We Hate Movies

This week on OSL , we're checking in on a few films from this year's Sundance Film Festival , including Kneecap, Dìdi, and Skywalkers: A Love Story ; reviewing the now-streaming haunted pool film, Night Swim ; reacting to the trailer for the new Road House motion picture, along with the headache that Doug Liman is getting from Amazon over it; analyzing the weekend box office, paltry as it is; and...

“Poor Beethoven and Droopy are never gonna get high again!” - Chris, on the crooked veterinarian in this movie On this week’s episode, we’re ending our survey of some of last year’s biggest stinkers with a real wild one on the [EDITOR’S NOTE: Not too terrible! - Andrew] ninth sequel in this most miserable film franchise, Saw X ! How fun is it to see John Kramer actually walking around the room whi...

On the winter premiere of OSL , we're looking over the weekend box office numbers to see how the January drought is doing this year, reviewing Statham in The Beekeeper , along with the new sci-fi paranoid thriller, I.S.S. , chatting about the first two episodes of the all-new True Detective: Night Country , and whole-heartedly recommending picking up the 4K blu-ray set of the Criterion Collection'...

“Kill any of these people! Is it possible for any of them to die?” - Steve on the titular Expendables On this week’s episode, after we figure out how to pronounce the title, we’re chatting about the fourth, and likely final, film in the franchise, Expend4bles ! Is it time to wrap up the franchise when the casting ‘gets’ keep getting smaller and smaller? Why can’t Jason Statham and Tony Jaa get som...

“Is [the ‘prayers up’ thing] still going on? Is he still charging people to pray?” - Steve On this week’s episode, we’re hitting the road with Mark Wahlberg and his fake family in the almost-Secret Movie™️, The Family Plan! How hilarious is it watching Mark get covered in that cherry slushy? Should this gamer kid be throwing up that hand signal? Is the matrimonial magic dead when your anniversary...

“Oppie New Year!” - The Gang On the first We ❤️ Movies episode of 2024, we’re chatting about a real-deal banger, and one-half of last year’s massively successful box office double bill, Christopher Nolan’s Oppenheimer ! How fabulous is this cast? How funny is Oppie’s Batman moment? How wonderful is it to experience all these in-camera practical effects the masterful VFX team created? And couldn’t...

“If I was Blipped and came back, I’d rather be dead at that point!” - Eric On this episode, we’re doing our best to make our way through what could possibly be the nadir of the MCU, Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania ! How did they release this thing as-is with all the poorly rendered CGI? Did any of these actors actually want to be in this movie? Were they trying to wedge in a bad TV series with a...

“All the Nolans [movies] are present here; I’m surprised no one’s a fucking magician!” - Steve On our first episode of the year, the four of us bend our understanding of reality to chat about a real massive let down, Robert Rodriguez’s Hypnotic ! What in the world were they thinking with all these garbage twists? How much exposition can you expect one Dunkin’ Donuts-loving man to drop in a single...

“What I don’t understand, is how he does not have a guest room for people to come visit him!” - Chris on Santa’s lackluster accommodations On our final episode of 2023, we’re racing toward New Year’s to get away from the exhausting, Ghost of Christmas Movies Past that is, Fred Claus ! Why did they have Rachel Weisz’s character be a traffic cop? Is Vince’s character seriously trying to open a brand...

“He’s such an idiot for running right into this fucking turbine…” - Eric on Alan Rickman’s character’s adultery On this week’s episode, our mission to bring Holiday Cheer to you and yours is almost completely derailed with a jumbo-sized discussion on the bloated, miserable, obnoxious holiday fave, Love Actually ! When is the feature-length Andrew Lincoln stalker film hitting Shudder? Why couldn’t...

“All this, over the treatment of a magic cookie-eater!” - Chris on Santa Claus-related outrage   On this week’s holly-jolly horror-tinged episode, we’re chatting about the totally kick-ass Christmas slasher, Silent Night Deadly Night ! Why couldn’t they have bothered to actually name the psychiatric institute in this movie? Were there zero dollars set aside for background extras? How despicable is...

On this week's show, the guys are chatting about the new monster smash, Godzilla Minus One ; the new Alexander Payne/Paul Giamatti jam, The Holdovers ; John Woo's (just okay) Hollywood return with Silent Night ; a couple of disastrous Netflix Christmas movies including the abhorrent Best. Christmas. Ever! ; the in-depth Star Wars Holiday Special documentary, A Disturbance in the Force ; and more!...

