The Lizard Review

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In determining your taste in music, what you HATE is almost as important as what you LOVE...after many many years of considering it, I've finally decided what my least favorite era in the history of music is - we talk about WHAT I hate about it, what artists were the biggest offenders, and also, what I didn't hate about it, and which songs and artists made the era bearable. This is a public episod...

This year's Grammy's is a STARK contrast to last year's Pop Girl Summit. The nominees this year, particularly in the Big Four, are far more dynamic and representative of music from all across the board. Who got snubbed, who got what they deserved, and WHO were the jumpscares that we never predicted being nominated...? Here's my reaction to all of the nominees in the major categories. This is a pub...

There's nothing as scary as female rage...HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thelizardreview.substack.com/subscribe

Gilmore Girls is one of my favorite shows of all time...and it also happens to be one of the most fall-coded shows ever created. We're FINALLLYYY doing Autumn behaviors on The Lizard Review and kicking it off STRONG with a semi-chaotic ranking of my twelve favorite Gilmore Girls episodes of all time, because some of these other people I've seen ranking episodes really need help... This is a public...

Insane sentence to have to type OR say in the year 2025...but alas, here we are. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thelizardreview.substack.com/subscribe

My trip abroad and beyond was filled with many happenstances including roaches, pizza, and a Polaroid to heal old wounds...but now that I'm finally back from a long workation, it's finally time to get myself back into the official mindset of SHOWGIRL. Shift with me back into Showgirl and Swiftie mode as we talk about the most recent developments in the world of the new record including the theatri...

In honor of there being a very huge pop record coming out in the next couple of weeks (I wonder to what I refer...) I decided to reflect on some of my favorite pop records of all time and also attempted to "rank" them, even though ranking is an evil word here on The Lizard Review. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit...

When a song is just soooo good you have to LIB OUT!!!!!!! Hayley Williams surprise released a 17-song confection with no official title on her website - it was completely contextless, and we all dove into the tracks not knowing quite what to expect : one of the absolute best ways to engage with new projects. The songs are full of twists and turns, different spheres of influence, multiple complexit...

Many might say that a "showgirl" is a very specific thing, and that you can't just walk around calling any celebrity you feel like a "showgirl..." here on The Lizard Review, I DO EXACTLY THAT!!!!!! In preparation for Taylor's new album The Life of a Showgirl, come with me on this mega episode as I talk about what exactly a showgirl is (or isn't) in my eyes, which albums and artists are the perfect...

One of the most compelling songs on the Tortured Poets Department happened to be the final song - a tale of women in history who have risen to prominence and fame and have experienced all of the wonderful and terrible things that go along with them. Clara Bow was an interesting enough song as its own, but with the reveal of The Life of a Showgirl being the next album, like Carrie Bradshaw I just s...

Will this year's MTV Video Music Awards be, as the kids say, a "flop summit"? Following a lukewarm eight months of music for 2024, one could say it wouldn't necessarily be surprising...breakdown all of the nominees for this year's award show with me, including some Taylor Swift ts12 predicting (of course) and some ranting and raving about how excessive lawn mowing is ruining the earth. THANK YOU!...

One of the most important rituals of any stan is the process of "ranking" things. Anything and everything. Outifts, albums, lead singles, cats, romantic partners, and, of course, songs. Judging by the title of the episode you may be thinking you are about to experience yet another one such ranking - from the top at number one, all the way to the bottom. Sadly, this is not the case. Consider this m...

A question that haunts every single person about at least one band or artist that they used to love : what happened? In the longest episode of The Lizard Review yet, I go through four different examples of four VERY different artists who all have only one thing in common - they once were considered great artists, and now no longer are. Some of them become cheesy, some of them sell out, some of the...

The latest in my series about the albums that made me into who I am - this is about an album that made me feel very far away from wherever I didn't want to be when I was a kid. It's an album that made me dream of beaches and oceans and piers and highways along the coast that I had never been to before, an album that made me feel like life was sunnier than it seemed, and most importantly, an album...

The 4th of July is many things...the most important is that it's a celebration of the day I got married, but the SECOND most important thing is that it's a celebration of the start of summertime. And what more perfect way to kick off summer than doing a lyrical analysis of Taylor Swift's best summer song - Cruel Summer. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers...

A lot of people seem to seriously, seriously think so. In this episode, I go into a biigggg discussion on why people feel that way, her newest song and album cover, and whether or not there's ANY credence to this claim whatsoever. PLUS : we get into Pitchfork's MISERABLY negative review of Benson Boone's newest album American Heart, and discuss a little bit of Addison Rae and a little bit of Jense...

Is love truly the only thing that can save us in the end? That is the question posed by the four songs we're comparing and contrasting today in this lyrical analysis - Guilty as Sin and Fresh Out The Slammer by Taylor Swift, and Stained Glass Window and Silver Ford by Sunday (1994.) What do these songs have in common? What does Taylor have in common with the band? How does their songwriting differ...

On a fateful autumn day this last September I encountered a brand new band who had only yet released a nine song EP. They were mysterious, different, talented, and had some of the most specific and interesting branding I've seen from any other bands I've discovered so far this decade. That nine song EP quickly jumped up to one of my most played albums of the year, so naturally when they went on to...

One of the most underrated and overlooked songs on Tortured Poets may actually be one that has the most to mine....a simple and admittedly childish metaphor is actually far more than it seems once you really start digging into the depths of this song and what it represents in the narrative of the album. Celebrate ONE YEAR of Tortured Poets on The Lizard Review by analyzing one of my favorite songs...

One of my all time favorite time periods of music had it all...the best boy bands and girl bands in history, some of the most iconic female pop stars of all time, iconic producers, and legendary iconography. It ALSO had misogyny, villainous men topping the charts, and beloved female pop stars punching one another backstage at the VMA's. Nonetheless, I love y2k, flaws and all, and I decided to (att...

Happiness is a butterfly...or is happiness a sunset? There will be happiness after you...or will it always escape from my hands into moonlight? Two different schools of thought on the same concept are presented by two of the most established and prolific female songwriters in the world - Lana Del Rey and Taylor Swift. On the one hand, Taylor Swift writes a full narrative of the five stages of grie...

Many of you are aware of my ritual of watching the new episode of Severance every Friday while eating a sandwich...nothing has ever been more important to me in the history of the world...and now that season two has officially concluded, there was no new Severance and no sandwich to be had...so I decided to bring Severance and Sandwich to the Lizard Review for a little bit of a kiki on my personal...

In the past five years, the number of truly great, iconic, and timeless pop ballads has dwindled significantly in comparison to years prior...WHERE ARE ALL THE GREAT POP BALLADS?!?!?!?!?! Join me as I struggle to answer this question, clarify what is NEEDED in order to create one of these iconic pop ballads, AND as I count down my personal top five GREATEST pop ballads ever created. Playlist on Sp...

SZA is one of the most innovative, unique, and talented artists working in music right now and she also happens to be one of my favorite artists as well. In this episode, come along with me and learn the basic fundamentals of engaging with SZA's music in the best possible way you can. Take Beyonce's advice and remove the barriers of genre from your mind, and soon, you will find yourself realizing...