Childproof

Parenting via email. That’s what the podcast is now. And this episode covers chalk-covered mascots, a discussion on if we love our kids enough, when is the right time to have a baby (and no, neither of us is pregnant. Both of us are fixed, thank you.), and when and how to work through big feelings with your kids.  We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else y...

On this episode of Childproof: Parasocial Parenting we discuss mushroom allergies, mascots that are not in any way shape or form mascots but Gwenna nicknames everything inappropriately, and how toddlers and teenagers are alike but different. Also we discuss how gentle parenting doesn’t mean never being mean. It just means being mean with purpose and intent and realizing that your kids can be mad e...

The start of summer means more kids everywhere. If your kids aren’t in school yet you have no sympathy. We understand. But ours are home and we love them very much and miss quiet things and alone time. Two things can be true. This episode we talk about acceptable risks, overprotecting, sticker books, a dog dressed as a butterfly, and projects and assignments neither Tori nor Gwenna have done.  We...

This week on Childproof’s Parasocial Parenting we’re talking about uniforms for motherhood (Spoiler: There isn’t one.), Gwenna’s pathological demand avoidance about a webtoon, Mom RBF, realistic expectations of becoming an adult, planning for the near future and letting forever take care of itself. If you’d like to influence us email us at childproofmail@gmail.com We want to hear from you! Do you...

Tori and Gwenna are very much enjoying and appreciating all of your emails and comments; keep them coming and we'll keep this going. Also, watch The Amazing Digital Circus and then try to convince Gwenna to watch too. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon for pre-show bonus conten...

Childproof is changing for the better because it will now include more of all of you! We have always loved hearing from all of you and reading your emails. We want to hear from you more now than ever. It's not like every episode is going to be an email roundup, it's more like an extension of the virtual village and we are so excited to share more than our own thoughts. We want to hear from you! Do...

Yet another episode sponsored in part by MacMillan Audio because they produced Gwenna’s latest book, Thinky Thoughts All Grown Up & Still Just as Confused. You can listen to the full version come April 14th but for now, please enjoy just one more essay. This one is road rage and involves bricks, land boats, cloud-haired women in sensible shoes, and the root of a good chunk of Gwenna’s car-based an...

This episode of Childproof is sponsored in part by MacMillan Audio. Gwenna’s new book Thinky Thoughts hits shelves April 14th and MacMillan Audio produced her audiobook. Gwenna will read her own book to you. And you get a sample here on Childproof. Enjoy this complete essay Creamed Corn from Thinky Thoughts: All Grown Up & Still Just as Confused. Is creamed corn a thinly veiled reference to grown...

It’s time for another round of enjoying our mutual parasocial relationships with our listeners! We’ve asked you questions. You’ve answered them. We’re reading some of them. And then using your answers to explore tangents that may or may not have anything to do with anything.  At the end of every episode we invite you to email us with questions, suggestions, or things we should know. We shamelessly...

After a pause. And a break. And a distinct lack of explaining ourselves. And another break. We’re back. This time with an explanation of exactly what happened. The winds of change are blowing and we’re excited to see where they take us all! We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us: Childproofmail@gmail.com ⁠Join our Patreon fo...

On this episode of Childproof Gwenna and Tori discuss things. Okay, full disclosure for the seventeen people that read notes and descriptions, we recorded this and then Oklahoma and Kentucky both exploded with influenza. Everyone was sick. Stuff got paused while we all healed. It was rough. No one had any fun. Show notes didn’t get written and by the time they got back to it Gwenna, who writes the...

Tori only thought they were losing it. Their snow continues and we decided to scour the internet for what they are saying about parents in the media. Did you know Warren Buffett was a gentle parent? Who knew? And then we spend most of the rest of the episode being very millennial and complaining about a Buzzfeed article. It’s not so much complaining as pointing out how it’s wrong a bunch. So like...

White people talking about the weather, weird Barbies, transmogrifying spoons, fork licking, crutches, clutter, hoarding, and lying. Somehow that’s all in this episode. Tori and Gwenna have gone stir crazy I. The ale of the winter storm that swept the nation and this episode is the proof of that.  We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to kno...

