Every Man’s Battle Podcast

JJ West, Doug Barnes, and guest Dr. Jim Phillis share a framework for talking to your kids about your sexual addiction. Have a topic you would like to hear? Email us at EMBPodcast@newlife.com and let us know. Use discount code EMBPOD to save $100 when you register for the Every Man's Battle Intensive. Learn more about integrity here.

JJ West and Doug Barnes offer insight to help clergy be well-informed and equipped to support couples navigating the betrayal and recovery process, including ways to avoid common mistakes made in counseling. Have a topic you would like to hear? Email us at EMBPodcast@newlife.com and let us know. Use discount code EMBPOD to save $100 when you register for the Every Man's Battle Intensive. Learn mor...

JJ West, Doug Barnes, and guest Bob Good examine forgiveness. Referencing the biblical definition, they discuss what forgiveness is and isn’t. They address misconceptions and barriers to forgiveness, emphasizing that one cannot be pressured into forgiving. The explain why full disclosure is vital to the forgiveness process. Have a topic you would like to hear? Email us at EMBPodcast@newlife.com an...

JJ West and Doug Barnes talk with a guest, Rick, who shares his journey from living a double life, to attending the Every Man's Battle workshop in 2012, to having a solid marriage today. Rick highlights the importance of community, accountability, sustained effort, and connection to maintaining long term recovery. Have a topic you would like to hear? Email us at EMBPodcast@newlife.com and let us k...

JJ West, Doug Barnes, and guest Dr. Sam Fraser discuss common mistakes in long-term recovery from sexual integrity issues. They highlight the importance of maintaining internal motivation, avoiding complacency, the need for humility, character development and continuous growth, as well as nurturing a spiritual life. The conversation underscores the value of continuous effort and community in achie...

JJ West, Doug Barnes, and guest Dr. Sam Fraser discuss long-term recovery from sexual addiction. They emphasize the importance of relational growth and character change beyond mere sobriety, highlighting the significance of actions over words, maintaining sobriety, and the role of accountability in recovery. The evolution from initial recovery to long-term recovery is discussed, noting the need fo...

JJ West, Doug Barnes, and guest Marc Cameron discuss the differences between men and women in sexuality, noting that these differences can lead to misunderstandings and rejection in relationships if not understood. They emphasize the importance of having vulnerable conversations and working together to build a healthy sexual and emotional relationship and offer solutions for the challenges men oft...

JJ West, Doug Barnes, and guest Laura Mangin McDonald continue discussing the challenges faced by partners of individuals not engaging in recovery work for sexual integrity issues. They touch on the importance of personal healing and support systems, the grieving process, therapeutic separation, boundaries and the role of community in the healing journey. Have a topic you would like to hear? Email...

JJ West, Doug Barnes, and guest Laura Mangin McDonald discuss what a betrayed women should do if her man isn’t doing good recovery work. Drawing from her own betrayal experience, Laura highlights the need to set clear boundaries; to engage in a healing process independent of his; to have a support system and a trauma therapist; to know her identity in Christ; and to trust God. Have a topic you wou...

JJ West and Doug Barnes are joined by guest Laura Mangin McDonald to continue the discussion on full disclosure in the context of betrayal trauma. They discuss the emotional impact of full disclosure, noting that a trauma-trained therapist can help both parties. Common mistakes made in the disclosure process are reviewed, and they emphasize the need for the betrayed woman to have the space and com...

JJ West and Doug Barnes discuss the importance and components of full disclosure in addressing sexual integrity issues, stressing that full disclosure is a process, not an event. The need for thoroughness, humility, and rigorous honesty in disclosing past behaviors and significant life events is explained. They share the significance of impact statements from the offended party as well as men's le...

JJ West and Doug Barnes discuss the challenges of maintaining sexual integrity while single. The importance of developing an internal conscience and having a supportive community is explained. They highlight the need for singles to understand and embrace their sexuality as good, contrary to the negative messages from the purity culture. The significance of parents having open, non-shaming conversa...

JJ West and Doug Barnes discuss the unique challenges of maintaining sexual integrity in full-time ministry. The increased scrutiny and higher standards placed on religious leaders can lead to feelings of isolation and vulnerability. Having community and accountability are paramount, and they urge ministers to seek support and not attempt to fight their battles alone. They provide practical advice...

