We're Having Gay Sex

This episode is lively, listener! Nico Carney is a comedian, writer, and actor, whose new hour-long special ‘WEE LAD’ is now out on Youtube. We discuss the genders TikTok commenters assign us, straight men with masculine wives, and facing uncertainty before transition. Jen’s parents accidentally see way too much of Ashley’s boobs, Nico shares an insightful story about confronting people from your...

This episode is a homecoming, listener! Kylie Vincent is back on the pod to discuss her recent MS diagnosis and new show, Lesion Lady. During our catch up we discuss being a white woman with a cane, what your Sims worlds say about your childhood, and the pros and cons of visible vs. invisible disabilities. Ashley gets into her own journey with disability and accommodations, Kylie discusses becomin...

This episode is double-trouble, listener! McKenzie Goodwin and Rachel Scanlon are the two hilarious hosts of the hit queer podcast Two Dykes and a Mic. We discuss their “lesbian hive mind,” phone sex with your spouse, celesbians, and the art of taking nudes at the airport. Ashley has sex that jump starts her period, Rachel’s best laid plans for a romantic night in are foiled, and McKenzie has a bi...

This episode is fascinating, listener! Kiel Tutin is a dancer, choreographer, and creative director who has been the visionary behind performances like BLACKPINK’s headlining Coachella set and The JLO Show: Live in Las Vegas. We discuss the policing of popstars, the perils (and benefits?) of reading the comments, and the joy that comes from seeing old people dance. Ashley’s plans get lost in trans...

This episode is WILD, listener! Madison Sinclair is a comedian, writer (Comedy Central’s Roasts of Kevin Hart, Whitney Cummings, and Bert Kreischer), and CEO of The Bummer Shop, which sells booty shorts with sad facts. We discuss being “the man” in a femme for femme relationship, doing comedy with (and for) your dog, and the crime of being gay in the NFL. Ashley fumbles a flirtatious audience memb...

Tensions are HIGH in this episode, listener! It’s a non-traditional WHGS family episode today, and it may be one of our most raw and emotional episodes to date… Joined by both our fantastic co-hosts and comedians Lizzy Cassidy and Ali Kolbert, it all gets laid bare: Ashley confronts Ali on why she’s so intimidating, Ali confronts Ashley on why she’s so intimidated, the room confronts Ashley and Je...

This episode is being BOLD, listener! Amelia Montooth is the founder and CEO of Mutuals Media — the people behind your favorite online queer content like “Gaydar” with Anania, but today she’s in the apartment to get behind YOU with a strap! We discuss starting threesomes with strangers at pride, initiating it inside a crowded Thai restaurant, changing relationship habits, starting Mutuals Media, a...

This episode is open and free, listener! Edy Modica (Jury Duty, Let’s Start a Cult) is a hilarious comedian, actor, and content creator that had you chuckling on one of the greatest TV shows of our current time, but now she’s on the couch to show something NASTIER on screen! We discuss having an open relationship dynamic with your boyfriend, using your arrangement to flash strangers on the interne...

This episode is surviving a crazy childhood, listener! Hannah Beck is a hilarious queer Chicago-based comedian and podcaster that’s performing at the biggest venues across the city, but today she’s in the apartment to escape the biggest CULTS in America. We discuss growing up in a crazy cult, escaping it through your gay bestie, the best ways to flirt as a lesbian, how to tell if you’re on a date,...

Get tickets to Maddie’s LIVE special taping on 9/20 in NYC! It will be the funniest thing you’ve ever seen, and the entire WHGS crew will be there: 6pm - https://www.comedycellar.com/reservations-newyork/?showid=1789941600  8pm - https://www.comedycellar.com/reservations-newyork/?showid=1789948800  This episode is a year too late, listener! Maddie Wiener is a stand-up comedian, staff wri...

This episode is going on some kinky vacations, listener! Eliot Glazer is a delightful comedian, writer, actor, and the mind behind some of your favorite TV shows ever made, but today he’s in the apartment to get behind some handsome fellas — if you catch our drift! We discuss the phenomenon of big gay vacations, going to secret cove orgies on pacific islands, short-term flings while you are travel...

This episode is doin’ group stuff, listener! It’s a WHGS first as we shove FIVE whole guests onto the pod — Hilarious non-binary comedian & JFL New Face Freddie Shanel, their super talented girlfriend & musician Camille Schmidt, Ashley’s beloved GF Jen Davis, and comedian Sam Morrison (but he’s only allowed to watch). We discuss getting clocked as non-binary before you even knew it yourself, gende...

