Reading Cadence

Biographical dictionaries are pernicious ways the authors of said dictionary get you to read their roasts of people long dead who have no way of defending themselves. They’ll tear apart Philip Bailey (dead in 1902), but Rudyard Kipling they’ll leave alone because (at the time of that writing) he’s still alive! 0:00 - intro 2:10 - Dramatic Reading of Short Biographical Dictionary 30:09 - A (not so)...

Your existence, subsistence, no joke, essence can be rightly clarified and confirmed with a simple 8-termed word exploration! Do you exist or inexist? You can’t be too certain unless you have a handy-dandy thesaurus with you! 0:00 - intro 1:31 - Dramatic Reading of Thesaurus of English Words & Phrases 21:22 - A (not so) brief discussion Roget’s Thesaurus Of English Words And Phrases (1911) htt...

Have you ever spoken a joke aloud and NOBODY laughed at it? And then you have to go through the dutiful task of explaining it? So awkward! Well, this is a delightfully written satirical almanac from 1906 where home remedies and wives’ tales collide with some fantastic puns and humorous witticisms. 0:00 - intro 6:33 - Dramatic Reading of The Foolish Almanac (September) 16:35 - A (not so) brief disc...

Dubbed “a more boring Google” by one millennial, tune in to see what all the rage was about owning 29 volumes of an Encyclopedia Britannica in your home! 0:00 - intro 2:08 - Dramatic Reading of Labor Day to Labour Party 17:20 - A (not so) brief discussion Encyclopedia Brittanica 11th Edition (1911) https://www.gutenberg.org/files/41902/41902-h/41902-h.htm#ar16 This eBook is for the use of anyone a...

You main THINK you’re smart and sexy, but sorry bud, reality just kicked in. It’s not just a mental block. Tune in to find out how you can attain the freedom you need. 0:00 - intro 1:42 - Dramatic Reading of As A Matter of Course 22:26 - A (not so) brief discussion As A Matter Of Course by Annie Payson Call (1894) https://www.gutenberg.org/files/4385/4385-h/4385-h.htm#chap04 This eBook is for the...

As much as I care about your ear follicles, I care about your nostril tubes with an equal efficacy. If you’re questioning your baby’s proper breathing techniques and whether or not you’re sniffing the right substances, this is episode is sure to get you sneezing! 0:00 - intro 0:54 - Dramatic Reading of Nostril-Breathing vs. Mouth-Breathing 12:08 - A (not so) brief discussion The Hindu-Yogi Science...

Not surprisingly, a lot of people experience sleeplessness. And the author of this chapter wants you to know you won’t die from insomnia. But surprisingly, I meaninglessly put on a stethescope and lab coat that you cannot see to portray a stereotypical doctor. Why? Because sleeplessness just got a little more complicated and I wanted you to think I’m an expert in the subject. 0:00 - Intro 0:56 - D...

Mark your calendars down in red! It’s Episode 100 of Reading Cadence! I’ve been infecting your listening holes for almost two ears (er…I mean years) and didn’t want it to creep up silently! 0:00 - Dramatic Reading of The Masque Of The Red Death 21:28 - Remarks on Episode 100 The Masque Of The Red Death by Edgar Allan Poe (1842) https://www.gutenberg.org/files/1064/1064-h/1064-h.htm This eBook is f...

Take a deep breath and breathe in that fresh air…er….not TOO deep. You’ve got to make sure you don’t have to consult your health care provider’s Evidence of Coverage (EOC) manual for breathing in a strain of the flu! I love exploring these mazes of bureaucracy! 0:00 - Intro 4:35 - On scammers and conspiracy theories 5:52 - Section 13: Clerical Errors 7:00 - Section 2: Definitions 10:19 - Section 7...

What is truth? Why do you exist? Welcome to the wonderful world of philosophy! 0:00 - intro 1:09 - Dramatic Reading of Common Ideas On The History Of Philosophy 24:16 - A (not so) brief discussion Common Ideas On The History Of Philosophy by Georg Hegel (1816) https://www.gutenberg.org/files/51635/51635-h/51635-h.htm#c10 This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with almost no re...

The audacity of a person in 1896 to suggest that journalism maintain the highest degree of fidelity to uphold a reliable name in current events provides a timely word of wisdom to the “overseers of the Internet” today. Okay, Google…how do you define “internet accountability?” 0:00 - intro 2:13 - Dramatic Reading of An Editorial Retrospect 25:44 - A (not so) brief discussion An Editorial Retrospect...

Hey. British people love corn, too! Just not the type of corn you’re thinking about. Welcome to this corny episode! And I really hope I didn’t grossly misrepresent the basic economic principles of logic. I apologize to economists everywhere for the words I spoke about the subject, if so. 0:00 - intro 2:22 - Dramatic Reading of Corn Laws 39:03 - A (not so) brief discussion Corn Laws A Speech Delive...

