Coming Back: Conversations on life after loss

In the midst of coronavirus, life is anxious, overwhelming, and terribly uncertain. I'm sharing a quick mindfulness meditation you can use in the face of the unknown. Plus, I'm announcing the next session of my 12-week online course, Life After Loss Academy. Join me May 4, 2020 for a 12-week online course that will help you feel safe in the world again, say goodbye to "the perfect griever," and lo...

When she was just 17 years old, Frankie Orella lost her mom to breast cancer. Her religious community was less than helpful and while she remained a part of the church, Frankie also looked to music and songwriting to "speak" to the pain of her loss. Her latest endeavor is a series of songs based on Elisabeth Kubler-Ross's Five Stages of Grief. Today, we're talking about becoming comfortable with t...

Kim Peacock watched her daughter fall off a cliff to her death while on a family vacation in 1998. A joyful event instantly became a nightmare as she wrestled with her religious foundations and her need to know "WHY?". This week, we're talking about the grief of the empty room when a child dies, the prayer Kim and her husband said to keep them from "the pit," and why grieving is not a sign that yo...

Comedian, nurse, and ex-nun Kelli Dunham had two partners die in her arms within the course of five years. You might think she's cursed, but she sees it a little differently. Join Kelli and I as we discuss the role of humor in grief, why finding meaning doesn't make grief magically "go away," and what it's like to be the partner of someone who's chosen to die by medically-assisted death (also know...

At the age of six, Tammy Faulds was diagnosed with cancer. Her yearly visits to an oncology office are a regular reminder that she's going to die one day, and before that happens, she wants to live a life she's proud of. This week, Tammy and I are talking about how Western society equates death with failure, how we can use our own mortality and our deathbed regrets as motivators to live how we act...

Gabrielle Valdes is a former hopeless romantic on a quest to help others live better by learning to love better. On this breakup + relationship geared episode, we're talking about how romanticizing grief keeps us isolated, why the grief of betrayal and loss of trust hurt so much, and how to navigate the strange world of ambiguous loss—in other words, grieving someone who is still alive. Gabrielle'...

In her book Extra Helping, Janet Reich Elsbach shares the beauty and bounty of receiving through food. This week, we're talking about how to slow down and be more present while caregiving, how to stop tying receiving to "weakness" or "inability," why food politics surrounding chemo, cancer, and health have no place in the meal train, and how food has the incredible power to give us our humanity ba...

Stephenie Zamora was on top of the world until the sudden suicide of her recent ex-boyfriend brought it all crashing down. Her new book Unravel takes grievers deep into the world of loving and grieving people who abuse us, understanding traumatic grief as a major root cause of PTSD, and recognizing that grief totally turns everything from our work to our friendships upside-down and inside-out. Ste...

How often have you felt HEARD, I mean REALLY HEARD in your grief? Michael Sorensen is the author of I Hear You and we're talking about the tool of emotional validation i.e. helping people feel heard and understood. This week, we'll touch on why we're all starving for validation, how to get friends and family to really hear us instead of trying to fix us, and what to do when it feels like listening...

Her TED Talk has a disclaimer because it's so controversial! What happens when we're happy, joyful, or even at peace when our loved one dies? Jennifer Mathews is expanding what it means to grieve because when her partner died from cancer she did not grieve in the traditional way. We're talking about the cultural myths that make death and grief more painful, how to connect with "that which never di...

When her three-and-a-half-year-old-son, Koa, died suddenly in a home accident, Victoria Markham was thrust into the world of grief. Her documentary RE:MEMBER is an inside look at working with the beauty and pain of grief. Today, we're talking about releasing guilt associated with the death of a loved one, avoiding cultural appropriation in grief rituals, and how grief shows up… even years and year...

What would happen if we gave kids space and support to grieve? This week, I'm talking to Jana DeCristofaro from the Dougy Center for Grieving Children and Families. We're discussing why repeating the facts of what happened is often necessary for kids, why you might consider making a scrapbook or written story of a child's grief, and how those of us who are childless/child-free can support the grie...

Religion is a touchy subject in grief. But for some like Joanne Fink, it's the touchstone for their coming back. Joanne Fink's work, books, cards, and Caremojis: https://zenspirations.com/ https://whenyoulosesomeone.com/ Season 8 of Coming Back premieres January 1, 2020! In the meantime... Enter to win one of three scholarships to Life After Loss Academy by entering your email address here: http:/...

