Feminist Wellness

#399: What happens when loving someone turns into managing their growth, their choices, and their willingness to change? This week, I’m exploring the way we can end up taking responsibility for someone else’s development, emotional state, and readiness while losing connection with our own needs. We’re talking about the emails I receive from women asking for resources for their husbands, boyfriends...

Tenderoni Hotline #47: Ever have that moment where you realize you've been living your entire life for everyone else? You’re not alone, and you’re not broken. You’ve just been emotionally outsourcing. In this book series, I name the pattern, share why it develops, and explain how it shapes everything from your relationships to your sense of self. And I’ll tell you how my book, End Emotional Outsou...

#398: What if the patterns you’ve been blaming yourself for were actually survival strategies you learned for a reason? This week, I’m celebrating the paperback release of my book, End Emotional Outsourcing: How to Overcome Your Codependent, Perfectionist, and People-Pleasing Habits . I’m sharing why I wrote this book, the experiences that led me to create the framework of emotional outsourcing, a...

Tenderoni Hotline #46: Hello my love! Welcome back to the Tenderoni Hotline, our cozy corner of the Feminist Wellness podcast where I answer your most tender, honest, and heartfelt questions about healing, self-trust, and nervous system care. In today’s episode, we’re exploring why setting boundaries can feel so hard, and why guilt often floods in after you finally speak your truth. We’ll talk abo...

#397: What happens after the breakthrough? After the ceremony, the therapy session, the retreat, or the moment where everything suddenly makes sense? Why do we sometimes return to the same patterns even after something profound has opened? This week, I explore the difference between catharsis and integration, and why the peak experiences that create possibility are not the same thing as the daily...

Tenderoni Hotline #45: In this episode, we’re diving into how to stop emotional outsourcing, that habit of looking outside yourself for safety, belonging, and worth, and start reclaiming those from within. I’ll share how to recognize when you’re losing yourself in other people’s needs, plus simple, science-backed nervous system regulation tools to help you catch dysregulation before it hits a 10....

#396: What if your feelings aren’t something to control, fix, or get rid of, but something trying to guide you back to yourself? This week, I explore what it really means to stop running from your feelings and why so many of us have learned to push our emotions down, power through, or disconnect from what’s happening inside. We look at how our nervous systems, social conditioning, and past experie...

Tenderoni Hotline #44: Hello, my love. If you’ve ever been told to “calm down” and felt your anger spike instead of settle, or found yourself feeling anxious, nauseous, or completely overwhelmed at the thought of making a simple phone call, you are so not alone. In this episode, we gently unpack what is really happening in your body in those moments. We explore why “calm down” can feel so deeply i...

#395: What if the pain you’re experiencing is real, but the suffering you’re carrying on top of it is something you can choose to put down? This week, I explore the Buddhist concept of the second arrow and how we often add to our own suffering through self-blame, judgment, and the stories we create about the painful things that happen in our lives. We look at the difference between honoring our pa...

Tenderoni Hotline #43: Hello my love! Welcome back to the Tenderoni Hotline, our cozy corner of the Feminist Wellness podcast where I answer your most tender, honest, and heartfelt questions about healing, self-trust, and nervous system care. In today’s episode, we’re exploring what happens when you finally find the courage to speak your truth, only to be met with defensiveness, blame, or long exp...

#394: What if the thing keeping you stuck isn’t your past choices, but the way you continue to judge yourself for making them? This week, I explore why self-compassion is such a powerful part of real change and why beating yourself up for who you used to be only creates more shame, disconnection, and stuckness. We dive into how we often reject the version of ourselves who learned survival strategi...

Tenderoni Hotline #42: What happens when you finally set a boundary you've been terrified to say out loud, only to have someone ignore it completely? And how do you know when you're stuck in a victim mindset that's keeping you from creating the life and relationships you want? In this episode, I answer two listener questions about boundaries, accountability, and nervous system healing. First, we e...

#393: People pleasing can look like compassion, generosity, and care, but what happens when it comes at the cost of your own needs? This week, I dive into why people pleasing happens, how it becomes a pattern that shapes our relationships and sense of self, and why it can leave us feeling disconnected, resentful, and overwhelmed. I explore how these habits were often brilliant survival strategies...

