The Long Take

January hasn’t even ended yet and Netflix India is already back to regularly scheduled programming. Mission Majnu —the streamer’s Republic Day offering—is real bottom of the barrel stuff. We discuss the Sidharth Malhotra and Rashmika Mandanna-starrer “spy” film’s inept plotting, grating performances, and its questionable politics. We also wonder what qualifications one needs in Bollywood to b...

Drishyam 2 —the Hindi remake of the hit Malayalam film—is now out on Amazon Prime Video, which means that it’s time for us to re-enter the morally dubious world of Ajay Devgn’s Vijay Salgaonkar. We discuss the sequel’s shorter run time, and whether that makes it a better viewing experience than the first film. We also talk about Tabu’s reduced role, the deliberately convoluted plotting, and Akshay...

We apologise for reminding you that Phone Bhoot exists. We discuss the horror comedy’s complete lack of scares and laughs, and wonder how it could attract name actors such as Katrina Kaif, Ishaan Khatter, and Siddhant Chaturvedi. But more mystifying is how producers Farhan Akhtar and Ritesh Sidhwani have managed to get away with ripping off Ghostbusters iconography without anybody suing them. Alon...

To kick off the new year, we’re listing down our top 10 films of 2022. Our lists span from an old-fashioned musical to a documentary that has the year’s most astonishing scene. We’ve also got two politically-charged French movies about entirely different issues—and for the first time in the history of this podcast, a shared number one. For those looking for deeper appreciation, check out the full...

Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery , Rian Johnson’s follow-up to his hit 2019 whodunnit, is further proof that the filmmaker remains unparalleled at genre deconstructions. We discuss the film’s cleverly-plotted mystery, the topical satire, and Daniel Craig’s central performance as the detective Benoit Blanc. We also wonder if Johnson’s eat-the-rich commentary was sharp enough to truly cut through t...

Avatar: The Way of Water has some of the most stunning visual effects ever put on the big screen, but is that enough to make up for the thin writing? We discuss director James Cameron’s tendency to lean on tropes, the film’s relaxed second half, and the cutting-edge high frame rate technology. We also praise Cameron’s rare ability to stage large-scale action, and speculate about the franchise’s fu...

Director Antoine Fuqua seems an unsuitable match for Emancipation , the new Will Smith movie, now out on Apple TV+. We discuss the film’s style-over-substance approach to serious themes, Smith’s undeniable star power, and its inability to flesh out its protagonist despite being a one-man show. — Hosted by Akhil Arora and Rohan Naahar , The Long Take is fully bootstrapped. Please consider donating...

Qala —the new Netflix film by Bulbbul  director Anvitaa Dutt—is so obsessed with superficial beauty that it forgets to peel beneath the surface. A psychological drama about jealousy and ambition, the movie is a poorly performed, disjointed mess that disrespects the audience’s intelligence and betrays its own themes. — Hosted by Akhil Arora and Rohan Naahar , The Long Take is fully bootst...

Kantara , the Kannada-language blockbuster—now playing on Amazon Prime Video after major theatrical success—is a hyper-masculine celebration of bad behaviour. But more problematically, it’s a movie that undermines its own themes. Instead of examining environmentalism, caste discrimination, and authoritarianism, Kantara prefers showing you two burly guys fighting in the mud. — Hosted by Akhil Arora...

We’re divided on Vasan Bala’s difficult-to-categorise Monica, O My Darling , out now on Netflix. We discuss the film’s convoluted plot, its tone-hopping structure, and Bala’s hyper-stylised filmmaking. And we also talk about the overbearing soundtrack, the dubious perspective, and the ambiguous ending. — Hosted by Akhil Arora and Rohan Naahar , The Long Take is fully bootstrapped. Please consider...

Ayan Mukerji’s fantasy film Brahmāstra —out on Disney+ Hotstar after a theatrical run—is an outright disaster on several fronts. It wastes its massive budget on sub-par visual effects, routinely forgets that it has to write meaningful scenes for Alia Bhatt’s female lead, and reduces Amitabh Bachchan to an exposition machine. We also discuss the film’s failure on both a narrative and visual level,...

There was a lot riding on House of the Dragon , the first Game of Thrones spin-off, which ended its 10-episode debut season last week. We discuss how the show succeeds independently of not just its predecessor, but also when it is held up in comparison with The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power . We also talk about its slow-burn palace intrigue, how deftly it establishes its characters, and it...

Dobaaraa , a sci-fi remake that takes the plot of a mediocre movie and somehow makes it worse, is probably the worst film of Anurag Kashyap’s career. We discuss its unnecessary comedic scenes, the illogical plot construction, and the filmmaker’s lack of faith in the audience’s intelligence. We also wonder—again—how Taapsee Pannu is still considered a movie star, despite exclusively appearing in te...

