Distorted View Daily

Episode Summary Friday’s show is a greasy buffet of hotline perverts, Andy Ditch getting busted over his diffuser stink offensive, a man who used his severed penis like a flammable prop, and a whole lot of gay panic disguised as patriot masculinity. Frankie MacDonald delivers a weather update for Sydney, Nova Scotia that quickly becomes a celebration of sunshine, female fans, and women in bikinis...

On Today's Show: The episode kicks off with a mentally handicapped rendition of Proud Mary , which somehow rolls directly into the return of Prescription Lady , now remixed into a full-blown crystal-meth pop icon. Tim debuts a fresh musical abomination built from her one-word discography, including a tweaker rewrite of I Am a Happy Mall Walker Girl . Against all reason, it kind of slaps. Liste...

Episode Summary The summer Sideshow sale gets revived after site issues blocked signups, so the annual “please support this stupidity before summer kills me” campaign is officially back on. Tim revisits the depressing majesty of the Great American State Fair , which still sounds less like a celebration and more like a heat-soaked recruitment expo with a single Ferris wheel and several kiddie-pool...

The program opens with an aggressively stupid and weirdly committed “Watch Me Use My Dildo” rap, because apparently that’s how we honor the nation before fireworks season. Tim checks back in after returning from Ohio, where he’s been dealing with his mom’s medical situation, endless driving, and the general spiritual rot of Ashtabula . There’s also an extra detour to Buffalo for a vintage computer...

Episode Summary Tim cracks open a gloriously sweaty Sideshow mess packed with busted national anthems, STD paperwork on Judge Judy , a toilet allegedly murdered by one very large backside, porn sites trying to become prestige TV, a woman dropping a public deuce on a public bus, school pickup line cocaine, and a parade of beautifully deranged voicemails. Best Of opener, fresh chaos anyway: Tim chec...

The Garbage Man Wants Your Pussy • Krispy Kreme Cunnilingus • Concert Seat Catastrophes Today's episode begins with Tim pulling back the curtain on one of Tainted Broth's most beloved songs. You'll hear the hilariously awful "human demo" that eventually became A Whole Raw Load , proving that sometimes artificial intelligence really is smarter than the guy behind the microphon...

Today's Sideshow Exclusive starts with a reminder that your sleeping brain is a liar. Tim shares a "brilliant" sitcom idea he wrote down in the middle of the night about becoming the world's first third-shift day trader, only to discover in the morning that none of it makes any sense. Unfortunately, you've all got to suffer through it anyway. Then it's time to check back...

Note: This is a re-upload to fix an audio problem (Perver Marriage should sound better now) Episode Summary Monday’s show is an unholy Pride Month sendoff stuffed with gooners , foot fetish repentance , Katie Souza’s alien gynecology saga , and a racist livestream goblin getting outed for allegedly cozying up to a trans woman. Classy? No. Entertaining? Unfortunately, yes. Namesake Jake sponsors th...

Episode Summary The show opens with a Seinfeld-flavored test of patience remix and the usual DV bouquet of pussy talk, Jewish space lasers, and Tim politely telling the world to fuck off. Tim also gives a quick shout-out to Sinemax , the mastermind behind the glorious Seinfeld remix work that helped kick off the program in style. The opening monologue briefly flirts with racial disaster before swe...

Episode Summary Wednesday’s show serves up  phone-based paranoia , a fresh crop of internet-brained lunatics, an  Arby’s herpes lawsuit , and a Walmart scream-fight powered almost entirely by racial tension and cat-piss accusations. Basically, another nutritious breakfast from Distorted View Daily. Brad Carter strikes again:  Tim opens with a prank call masterpiece where a fake  MetroPCS employee...

Episode Summary Monday’s show kicks off with a full-blown meltdown over  checkers , detours into the feces-slicked world of  Rachel Gerster , then barrels through a wildly inappropriate French class, a bloody  pickleball  assault, and a few listener calls to cleanse the palate with fresh stupidity. Checkers betrayal:  Tim discovers the official rules of checkers are apparently designed by lunatics...

Episode Summary Friday’s show lurches from Sandy Kane’s ancient, flopping public-access nudity to a naked VR hypnotist who used to bang animals, with stops at a peeling Lincoln Memorial reflecting pool, sovereign-citizen courtroom gibberish, racist parking-lot shrieking, and a Texas cop who somehow turned poop misconduct into a promotion. Sandy Kane opens the show with her gloriously filthy versio...

Episode Summary Rod Herpes sponsor birthday chaos brings back mush-mouthed church introductions and the immortal glory of John Dacre butchering a holy pizza medley. A fresh burst of tranny panic ends with a guy calling the cops on a father helping his two little girls wash their hands in a women’s restroom. The dreaded asexual twins return during Pride Month to explain ace oppression, corrective r...