January is still here. Because it won’t leave. Why won’t it leave? Why does every January seem to last five years? On this episode of childproof Gwenna and Tori discuss snow days and library perks. Art contests and alarm clocks. But mostly we just keeping waiting for January to be done.  We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email u...

Okay yes fine. We admit it. Sometimes we make meals our whole families enjoy and sometimes we make five different dishes, one for each human in the house. We do it because we can. Because it’s not that hard. Because not every moment needs to be a teachable one. And sometimes just getting dinner down their gullet is worth not fighting an entire war over a dang pea. We also admit a whole bunch of ot...

The new year is always ripe with promise of change. But these changes were inevitable. On this episode of Childproof we’re talking books, baby fever (no neither of us are having more babies, relax) and how to handle body acceptance and changes to our bodies without making a negative change. Framing self improvement as just that. Improvement. We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comment...

It’s been a wonderful holiday break. We are spirited out though and looking forward to our spawn going and hanging out with other folks for a hot second. From grinning and bearing our kids’ tastes in media to when you’re forced to take your own parenting advice FOR yourself, returning to routine is important and this episode of Childproof really hammers that down.  We want to hear from you! Do you...

This is the episode that isn’t an episode but is made of parts of all the other episodes that were episodes even if they were weird episodes. A full episode of minisodes? Anyway Gwenna  and Tori are spending their holiday with their family and will have plenty to talk about after the break. Please enjoy this montage of our favorite clips and moments.  We want to hear from you! Do you have question...

It’s another preshow preview. And a montage. Who doesn’t love a montage? Yes we did one of these but we aren’t very good at planning and this one isn’t the same as the one a few months ago. Our Patrons and paid subscribers get these little treats served to them every week. It’s basically a FaceTime between Tori and I. We typically have to explain that folks should lower there expectation for what...

Winter break is upon us in the northern hemisphere. (Happy summer to our Southern Hemisphere listeners) We’ve got holidays and school breaks and kids everywhere. With so much to do there’s still somehow room for boredom. This podcast episode is full of boredom busters of all variety to not just survive the break but to thrive, enjoy your time, and keep everyone happily busy.  We want to hear from...

It’s the most wonderful time of the year. The time when we read your emails and chat. Gwenna and Tori have been asking listeners to share their favorite Christmas, holiday, and winter memories with us. For this email round up we share a selection of the hundreds of stories we received.  We want to hear from you! Do you have questions, comments, jokes, or anything else you want us to know? Email us...

What does it take to become an artist? How much are you standing in your own way? This week Tori and Gwenna welcome artist (and now author) Scott Christian Sava. Scott Sava is an artist, illustrator, and creator from Yonkers New York. His animated film Animal Crackers is on Netflix starring John Krasinski and an all-star cast. He’s worked on Spider Man Comics, Star Trek art, and The Dreamland Chro...

It’s the holiday season and tomorrow is Thanksgiving. Your friendly neighborhood podcasts hosts little bit forgot they’d be insanely busy in the lead up to Thanksgiving in the US. So you get a preshow run long. If you’re a former subscriber you’ll recognize this chaos for what it is. Tori and Gwenna being odd and barely having their ish together. From behind the scenes info to an in depth discussi...

The holidays can be hard. From schedules to budgets, magic to mayhem, there’s a lot. All the time. It feels like we kick a ball down the hill October first and then spend a full 120 days chasing it back down. How do you maintain that holiday spirit for the long haul? Should you or is that a more unrealistic expectation of perfection? And when everything feels heavy, how do you keep it light for th...

It turns out one episode of being mad wasn’t enough. We’re still mad but we are working through it. Anger isn’t taboo but it is hard to work with. Tori and Gwenna discuss the language they use to normalize all the big, heavy, negative emotions. It’s alright to feel frustrated but we don’t have to stay there. You’re right to be mad but is the mad helping or is it keeping you stuck.  We want to hear...