TIK TOK ROCK

a quick song I wrote for the God kids all about so many different beeps squeaks and peeps in the car in the home you just can't get any sleep for that infernal bleep.

A short song written for my god daughter lily was just becoming a teen and like myself her parents seemed to be going through a little bit of hell and high water of a midlife crisis it all feels very unnerving.

A song about emperors and kings who believe themselves to be the devine demagoguery If a devine deity did arrive on planet earth these mobsters and megalomaniacs would see them quickly murdered .

Blue bloods are quite simply mad !! , they treat normal reality as an inconvenient triviality rules to them don't exist  and the rest of mortality are kept around as fluffers for their pansexuality

A little impromptu ditty about a friend who we use to call Brandy Man a strange manifestation use to happen with dire consciences every time he drank brandy he'd think he was a superman .l throw it together on a train from Harrogate to sandy strange as you sing it into shape softly people think you've gone mad talking to yourself .

A musing about my father's experience aboard a super cruise liner where he and most of the old poeple on board contracted some terrible infection that almost killed them and this was before the Covid Cruise Lines came along , interestingly you can see how you could end up with a Marie Celeste where everybody aboard ends up dead

A song dedicated to my long standing landlord who grew up in Bradford from humble origins a true rags to riches who started out with very little an outside toilet and some thick skin then after a life of skinflinting strife and hard work became very rich but even after acquiring great wealth he still retained his humble honest beggar man roots and rhetoric , also without realising he helped me to...

A short song about some one who has decided to live on two packets of rolos per day to loose weight.

A little ditty I wrote for Lily who's eleven we started singing a song for her father who's a sommelier and drinks fine wine all the time and also holds wine tasting with his Classé cru( crew) they all sample some really expensive brut (brew) I've made the wines sound almost female with sexual connotations due to his descriptive duologue on various liquid libations sounding like a women i.e she's...

This is a short song I wrote for Colette's birthday she's an angel faced florist who works out of a norman church on a country estate, surrounded by angelic statues all halos and wings adding to this heavenly scene is her being bathed and baptized in the divine light from the stain glassed windows along with the scent from the flowers you think you've arrived at the garden of Eden.

A song written about my rolly Polly fat flat mate who lost a massive amount of weight becoming ever so serious and slim , I on the other hand have taken his place becoming fat and happy obviously morphing to the company I've kept .

A little ditty I wrote about McDonald's whilst sitting in McDonald's , this fast food chain has now become part of our daily lives ,its the biggest burger bar brand on the planet, I wonder if it will be the first in the race to build one in out of space?.

A little swing jazz tune written for a friend who has an extremely high sex drive it uses the feminine and the masculine tense due to the person in question being bisexual he once called him self a sexual psychopath.

The birds and bees have joined us from the flowers and trees you find them at Macdonald's an champagne bars lapping up our left over cream teas they'll hardly be floaty lite on the breeze after feasting on our fat fantastic sleaze.

A slow smoochy song for Nina ,I thought I'd possibly compare thee to a woodland tree x

A song written for a lover who's sexy symbiosis seemed to take over my DNA untill we became almost tanalisigly telepathic I still ended up as her sex toy.

A song about two tramps in cider park harrogate with a little dog she's an up market girl from Harrogate ladies collage who's fallen from grace he's just a Bowery bum the lady and the tramp the reason I mentioned the red rubber stamp is because that's what you're usually given by every government department and then of cause when they find you dead frozen to the ground a THE BIG RED RUBBER STAMP (...

A song about Prostitution one of the oldest professions in the world which was here before the four angels of Samuel it's about time the government had the bravery to take control of this modern day slavery let's face facts  the chancellor's been selling narcotics i.e cigarettes an booze for hundreds of years so why allow the criminals any vice take over all their operations and save these poor gi...

With courage commitment and candour these extraordinary women did something that had never been done before and that was to bring the age of equality knocking loudly upon the British empires front door .

A song for a love honey we called Ann Summers due to her working there, she asked me for a birthday card poem and caused me a writer's block which when I tried to explain she cursed me a look of pure disdain , so I wrote this along the lines of a frigid flustering fool that she'd doubtless be serving at the Ann summers shop. Katie looks at all men with indifference and always takes fun from them ,...

The British boarding schools were without doubt what built the British Empire, anyone subjected to this kind of cruelty or brutal treatment could easily subjugate a sufferance over someone else especially another nationality or creed which the British empire managed to achieve for a few hundred years each school had peculiar traits, Eton for instance use to be famous for its flage fridays where in...

I have been scratching scribe to script and burning tallow onto table in order to bring you a fabulously free A to Z of musical melody