Flip Your Mindset

In 1989, Stacy Schaffer was 11 years old. She was an A-student, a perfectionist, and on the surface, she looked “fine.” But at home, she was hiding in a closet. She was surviving the silence of sexual abuse she had tried to report but wasn’t believed. Her mother, battling her own demons and illness, didn’t know how to handle a child who was internally collapsing. So, she paid four men $100 to come...

My guest on the Flip Your Mindset podcast this week, Angie Hawkins, has done things most of us only see in movies. She’s jumped out of helicopters Navy Seal style. She’s bungee jumped off cliffs. And yet, as she told me, she was still terrified of being truly seen . How can both of these things be true? How can someone be so physically brave yet so internally frightened? The answer, as we explored...

Today’s episode of Flip Your Mindset is one of those conversations that sits with you, one that changes the way you see the systems we trust. My guest is Lisa Ramos , a doctoral candidate and the founder of the Trauma-Informed Care Institute. Her story begins with a parent’s absolute worst nightmare: watching her child fight for her life in the ICU. In 2015, her 15-month-old daughter was exposed t...

Have you ever found yourself nodding along in therapy, intellectually understanding every single word, analyzing your past, identifying your patterns... yet still feeling utterly stuck ? Still battling that familiar anxiety? Still catching yourself people-pleasing or abandoning your own needs? If so, you are not alone. And you are not failing at therapy. The truth, as I discovered in my latest con...

Have you ever had one of those days where a small inconvenience feels like a personal attack on your sanity? Maybe a spilled coffee sends a jolt of rage through you. A mildly critical email from your boss makes you spiral into self-doubt for hours. Or a simple change of plans from a friend feels like a massive, day-ruining betrayal. You know, logically, that your reaction feels bigger than the sit...

What if I told you that emotional stress could be lowering your IQ? It’s a startling thought, but it points to a deeper issue many of us face. According to one staggering statistic, 75% of successful professionals feel misaligned , even when they appear to be thriving on the outside. For many, chasing a version of success that isn’t their own has led to a crisis of burnout, stress, and anxiety. Th...

Have you ever felt like you’re running into the same invisible walls in your life? Maybe it’s in your relationships, where you keep finding yourself in the same dynamic over and over. Maybe it’s a constant, humming anxiety you can’t quite explain. Or maybe it’s just a persistent feeling of being ‘stuck,’ like you’re paddling as hard as you can, but the current keeps pulling you back. If any of tha...

When people ask about your childhood, do you find yourself saying something like, “Oh, it was fine,” or “It was good, I guess. I had everything I needed…”? On the surface, it’s true. There was food on the table, a roof over your head, and no big, overt traumas to point to. Yet, deep down, there’s a part of you that feels like something was missing. You might carry a persistent feeling of emptiness...

Is It Your Personality, or a Survival Tactic? Uncovering the hidden 80% of your mind that dictates your success. We all have a story we tell ourselves about who we are. "I'm a perfectionist," "I'm a workaholic," "I'm just someone who avoids the spotlight." We treat these traits as fixed parts of our personality, the fundamental building blocks of us. But what if they aren't? In a recent fascinatin...

Hey everyone, Have you ever felt like you're constantly "on alert," carrying a heavy, invisible backpack you can't seem to put down? That underlying hum of anxiety, the one that whispers in the background even when everything logically seems okay? If so, you're not alone. And I’m here to tell you something truly important: it’s not your fault. For years, I lived with what I now call "high-function...

I'm usually the one asking the questions. As the host of a podcast, I guide my guests through their stories. But recently, I felt compelled to share my own. I handed the microphone over to an expert I deeply respect, Dr. Veronique Mead of the Chronic Illness Trauma Studies blog, and became the guest on my own show. I needed to talk about my journey—a journey that led to three different autoimmune...

The Invisible Backpack You Can't Put Down Let me guess something about your daily experience. You feel constantly on alert, waiting for the other shoe to drop. You know logically that you're safe, but your body is telling you a completely different story. You're exhausted from carrying what I call the "Invisible Backpack"—this weight you can't seem to put down, no matter how hard you try. And here...

Picture this: You're in the middle of an argument with your partner, and suddenly you hear words coming out of your mouth that sound eerily familiar. Not because you've said them before, but because you've heard them before. Maybe it's your mother's sharp tone, or your father's way of shutting down when things get heated. In that moment, you realize you're not just you—you're carrying someone else...

