Cup Journey. Oooof course. Other discussion topics may include: - Checking in with the Diabetersons - Writing checks that your ass (or cow) can cash - How a woman's menstrual cycle compares to a Metallica song - Accidental Johnny Carson impressions - A pair of Harlands and one sucked starfish

Past Tense Cher. Semi Recent Semi Decent News: The Game. Racist Musicals. Can you handle all this frivolity? Other discussion topics may include: - How young is too young to teach a kid about DNA tests? - Eff around and find out how to offend keynote speakers - Yosemite Sam and "Macho Man" Randy Savage are essentially the real person, right? - Boob experimentation and other times you might have yo...

How does one order bubble tea? There are so many options! Between the bases, the flavors, the bursts, the creams, it's all just one sexy, existential conundrum after another. And the straws are just too damn big. I mean, they're the right size to get the job done, but must they be so Freudian? Other discussion topics may include: - Could anything in the world handle 70 pounds of cocaine all at onc...

Love is in the air, y'all, and boy, do we have a special treat in store! A mega-jumbo-epic episode with the most sordid (or assorted?) couple ever, Amelia and Naem Madi!  Hear their Nicholas Sparks-esque romance saga, play some VD* games, and learn everything you never wanted to know about the seriously traumatic mating rituals of some of the kinkiest animals in the whole dang kingdom. Seriou...

We haven't done It Went Terribly in a while, so you're gonna learn A LOT about things you didn't even know you wanted to know! You know? Other discussion topics may include: - Far better things to do with fruitcakes rather than eat them - Cow squirts - The nostalgic power of old appliance boxes and teen dramas - So many Bozos! - Young ladies married to horny rabbits...?

This is gonna be one of those gross episodes where we talk about weird body anomalies. You'll love it. Other discussion topics may include: - The underappreciated Old Dick Ruck - Hollywood's absolutely shameless nepo-puppy pandemic - A reason to owe Ewan McGregor (and anyone with a good sense of humor) an apology - What flavor toe jam goes best on a peanut butter sandwich? - Backwards things, such...

It was Doug's birthday yesterday, so you better have wished him a happy one! At least one that isn't filled with trivia questions and words that almost rhyme but don't. OH BUT WAIT... Other discussion topics may include: - What makes Daddy Magic poop his pants? - Drain brain, lost balls, and other medical ailments - The difference between hot chocolate sauce and hot chocolate sauce - What hat is t...

Do y'all remember auralexisynchronocity? The word that Alice made up referring to the phenomenon of hearing a word and reading it at the same time? How often does it happen to you?! If a lot, then shouldn't the word become official? If not a lot, does the world just revolve around Alice? Other discussion topics may include: - Where is the most surprising place you've matriculated? - Blood from pla...

Is there anything in this whole wide world that is worse than burning your mouth on hot food? Other discussion topics may include: - What to do when garlic knots flip you the bird - Do you really want to live forever? Forever? - Weird sexual snake stuff - A Hall of Fame for stones and dinner breads - Hafshafhashfasshashaffashashfaahash

It's been a long December, and there's reason to believe, maybe this year will be about the same as the last. Join our perennial New Year's guests, Jason & Candi Vincent, for games, performances, and a whole lotta Dick [Clark] jokes ;) Other discussion topics may include: - How to hold your favorite corpse together using ordinary household tape - Cerebral umbilical cords - Brad Pitt cutting up...

Is this the episode that leads to us getting whacked? Like, off? The one where we inadvertently stumble into a centuries-long conspiracy involving the Mob, and trigonometry, and commedia dell'arte, and are never heard from again? Stay tuned... Other discussion topics may include: - How to tell how much guacamole is in your DNA - The Venn Diagram of clowns, mobsters, and soda marketing execs is far...