“Like most motion pictures, this needed way more Reginald VelJohnson” - Andrew On this week’s episode, we’re chatting about the high body count/low IQ, Christmas-set sequel, Die Hard 2 ! Why couldn’t they have developed a script where now-LAPD detective John McClane has some adventure on the streets of Los Angeles instead of a boring D.C. airport? How amazingly scuzzy and inept is Dennis Franz’s C...

On the November 2023 edition of WHM Mail Bag , the guys are reading some outrageous letters from listeners about things like Crispin Glover freaking out before a film screening, one eager fan of The Hunger Games that absolutely destroyed a movie theater bathroom (and himself in the process), a US naval officer who got mixed up on his way to the toilet during basic training, and one person looking...

“Just imagine like, to distract someone, you send a police car careening through your own house!” - Eric On this month’s patrons-only W❤️M we’re talking about one of the all-time greats, the Christmas action comedy, Lethal Weapon ! Has there been a movie duo with faster chemistry than Riggs and Murtaugh? Why are we giving Rodge a birthday—FREEZE! This is just a li'l taste of this wild episode! To...

On the triumphant return of OSL after a two-week break, we're reviewing all kinds of movies including Royal (or Rotten?) Rid's Napoleon , Phil Traill’s Good Burger 2 , and Eli Roth's Thanksgiving . We're also going over the holiday weekend box office, and even a couple truly rancid Secret Movies™️ that star the likes of Uma Thurman, Samuel L. Jackson and Morgan Freeman! Hachi machi! DON’T MISS  OU...

“If ever you needed a showcase for the brilliance of Michael Keaton, you just need to show various clips of this performance” - Andrew  On this week’s episode, We ❤️ Movies month wraps up with a convo about one of our absolute faves, Beetlejuice ! How incredible is Michael Keaton in this movie? How cool is all the stop motion weirdness? Is this Tim Burton’s best film? And how unsettling is it to s...

“He looks like a 1980’s standup comedian!” - Andrew on Deckard’s clothing On this week’s episode, W❤️M month takes us to 2019 Los Angeles to chat about Royal Rid’s magnificent science fiction classic, Blade Runner ! How stunning is the confidence of this film? Was Rutger Hauer ever better in a role? Is there a weirder coat in cinema than the one James Hong sports in this? How creepy are William Sa...

“I, in my home, right now, have a bat from the movie Batman Begins ” - Steve On this week’s episode, W❤️M month continues as we chat about Chris Nolan’s fabulous comic book adaptation, Batman Begins ! Has there been a softer Little Boy Bruce Wayne in cinema? Why couldn’t they have put a little more spirit gum on Liam Neeson’s goatee at the beginning? How fantastic is Cillian Murphy in this and sho...

On this week's show, the guys are talking about Mike Flanagan's The Fall of the House of Usher and Sofia Coppola's Priscilla, reacting to the trailers for Marvel's Echo and 20th Century Studios' Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes & more! 

“This is one of those movies I wish I could’ve seen opening night in 1960” - Eric On this week’s episode, We ❤️ Movies Month kicks off with a total banger as the guys discuss the prequel to Psycho II , Alfred Hitchcock’s Psycho ! How great is this Bernard Herrmann score? Is Marion eating a cheese and mayonnaise sandwich? Would the film have been as good if Norman was cast more book-accurate (middl...

On this month’s patrons-only We Hate Movies episode, the guys are chatting about the total misfire of a YA adaptation, The Hunger Games ! Couldn’t they have tossed in just a little more violence? Why are we doing faux-doc shaky cam? Couldn’t we have some continuity with this—HEY NOW! This episode is for subscribers only! To access the full show, along with hours upon hours of exclusive WHM content...

On this week's On-Screen Live , the guys are going over the weekend box office, chatting about Marty's new film, Killers of the Flower Moon , as well as the not-so-great PG-13 Five Nights at Freddy's , recommending some Halloween horror viewing, and chatting with author Brian Abrams about his rad, new book, "You Talkin' to Me?: The Definitive Guide to Iconic Movie Quotes" which you can (and should...

“It is ugly as sin, this amulet… it better protect you from evil, otherwise…” Chris On the final Spooktacular episode of 2023, the guys bring on their beloved bud, Ben Worcester to chat about the unfairly maligned Satanic Panic picture, The Devil’s Rain ! Why couldn’t they have Ernest Borgnine in a Hawaiian shirt here at some point? Was this film’s makeup the inspiration for the Shatner Captain Ki...

On the spooktacular October edition of WHM Mail Bag, the guys are reading letters about Jason Miller’s Scranton pride, a dude who was WAY too into the Saw franchise, a disastrous screening of the first Sex and the City movie, and one terrifying tale about fella who really messed up during some quality Alone Time with himself! PLUS: Is the President stealing our material?  Do you have a question fo...