It’s difficult to dislike Laal Singh Chaddha —the new Aamir Khan movie, now out on streaming—when it’s trying to be such an uplifting, anti-hate epic. We discuss the film’s unwillingness to deviate from Forrest Gump , Khan’s divisive central performance, and the manner in which it cherrypicks the moments from history it wants to include (and those that it doesn’t). Chapters (00:24) Review: Laal Si...

Blonde is just as divisive as they say. And we are torn, as well. Is Andrew Dominik’s unconventional biopic of Marilyn Monroe an irresponsible and dishonest act of exploitation, or is it a deeply immersive horror film in the vein of Mulholland Drive and Hereditary ? We discuss the film’s epic length, its precise tone, and Ana de Armas’ central performance. We also wonder if it would’ve played...

Liger —with Vijay Deverakonda and Ananya Panday—is easily the worst movie we’ve covered on the podcast, and nothing we say can communicate the utter depravity of what this “film”—from writer-director Puri Jagannadh, and producer Karan Johar—has to offer. We discuss the shocking level of entitlement that can convince people that it’s okay to release something like this, the casually offensive natur...

Jogi is our second brush with director Ali Abbas Zafar after the truly unbearable Prime Video series Tandav , and we should’ve known better than to expect the filmmaker behind Tiger Zinda Hai to deliver a sensitive political drama. We talk about Zafar’s timid filmmaking, his muddled political commentary, and the film’s lack of focus. We also discuss the ways in which Jogi pulls punches, and wonder...

Thor: Love and Thunder is now out on Disney+, which gave us an opportunity to finally figure out if it was a worse theatrical experience, or an at-home viewing experience. Taika Waititi’s second Marvel movie remains a disjointed affair that appears to have solid 10-minute chunks missing. It’s almost as if the old DC Films crew took over. We discuss the film’s messy narrative, its disservice to the...

Is Amazon’s big-budget The Lord of the Rings prequel— The Rings of Power —the lavish fantasy series that fans were hoping for, or is it an unmitigated disaster? We discuss the show’s slow-paced opening two episodes, the connections— both visually and stylistically—to Peter Jackson’s trilogy, and how well the series handles the multiple storylines that it throws the audience into. We also talk abou...

Is Jordan Peele’s Nope —out now in Indian theatres—a meta commentary on his own career, or is it merely his tribute to blockbuster films? We discuss the sci-fi thriller’s deeper themes, its spectacular IMAX cinematography, and theorise about that Gordy’s Home sequence. We also talk about its Steven Spielberg influences, how it treats its central mystery, and where we place Nope on Peele’s fil...

The Bear , one of the best new shows of the year, has arrived in India two months late, on Disney+ Hotstar. Even though it’s made by FX, owned by Disney. Streaming works in mysterious ways. We discuss the show’s tense storytelling, Jeremy Allen White’s terrific lead performance, and draw parallels with not just other films and series about chefs, but also The Godfather and Uncut Gems . Update: The...

Malayankunju —the new Fahadh Faasil movie, now out on Amazon Prime Video—is less the survival thriller that it was marketed as, and more like a surrealist character study. We discuss the film’s disjointed halves, its near-wordless experimental narrative, and whether the detestable protagonist deserves a redemption arc at all. We also talk about A.R. Rahman’s dissonant score, and how the film uses...

Darlings —the new Netflix film starring Alia Bhatt—is yet another Hindi-language comedy that doesn’t know how to navigate serious themes. We talk about the film’s tonal imbalance, the disrespect with which it treats its protagonist, and director Jasmeet K. Reen’s under-confident handling of some very intense ideas. We also discuss why rape-revenge films are morally thorny, and how Vijay Varma is a...

JugJugg Jeeyo —the new Dharma movie starring Varun Dhawan, Kiara Advani, Anil Kapoor, and Neetu Kapoor—is in constant conflict with itself. Is it a comedy or a drama? Does it want to portray emotionally evolved modern characters, or does it want to be a slapstick Govinda film from the ‘90s? Does it really want to expose patriarchal mindsets, or does it want to devote its entire runtime t...

Yet another big-budget stinker from Netflix, The Gray Man —the new film from Avengers: Endgame directors Joe and Anthony Russo—is so anonymous, it’s like it was literally birthed by an algorithm. We discuss The Gray Man ’s utter lack of personality, the incoherent action sequences, and deathly dull plotting. We also talk about how it assembles some of the world’s most talented movie stars—Ryan Gos...