Prepare to be smacked in the face with this speech by the very talented relationship therapist and addictions counselor, Patrick Henry! 247 years later, have we learned from our past? 0:00 - intro 2:25 - Dramatic Reading of Give Me Liberty Or Give Me Death 11:42 - A (not so) brief discussion Give Me Liberty Or Give Me Death! By Patrick Henry (1775) https://gutenberg.org/files/6/6-h/6-h.htm This eB...

What is the end goal of the world? Are we just a by-product of random chance that has no potential for improvement and growth? Obviously, not, but people just feel the need to accelerate the “evolution” of man through technology all the same. There’s nothing like a pebble to humble you and put you in your place. 0:00 - intro 1:13 - Dramatic Reading of A Strange Adventure Of A Pebble 31:13 - A (not...

Wouldn’t it be nice if we humans all were marked for death with as plain of indicator as the death of lakes? That way we could tell who we should dedicate healthcare resources to, and who we shouldn’t. Just a thought. Oh yeah, and we should rename Lake Michigan, Lake Wisconsin since Wisconsin is clearly the superior state. 0:00 - intro 1:08 - Dramatic Reading of A Strange Adventure Of A Pebble 29:...

Our pseudo-Wisconsinite pebble journeys into the magical realm of fairies to give Phil a primer on hen incubation and show how metamorphic rock naturally evolves! 0:00 - intro 1:14 - Dramatic Reading of A Strange Adventure Of A Pebble 31:28 - A (not so) brief discussion The Strange Adventures Of A Pebble by Hallam Hawksworth (1921) https://www.gutenberg.org/files/66818/66818-h/66818-h.htm This eBo...

Tracking a pebble’s adventures throughout Earth’s history suddenly makes owning a pet rock a more tantalizing experience. It appears this pebble will appear in all 7 continents…except for Antarctica. Because let’s face it: No one cares about Antarctica. 0:00 - intro 1:30 - Dramatic Reading of A Strange Adventure Of A Pebble 28:08 - A (not so) brief discussion The Strange Adventures Of A Pebble by...

There’s nothing quite like reading about snow as a native Midwesterner at the end of May! From dumping snow in the Boston harbor to incorporating flame throwers, what are some good ways to clean up snow? Perhaps the comment section of a 2009 blog will have a palatable solution. 0:00 - intro 3:57 - Dramatic Reading of Dirty Dustbins & Sloppy Streets 23:09 - A (not so) brief discussion Dirty Dus...

From trash dealers to landfills, home refuse disposal transformed the landscape of England, the ocean, and the entire world’s thinking on sanitation. I don’t think I would be spoiling anything to mention that the US is home to world’s largest landfill. Go US! 0:00 - intro 2:59 - Dramatic Reading of Dirty Dustbins & Sloppy Streets (Ch. 3) 26:21 - A (not so) brief discussion Dirty Dustbins &...

Could Canada be to blame for our current state of environmental discord in the sanitation department? In the spirit of all good politicians, we must blame another country or person instead of taking personal responsibility for our actions. Oh, yeah. This is an episode about trash cans and dump trucks. Weird. 0:00 - intro 4:54 - Dramatic Reading of Dirty Dustbins & Sloppy Streets (Ch. 3) 14:41...

Yes! Could a beacon of hope…a symbol of trash heroism…a person of the people finally be found at last? The chosen one of the sanitation industry may be a dark knight after all! You be the judge. 0:00 - intro 2:46 - Dramatic Reading of Dirty Dustbins & Sloppy Streets (Ch. 2) 10:25 - Dramatic Reading of Dirty Dustbins & Sloppy Streets (Ch. 4) 24:22 - A (not so) Brief Discussion Dirty Dustbin...

I don’t normally get so worked up about trash, but the slander of some people in besmirching the name of Gus and small businesses took me over the edge. Give trash some dignity again! 0:00 - intro 2:31 - Dramatic Reading of Dirty Dustbins & Sloppy Streets (Ch. 1) 10:12 - Dramatic Reading of Dirty Dustbins & Sloppy Streets (Ch. 10) 15:56 - A (not so) Brief Discussion Dirty Dustbins & Sl...

Valuable life lessons are learned today: How to not get your new-found spouse killed. Totally unrelated: A brief primer on strangulation. 0:00 - intro 2:31 - Dramatic Reading of Frankenstein 23:52 - A (not so) Brief Discussion Frankenstein or, the Modern Prometheus by Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley (1818) https://www.gutenberg.org/files/84/84-h/84-h.htm This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at...

Was Frankenstein’s act of creation a mistake so much so that he should never considering creating again? The answer actually gives off one of those embarrassing “gotcha” moments if you just stop and think about it for a second or 480! 0:00 - intro 1:33 - Dramatic Reading of Frankenstein 16:16 - A (not so) Brief Discussion Frankenstein or, the Modern Prometheus by Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley (1818)...

When the presumably savage, uncivil, and barbaric monster starts making more sense than the presumably humane, civil, mature Frankenstein, it causes you to question the premise on who really is the monster in this situation! Good stuff! 0:00 - intro 2:29 - Dramatic Reading of Frankenstein 23:06 - A (not so) Brief Discussion Frankenstein or, the Modern Prometheus by Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley (181...