We need to talk about trauma. When most people hear that word, they think of an event . A big, scary, obvious moment that takes us off guard and leaves us feeling unsafe. And yes, an event can certainly be traumatic. But it’s my mission for you to understand this: the event comes and goes. It ends. The trauma is what happens after. It’s the unhealed wound. It's the way your nervous system adjusts...

For anyone who has felt that familiar, dreaded sensation—the racing heart, the tight chest, the mind spiraling into a thousand worst-case scenarios—the immediate instinct is to fight it. To push it down, wish it away, and get it to the curb. We treat anxiety like a relentless enemy, a bug in our system that we need to eradicate. For 30 years, I felt the exact same way. My "ride or die at the contr...

Have you ever had a moment in your day or your life where you’ve thought, "I just don't have the bandwidth for this"?. It’s a common feeling—the sense that your capacity to cope is completely spent. But what if this isn't a personal failing, but a physiological signal from your nervous system? This is the core idea behind the "Window of Tolerance," a concept developed by Stephen Porges that provid...

Do you know the feeling? A chest that’s always a little too tight. A mind that races, replaying conversations and planning for threats that haven’t happened yet. Maybe it’s a constant, low hum of anxiety that you’ve carried for so long it feels like part of your personality. Or maybe it’s the opposite: a heavy, foggy exhaustion where nothing brings you pleasure and you feel like you’re "swimming t...

Ever feel like you're living a life based on someone else's script? Like there's a disconnect between who you are and who you feel you should be? If so, you're in for a treat with our latest "Flip Your Mindset" episode featuring the incredible Donna Parker. Donna, a seasoned therapist, life coach, educator, and speaker with over 25 years in the mental health field, is the founder of Evolve Coachin...

In our latest podcast episode, we ventured into a profound conversation that bridges the clinical with the spiritual, the personal with the universal. Joined by the insightful Jesseca Banchy, a former ICU nurse turned holistic healer, we explored the complex landscape of trauma, our innate capacity for joy, and the transformative power of self-awareness. Jesseca Banchy, drawing from her unique per...

The Invisible Scar: Unpacking Betrayal Trauma with Mr. Jay Welcome to a new deep dive from Flip Your Mindset, where we don't shy away from the tough conversations that truly impact our lives. In our latest episode, I had the privilege of sitting down with Mr. Jay , a certified betrayal trauma practitioner and intra-personal relationship coach, whose insights into the silent suffering of betrayal t...

On the latest episode of "Flip Your Mindset," I had the immense pleasure of sitting down with Susan Shofer, a powerhouse of knowledge and experience in a field that is, unfortunately, all too necessary: high-conflict divorce and parental alienation. This isn't just another conversation about divorce; this is a deep dive into the strategic, emotional, and often traumatic landscape that many, partic...

Of all the topics we’ve explored over the years on the podcast, there's one we’ve never truly dissected, yet it silently dictates so much of our lives: money. It’s a subject often shrouded in shame and secrecy, but its influence is everywhere, in our relationships, our careers, and our sense of well-being. What if I told you that your financial habits, whether you’re a meticulous saver, an anxious...

Hi everyone, it's Stacey Uhrig. I'm thrilled to share the final installment of my Flip Your Mindset podcast series featuring the incredible Kimberly Weeks. In this deeply personal episode, Kimberly and I dive into the complex issue of narcissistic abuse and coercive control, exploring how these toxic dynamics extend far beyond intimate relationships. Throughout my conversations with Kimberly, a Ce...

When we think of abuse, our minds often go straight to physical violence. Bruises, threats, raised voices, broken things. But some of the deepest, most enduring wounds are invisible. They don’t leave scars on the skin. They live in the nervous system. They warp your perception of reality. They bury your voice. This is coercive control. And it is central to narcissistic abuse. In this episode, I si...

When Kimberly and I wrapped Episode 3, we thought that was it. We had laid the foundation: what narcissistic abuse looks like, why it’s so hard to leave, and the trauma that keeps survivors stuck in cycles of confusion and guilt. We closed the conversation… and then we looked at each other and said, “It’s not over.” Because the truth is, it never ends at awareness. It doesn't even end at leaving....