This episode is in the TWILIGHT ZONE, listener! Kevin Atwater is an incredible queer musician who has garnered millions of listens across TikTok and Spotify with his honest songwriting, but today he’s in the apartment to honestly tell us one of the freakiest stories we’ve heard… We discuss otherworldly hookups in haunted houses filled with stuffed animals, writing queer music, getting started as a...

This episode is OPEN and HONEST, listener! Neil Rubenstein is an incredible pansexual comedian who regularly opens for Ashley on the road, but today they’re meeting in the HOTEL ROOM for something a bit more saucy… We discuss polyamory, its benefits & challenges, mental health & healing, sex vs. gender expression, hooking up with gay republicans, and falling in love with a poly granny. Ashley goes...

Watch Caitlin Peluffo’s new special, “Prosciutto Rose,” RIGHT NOW: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8M5HKgLyjcI — If you like Ashley’s comedy, you’re gonna love Caitlin! This episode is making sexy choices, listener! Caitlin Peluffo is a fan-favorite stand up comedian HOT off her success on Kevin Hart’s “Funny AF,” but today she’s returning to the apartment for the 4th time for some afternoon delig...

This episode is FIGHTING, listener! Jen Davis is an incredible actor, content creator, and Ashley’s perfect girlfriend, but today she’s sitting on the couch to chew Ashley out — and NOT in that way, listener! We discuss hooking up with people out of the country, the beauty of a long-distance fling, drawing boundaries with your partner, and being cute even in your sleep. Ashley gets in serious hot...

This episode is learning and growing, listener! It’s been a long time coming — a catch up with beloved comedian and friend of the show Ali Kolbert! It’s a duo episode today as we discuss what everyone’s been up to, straight propaganda in the New York Times, navigating comphet, disgustingly stinky ladies, and the three qualities you MUST have in order to get onto a boat. Also Ali made a VIRAL QUEER...

This episode is smooching, listener! Beloved actor, comedian, writer, and friend Breanne Williamson RETURNS for the annual ASH-BRE CATCH-UP — and you best believe there is gonna be some kissing involved! We discuss the crisis of kissing in younger generations, Love Island, the mental illness of young men, European vs. American sense of humor, and whether or not “Belly” is sexy dirty talk. Ashley h...

(TW // self harm discussion; 8:14 - 9:52) This episode is making awkward moves, listener! Sabrina Wu (they/them) is an unfathomably funny stand up comedian, writer, and actor who you've seen on Joy Ride, Murderbot, and Abbot Elementary — but today they’re in the apartment to pop their queer cherry! We discuss realizing you’re gay when young, the bizarre ways you explore at that age, genderqueer id...

This episode is living through a real fantasy, listener! Zach Noe Towers is an endlessly lovable stand up comedian whose work has been featured on E!, Netflix, and Comedy Central, but today he’s in the apartment to showcase his work from GRINDR! We discuss having a LEGENDARY hookup straight out of “Heated Rivalry,” interpreting flirty body language, short & fiery flings, and big boy dumps. Ashley...

This episode is going out tonight, listener! Rachel Karp is a writer, producer, and lesbian bar expert who has been documenting the history of sapphic nightlife in America, but today she’s in the sapphic space of Ashley’s apartment — and we’re doin’ BODY SHOTS! We discuss lesbian history through the lens of queer bars, the characters and stories found in them, age-gap relationships, and kissing yo...

This episode is musical, listener! WHGS is comin’ at you from ENGLAND with Dodie — an incredible singer, songwriter, and YouTuber with top-charting albums and a hit single, “She,” that took over Lesbian TikTok. We discuss writing queer anthems before knowing you’re queer, the odd ways you explore bisexuality before coming out, internalized homophobia, breakups, and being just like Zooey Deschanel...

Get the full versions of all these highlights, PLUS uncut episodes, live streams, live show tickets, and MORE at https://www.patreon.com/WHGS. Ashley has just wrapped up her 2026 tour in Europe (thanks to everyone who came out to a show), so to give her a week to recover, we have decided to release a bunch of highlights from our exclusive PATREON ONLY bonus series — You’re Having Gay Sex. We react...

This episode is all about theory, listener! Carmen Maria Machado is an author, essayist, and finalist for the National Book Award with her impressive body of work around queer identity, but today she’s in the apartment to put her genius towards solving age-old queer conundrums! We discuss topping vs. bottoming as a lesbian, what that actually entails, how it manifests in practice, and the Renaissa...

This episode is lore heavy, listener! Brad Davis is a queer musician, tech artist, and my dear girlfriend’s little brother, but today he’s in the apartment to be my little BOTTOM! In addition, for the FIRST TIME… WHGS producer and man-behind-the-camera Alex Vrahas fills in as co-host. It’s a BOYS EP as we discuss romantic flings while abroad, anticipation in sex, coming out, being a very straight-...