What would happen if we saw mental illness through the same lens as physical illness? Bipolar advocate Emily Washcovick riffs on the validity of mental illness as REAL illness. Emily Washcovick's work: https://www.bipolarbroughtbalance.com/ Season 8 of Coming Back premieres January 1, 2020! In the meantime... Enter to win one of three scholarships to Life After Loss Academy by entering your email...

There's no skeletons, black lipstick, or bats here! There's a perception that grief and death are morbid… but Alua Arthur and I are turning that myth on its head. Alua Arthur's work: http://www.goingwithgrace.com/ Season 8 of Coming Back premieres January 1, 2020! In the meantime... Enter to win one of three scholarships to Life After Loss Academy by entering your email address here: http://www.sh...

What if we were just humans doing the human thing? Sarah Nannen and I are talking about listening and being present. Sarah Nannen's book, podcast, and work: https://www.sarahnannen.com/meditation Season 8 of Coming Back premieres January 1, 2020! In the meantime... Enter to win one of three scholarships to Life After Loss Academy by entering your email address here: http://www.shelbyforsythia.com/...

You're not supposed to compare your griefs with the griefs of others. But can you compare your griefs to each other? Rachel Whalen and I say YES. Rachel Whalen's work: https://unexpectedfamilyouting.com/ Season 8 of Coming Back premieres January 1, 2020! In the meantime... Enter to win one of three scholarships to Life After Loss Academy by entering your email address here: http://www.shelbyforsyt...

Join me January 1, 2020 for a 12-week online course that will help you feel safe in the world again, say goodbye to "the perfect griever," and love the person loss has forced you to become. Enroll now:  http://shelbyforsythia.thinkific.com/courses/life-after-loss-academy In the meantime... Enter to win one of three scholarships to Life After Loss Academy by entering your email address here: http:/...

Artist Joanne Fink lost her husband suddenly to a heart attack in 2011. Of course, he was more than just her husband; Andy was her business partner, IT director, and the person who held down the fort when she went to trade shows and client meetings. This week, we're talking about the sudden need to take on spousal roles when a partner dies, Joanne's perspective on sympathy greeting cards, and how...

In just three years, Rachel Reichblum lost both of her parents to the SAME TYPE OF BRAIN CANCER. Really… what are the odds? Today we're talking about living in survival mode vs. thriving mode, why it's necessary to "shelve spirituality" for a while after loss, and the immense pressure to find purpose and meaning after people we love have died. Plus, I'm talking about the things you do not have per...

Thirteen years ago, Kristine Carlson's husband was on a routine business trip when he died on a flight. The author of Don't Sweat the Small Stuff, Dr. Richard Carlson was—and still is—remembered in very public ways. This week, Kristine and I are talking about not getting the luxury of saying goodbye, dealing with the fear of being sucked under by sorrow, and the wild, impossible interaction Kristi...

One year ago, Kristen Meinzer suddenly lost her job. She was left with questions, grief, and the inevitable identity struggle that job loss produces. Today, we're talking about what to DO in the aftermath of sudden loss (and why Kristen embraces being a do-aholic), the difference between forced gratitude and practiced gratitude, and what Dolly Parton and Pollyanna have to do with grief! Also this...

Her first manic episode and hospitalization in October 2018 absolutely changed the way Emily Washcovick saw herself. Today, she's launching Bipolar Brought Balance to slay the stigma surrounding mental health and add her voice to the growing community of mental health advocates. This week, we're talking about regaining trust in yourself after things fall apart, how it's never the JOB of grieving p...

In eight years, Miami Knight lost her dad, her sister, and her son. A serendipitous vision board party plus a continued conversation with god brought her to a place where she actively chose and decided to come back. Today, we're talking about how we can visualize a different reality in the aftermath of loss, how loss of faith is like falling out of love with god, and why Miami is on a mission to e...

"Soldier on" was Hope Edelman's coping method for the sudden death of her mother until seven years later, a broken engagement brought her mother's death roaring to the surface. Hope started writing her New York Times Bestseller Motherless Daughters as a way to comprehend her loss and connect with other motherless daughters. Today we're talking about how death makes us crave truth and clarity, why...