Episode Summary Monday’s show is a grimy little buffet of hooker drama , inflatable-fetish weirdos, retro computer sun-bleaching, midget balloon perverts, and a foot-modeling creep who allegedly turned Manhattan hotel rooms into audition-from-hell traps. Basically, everybody made terrible choices except maybe the dog who came home on her own. Sagittarius Shouty returns in full territorial mode, th...

Episode Summary Friday’s show is a beautiful Pride Month trash fire featuring Grindr revenge through windshield destruction , a new 90 Day Fiancé swamp-ogre romance, a woman who learns the hard way that spitting on cops has consequences, an app that ranks your most stressful co-workers, and a wannabe John Wick threatening murder over his impounded dogs. A gay brother smashes a windshield after dis...

Episode Summary This sponsored best-of from 2016 is a beautiful disaster built around Tim’s poop-fueled nightmare game show, a revolting BBC smegma sissy story , Frankie McDonald’s suspicious earthquake wizardry, a pastor blaming porn for a miscarriage, and a Florida gay ramen-noodle domestic battery. Vintage DV, in other words. Ropes of Nut sponsors a best-of for the sheer joy of paying Tim to do...

Episode Summary Wednesday’s show is stuffed with Knicks-fan race diplomacy gone sour , a fascinatingly unwell ex-phone-sex philosopher, planet-India manicure logic , a drunken Jewish street meltdown, Brad Pitt’s penis-cream trademark drama, and scientists bravely counting everyone’s farts so the rest of us don’t have to. Knicks jubilation officially expires after a loss, turning a one-day N-word p...

Episode Summary Monday kicks off with Pride Month preacher hysteria , a fresh batch of internet swamp creatures, and three gloriously stupid news stories involving stolen adult diapers , mummy sourdough , and magic mushrooms for Alzheimer’s . Basically, civilization is hanging by a skid-marked thread. Angela Cummings returns to celebrate Pride Month the only way she knows how, by screaming about h...

Episode Summary Friday’s show is a proper freak buffet: Christmas rape audio, Katie Souza exposing George Costanza as a witch-mermaid operative, Indian airport fury, pedal-pumping car fetish weirdness, VRChat wedding sabotage, an old lady Liam Neeson scam beatdown, and a man turning cartoon characters into fleshlights for art. Somehow it all feels alarmingly on-brand. Katie Souza returns with fres...

Episode Highlights Trans vs. Trans on Piers Morgan goes completely sideways when a non-binary guest tries to jump in, Piers starts poking at pronouns like a confused old bulldog, and Blair White gets squeezed out of her own segment. Sleep-cocking research uncovers a woman apparently snoring with a penis still in her mouth, prompting Tim to wonder whether throat vibrations count as a legitimate bed...

Episode Summary Monday’s show is a real mixed bag of brain damage: a rogue helicopter patriot screaming about national security, Tim’s mom getting a birthday serenade through a garbage phone connection, boundary-coach nonsense, grocery-cart warfare, bird-soul rebirth, bent-phone scam artists, and two fresh Florida updates featuring a fish backpack and stolen breast-milk Stanley ambitions. The show...

Episode Summary Friday’s show is a real romantic buffet of human failure: anniversary pegging audio, a Thailand hookup meltdown, backyard gunpowder s’mores, illiterate adults short-circuiting on index cards. Peter and Marissa’s two-year anniversary sponsorship gets the full DV treatment, which naturally means romance is expressed through violent pegging clips and repeated demands to “rape my boy p...

Episode Summary Today’s show is a lovely little buffet of public meltdowns, fake radio hell, McDonald’s breakfast propaganda, a therapist who immediately forgets therapy, an airplane aisle bulldozer, barn-ready Mead nonsense, and a Florida crack theme that really ties the room together. A full-on McDonald’s breakfast sandwich ad assault opens the show, complete with jingles, fake station IDs, and...

Episode Summary Memorial Day on DV means patriotic confusion, old-person oversharing, racist seafood-service disasters, naked Florida menace behavior, and a fresh batch of dirtbag streamer filth. Tim also spends a shocking amount of time trying to fix the American calendar, which honestly might be the most reasonable thing in the whole episode. The show kicks off with a gloriously hateful Westboro...

🔥 Episode Summary Tim digs deep into the DV vault for a classic gay porn review episode featuring Palmer’s Lust — a low-budget gay thriller filled with terrible acting, bizarre accents, crystal meth energy, and desert hostage drama. Plus: wedding rap disasters, breakup folk songs, Walmart rebellion, Pornhub’s top searches of 2018, and giant satellite-visible penguin shit stains. Today’s cinematic...