Confidence Matters

This is the final post in October’s Self-Respect theme. Week 1 - You Don’t Have to Love Yourself to Respect Yourself Week 2 - I t Took a While to Realise All the Ways I had Abandoned Myself Week 3 - You Don’t Need Anyone’s Permission to Respect Yourself Week 4 - When Self-Respect Becomes a Way of Life At the beginning of October, I suggested that you don’t have to love yourself to respect yourself...

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This is the fourth post in October’s Self-Respect theme. Week 1 - You Don’t Have to Love Yourself to Respect Yourself Week 2 - I t Took a While to Realise All the Ways I had Abandoned Myself Week 3 - You Don’t Need Anyone’s Permission to Respect Yourself When I committed to rebuilding my confidence, I needed to confront the shame I carried. My life felt like a mess. I was drinking too much, moving...

This is the third post in October’s Self-Respect theme. Week 1 - You Don’t Have to Love Yourself to Respect Yourself Week 2 - I t Took a While to Realise All the Ways I had Abandoned Myself “How many Christmas cards have you had?” That’s a very simple question, so why did it make me feel so uncomfortable? At the time, it was normal for people to send Christmas cards to family and friends. They als...

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This is the second post in October’s Self-Respect theme. Week 1 - You Don’t Have to Love Yourself to Respect Yourself I always treat myself with love and kindness. It is one of my rules. Years ago, after the final of three abusive relationships ended, I made a commitment not to let anyone treat me badly again. That commitment had to include me. One of the difficult questions I needed to ask myself...

Our theme for October is Self-Respect. “I don’t know if I love myself.” I have heard that many times from clients. There was a time when I already knew my answer. I didn’t love myself. I didn’t think I was a nice person. I got into bad relationships, drank too much and didn’t take proper care of myself. Was that how you treat someone you love? Today, my answer is very different. I love myself. I k...

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This is the final post in this months theme of building confidence. Week 1 - All I Wanted Was to Be Susan’s Friend and to Own a Pony Week 2- I Didn’t Only Build My Confidence, I Uncovered Who I Was Week 3 - If You Wait Until You Are Confident, You Will Never Take the Leap I started this month wanting Susan to choose me. I end with the realisation that I can choose myself. Carla was super confident...

This is the third post in this months theme of building confidence. Week 1 - All I Wanted Was to Be Susan’s Friend and to Own a Pony Week 2- I Didn’t Only Build My Confidence, I Uncovered Who I Was For much of my life, I didn’t feel good enough. I was a high achiever who felt like an imposter. So working in a career where league tables rated performance was ideal. I could see where I stood compare...

This is the second post in this months theme of building confidence. Week 1 - All I Wanted Was to Be Susan’s Friend and to Own a Pony I was in a dark place, looking for a light to guide me. In that moment, I felt I had a choice. Stay a victim and keep spiralling down. Or get back on my feet and become my own hero. I decided to stand up. That’s when I committed to building my confidence. One of my...

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If I met Susan today, fifty-four years after she crushed me, I wonder whether she would even remember me. I doubt it, but I remember her. I would ask her why she asked me to share a bunk bed with her on a school trip, only to dump me at the last minute for another girl. Did she know what that did to my confidence and self-esteem? Did she care? Susan was in my class at school, and she was the kind...

This is the fourth and final post in the August theme of flourishing. Week 1 - I Thought Flourishing Was Only for the Most Successful People Week 2 - I Find Myself Enjoying the Passage of Time Week 3 - We Flourish When Every Moment Matters I will build my confidence. Those five words changed my life. They really did. That was the commitment I made to myself after three abusive relationships over m...

This is the third article for our August theme of ‘Flourishing’. Week 1 - I Thought Flourishing Was Only for the Most Successful People Week 2 - I Find Myself Enjoying the Passage of Time Have you ever noticed how present dogs are? You could have been gone for five minutes, and your dog greets you as if it’s been five months. Dogs live in a world where every moment matters. Humans aren’t quite so...

This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit suereid.substack.com/subscribe

This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit suereid.substack.com/subscribe

This is the second article for our August theme of ‘Flourishing’. Week 1 - I Thought Flourishing Was Only for the Most Successful People To flourish, we need to be present. We can remember the past and look ahead to the future, but life itself is happening here, in this moment. In the 1977 song ‘Secret O’Life’, James Taylor wrote ‘ The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time’. Taylor is tal...

This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit suereid.substack.com/subscribe

This is the first article for our August theme of ‘Flourishing’. I never thought I would flourish. When I first heard the word flourishing , I imagined someone living an extraordinary life. Someone who was always happy, hugely successful, endlessly confident, and completely at peace. That didn’t sound like me. However, this year, as I have reflected on confidence and written about self-trust and a...

This is the final post for our July theme of alignment. If you missed the first four, you can read or listen to them here: Week 1 - It Is Hard Being Someone You Are Not Week 2- The Quiet Whisper That Tells You What You Need, Want and Value Week 3 - Living in Alignment, One Choice at a Time Week 4 - The Day You Stop Thinking About Alignment, and It Becomes a Way of Life What was wrong with me? On t...

This is the fourth post for our July theme of alignment. If you missed the first three, you can read or listen to them here: Week 1 - It Is Hard Being Someone You Are Not Week 2- The Quiet Whisper That Tells You What You Need, Want and Value Week 3 - Living in Alignment, One Choice at a Time Living in alignment can sometimes feel hard. You’ve learned to trust yourself. You’re beginning to hear you...

This is the third post for our July theme of alignment. If you missed the first two, you can read or listen to them here: Week 1 - It Is Hard Being Someone You Are Not Week 2- The Quiet Whisper That Tells You What You Need, Want and Value People often ask me how I became so confident. When I was younger, I was shy and afraid to speak. They want to know what changed. The truth is there wasn’t one b...

This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit suereid.substack.com/subscribe

This is the second post for our July theme of alignment. If you missed the first, you can read or listen to it here: Week 1 - It Is Hard Being Someone You Are Not Is there someone you completely trust to make your decisions for you? A few years ago, I met Jay, a young woman in her 20s who was living with her partner. She was bright and outgoing, quite an extrovert, in fact. She had never felt comf...