Tenderoni Hotline #41: If you know you’re a people pleaser but cannot seem to stop, this episode is for you. In this Tenderoni Hotline, I answer two listener questions that go straight to the heart of emotional outsourcing and nervous system healing. First: “I know I’m a people pleaser. How do I stop?” We explore why people pleasing is not a personality flaw or lack of boundaries. It is a nervous...

#392: Have you ever wondered why routines feel impossible to maintain, even when you know they’re supposed to help you? What if the problem isn’t your discipline, motivation, or ability to be consistent, but the way you’ve been taught to structure your life? This week, I explore the difference between ritual vs. routine and why ritual may be a more supportive framework for brains and nervous syste...

#391: This week, I explore the question so many of us struggle with: how do we stop overextending ourselves and self-abandoning… without losing the parts of ourselves that genuinely love supporting others? Tune in this week to learn how to recognize when you’re giving from a place of genuine care versus fear, obligation, or a need to prove your worth. I’ll guide you through understanding how your...

Tenderoni Hotline #40: Hello my love, and welcome back to the Tender Hotline, the soft and spacious corner of the Feminist Wellness Podcast where we explore your most intimate and layered questions about healing, nervous system care, and reclaiming your self-trust. In this episode, we’re diving into three powerful questions that so many emotionally outsourced folks grapple with: Do I have to fully...

#390: Have you always been the person who knows how to help? The one who notices everyone else’s needs, steps in quickly, and feels responsible for making things better? In this episode, I explore why so many people in healing professions struggle with exhaustion, over-functioning, and self-abandonment. We look at how becoming “the helper” often starts long before your career, and how those early...

#389: Have you ever felt like failure defines you? Like missing a goal, making a mistake, or falling short is proof that you’re broken or incapable? In this episode, I explore what failure really is and how our interpretation of it shapes whether we get stuck or grow. Drawing on my own experiences, from life coaching to ceramics, I explore how the stories we tell ourselves after failure can either...

Tenderoni Hotline #39: Hello my love, and welcome back to the Tenderoni Hotline, our soft and spacious corner of the Feminist Wellness Podcast where we explore your most tender questions about healing, nervous system care, and returning home to yourself. In today’s episode, we’re diving into three powerful questions that illuminate just how deeply our nervous systems are wired to protect us, even...

#388: Do you ever notice how the way you talk to yourself shapes everything - your mood, your decisions, and how you show up in the world? Join me today to learn how to notice your habitual self-talk, pause to observe it, and begin shifting it with intention. I guide you through understanding the power of your “second brain” and how old thought patterns shape your feelings and actions. We’ll also...

#387: Are you exhausted by the endless drive to be perfect? Do you find yourself constantly overthinking, overproducing, or feeling like nothing you do is ever enough? This week, I dive into the patterns behind perfectionism and why striving for flawless results can keep you stuck. We’ll explore how perfectionism shows up in your daily life - from over-preparing and overexplaining to people-pleasi...

Tenderoni Hotline #38: What if chronic pain, anxiety, burnout, and people pleasing all stem from the same underlying pattern? In this episode, I sit down with bestselling author, psychotherapist, and mind-body medicine expert Nicole Sachs to explore the hidden connection between trauma, the nervous system, and what I call emotional outsourcing. Emotional outsourcing is the habit of looking outside...

#386: Do you ever find yourself giving to others while quietly wondering if your own needs are being met? Are you unsure how to identify what you truly want versus what you think you should want? In this episode, I explore the often overlooked patterns that make it hard to distinguish your genuine wants and needs from the expectations of those around you. By the end of this episode, you’ll underst...

#385: Do you feel like your confidence vanished when the structure, role, or life you relied on disappeared? Have you ever wondered why you feel shaky, uncertain, or like a stranger to yourself after major life transitions? This week, I explore what happens to our confidence after a rupture and how to rebuild it in a way that is truly yours. I dive into the difference between borrowed confidence a...