JJ West and Doug Barnes discuss the biblical concepts of kindness and godly sorrow as pathways to repentance. They assert that self-condemnation and shame do not lead to true repentance, as these behaviors lack a fundamental change in behavior and thought. However, kindness that reflects God's nature invites repentance, and godly sorrow - a broken-heartedness over sin - will lead to lasting change...

JJ West and Doug Barnes continue their discussion on measuring recovery success. The conversation underscores the integration of inner work with outward behaviors for effective recovery, advocating for a balanced approach that includes both tangible actions and intangible character development. They emphasize the importance of time, believable trust-building behaviors, and the sanctification of on...

JJ West and Doug Barnes discuss ways of measuring success when in recovery for sexual integrity issues. They emphasize the importance of balancing tangible actions like step work, therapy, and accountability with intangible heart changes. They caution against viewing recovery as a task list and stress the need for practical application and collaboration with a support team, underscoring the value...

Men who are acting out often think the worst thing possible would be for others to find out. J.J. West and Doug Barnes discuss why that is actually the best thing that could happen. They address the fears that keep men stuck from revealing their true selves and how it perpetuates the cycle of acting out. They explain how freedom comes from sharing your story and being fully known and accepted. Hav...

J.J. West and Doug Barnes continue the discussion on why it’s important to continue fighting for your sexual integrity, even when you are struggling, with the reminder that recovery is a process and not an outcome. Breaking free from outcome related thinking helps address acting in behaviors and keeps you in the fight so your legacy can be of a man who, with God’s help, changed things for himself...

J.J. West and Doug Barnes discuss why it is important to continue fighting for your sexual integrity, even when you don’t feel like it and you’re struggling or failing. The struggle is a process, not an outcome, and they encourage listeners to consider that the fight is for your heart; your character; your spouse and her heart; your family; and how you think about things. The confidence that other...

Season 2 of The Every Man’s Battle podcast launches in January! See what’s in store here. To make sure you are caught up on Season 1 and prepare you for the next season, we’re finishing the year with episodes you need to hearor hear again. Hosts: JJ West Doug Barnes Our hosts wrap up the discussion on secondary boundaries and the work involved in recovery. Have a topic you would like to hear? Emai...

Season 2 of The Every Man’s Battle podcast launches in January! See what’s in store here. To make sure you are caught up on Season 1 and prepare you for the next season, we’re finishing the year with episodes you need to hearor hear again. Hosts: JJ West Doug Barnes Our hosts discuss psychological secondary boundaries in recovery and how it differs from primary boundaries. Have a topic you would l...

Season 2 of The Every Man’s Battle podcast launches in January! See what’s in store here. To make sure you are caught up on Season 1 and prepare you for the next season, we’re finishing the year with episodes you need to hearor hear again. Hosts: JJ West Doug Barnes Our hosts discuss secondary boundaries in recovery. Have a topic you would like to hear? Email us at EMBPodcast@newlife.com and let u...

Season 2 of The Every Man’s Battle podcast launches in January! See what’s in store here. To make sure you are caught up on Season 1 and prepare you for the next season, we’re finishing the year with episodes you need to hearor hear again. Hosts: JJ West Doug Barnes Our hosts discuss the importance of boundaries, the different types of boundaries and why they are important. Have a topic you would...

Season 2 of The Every Man’s Battle podcast launches in January! See what’s in store here. To make sure you are caught up on Season 1 and prepare you for the next season, we’re finishing the year with episodes you need to hearor hear again. Hosts: JJ West Doug Barnes Laura and our hosts dive deeper into grief and empathy with the wives of those who have betrayed them. Have a topic you would like to...

Season 2 of The Every Man’s Battle podcast launches in January! See what’s in store here. To make sure you are caught up on Season 1 and prepare you for the next season, we’re finishing the year with episodes you need to hearor hear again. Hosts: JJ West Doug Barnes JJ West Doug Barnes share part of an interview between Steve Arterburn and Shaunti Feldhahn about criticism of the Every Man's Battle...