Brilliant Observations

Mmmmm...catalogs. Is there anything better to arrive in the mail? Sears. JC Penney. Spiegel. Consumer Distributors. J Peterman. Even The ToysRUs Look Book. Missy takes us down mail-order memory lane as a sweet antidote to the daring political discussion of early voting in our two battleground states. Then, it's Tom Hardy's dog's voice. Subtitles. And a fullsome dissection of the Netflix hit Nobody...

What's more shocking than Dairy Queen's new vomit-themed chicken slabs? Perhaps warm pimento cheese masquerading as a gay-hating chicken crime. Missy does the Lord's work with a tricky visit to see her ornery parents. Her reward? A vintage Dow Jones ticker and 6.2 billion Toby mugs (all available to ship now). Amy goes wee wee wee all the way home on a Trump pee-pad rumor. But don't fret, Dear Lis...

It's another whirlwind episode, Dear Listener, and not just because of Hurricane Milton. Join us as we dive deep into Missy's true love language — gifting — only to discover the biggest gift she could ever give "doesn't come from the store." Well, well! Color me interested. 

Move over, Call Her Daddy, there's a new STD-aware podcast in town. Jim Carey kills another one — or does he? Missy officiates a wedding. And Amy suffers the cosmic trauma of TikTok's Josh (and Josh's Mom). 

It's getting hot in here, Dear Listener, and not for the reasons you think. It's the semi-annual Thermostat Wars, and Amy is no where near winning. Plus, Missy punctuates her restful hour-long visits to the beach with a luxurious new Dispensary find: and it's the actual Dispensary. And TikTok disgraces Josh and his Mom give the world a first-hand peek behind the Dollar General discount bin. Warnin...

First things first, Dear Listener: The Bear is NOT a comedy. This week, we dive deep into the file cabinet to uncover the many mysteries of Dina's Secret Folder (it's genetic!). Emmy wins and losses. Bucket list dates of future past. Dave Grohl steps out (again). And the main event: does Amy actually know the would-be assassin who stalked former president Donald Trump? Listen and learn, kids. And...

What's better than King Charles's sausage fingers, Taylor Swift's Kamala Harris endorsement and microdosing on Costco pallet-sized overstock unboxings on TikTok? Knowing who your friends are. Join us as we laugh our way through the ins and outs of adult friendships, starting with when to make friends, how to keep them and, best of all, what it means to live your life according to the Three Ds.  An...

How late is too late for checking out after checkout time? Missy feels this one in the gut. In male news, Nut Talk reaches new heights as we "take to the Internet" for bathing advice. Missy works through the final days of renting the beachhouse. And Amy starts a September Reset. All this on more. Heh heh heh.

Taking a break from our near-constant discussion of precipitous bowel release (just kidding, friends), we venture into the oft-overlooked territory of stealing from one's siblings. Time was, we stole sweatshirts, devil dogs, prime seating on car trips. This week, it's friends. Next week, who knows?  Plus, Amy gets hacked. Feeding the children ramps up. And Missy yearns for a return to her sandy se...

Of all the delicious things we could offer you, Dear Listener — and let's be honest, we're offered you quite a few — there's nothing more enticing than what we have loaded up for you this week. Friendship. Get ready for all the feels when Missy remembers just who the F she is during these troubled, trying times. And yes, we sample the mayonnaise. 

Lu La Roe. Olympic breakdancing. Aging parents. Volunteering for jobs you have no intention of doing. And of course, Disneyland. Care to join, Dear Listener, as Melissa audibly implodes? It's a roaring good time, we promise. Just don't mention Tom Cruise.  

Where shall we begin, Dear Listener? Oh I know! The toilet . It's a riotous week for podcasting, gang, replete with questionable topics, sex dream recaps, depilitories gone wild, and — you guessed it — how many fingers is Melissa holding up? We go there, kids. And there, and there, and oh my goodness there, too.  Definitely not suitable for the kids this week. But as the french pole vaulters say,...

Quick question: does violence make every sport better? We're speaking of course, Dear Listener, of the oh, oh, oh, oh-LYM-pics, you knoooooww ( sung to the tune of Ozempic ), and the global awareness of yet another competitive event made that much more exciting by the threat of fullly sanctioned mid-competition paddling. And we do mean paddling.  We're talking all things "Schports!" this week, Dea...

Lewd, much? It's defnitely a not suitable for work episode this week, Dear Listener, as we stumble through the sudden rise of female-centered sex acts in mainstream Hollywood. But not to worry. We also cover hostess gifts, double chins, the rising cost of law school and rats at the bedside. Fun stuff!

It's the People Doing Bad Things episode, Dear Listener, and to be honest, what else would you expect in a week when a former POTUS and prospective nominee gets shot? Vigilante Teen-Led Pedophile Sting Operations, of course! We're riding the wave of insanity that is July 2024, Dear Listener, and that means no shortage of content for us to laugh about. Join us as we dissect the moral obgligations o...

Up this week: unexpected nuclear alerts (both about and completely not about Joe Biden), Beverly Hills Cop the remake featuring what's-his-name, and Middle Schoolers Behaving Badly (TikTok Edition). All that, plus unpaid labor, the trouble with generational trauma, and lessons from Hurricane Beryl. We even throw in a banging popcorn recipe to keep it light. Lots to love in this one, Dear Listener....

Swifties forgetting themselves, Costco is the new venue, and the biologic inevitibility of duck vitamins (it's a thing). Where would you be without us, Dear Listener? Slightly sadder and a wee bit wiser, I'd say.  Sounds like a fair trade. 

Ahhh, nudity on camera. Will you ever not fascinate us? This week, Melissa and Amy uncover (see what I did there?) the difference between acting, Bridgerton, and porn. We also cover shieding one's Littles from dangerous words and deeds. And the Police make a special appearance in a very showy Tesla. Why, what were you looking for? Documented evidence of Amazon delivering your package to the wrong...

Ever wonder how conspiracy theories and complex, multisystem traumas get their start? Let's ask Melissa's Mom.  You sincerely won't believe this one, Gang.  No spoilers, but you might never see the Clean Plate Club the same way again.  All that, plus the wonders of evening weed, New York Times Games round up, the true purpose of luxury items, fake influencers, berries at Erewhon, and the endlessly...

Looking for a gentler way to fall asleep than My Chemical Romance? Don't use this episode — unless laughing is your favorite way to drift off (see what we did there?). Join us as we recap a raucus Bat Mitzvah among friends, some gentle penis humor, and a few favorite accounts you have to see on TikTok. 

If you're looking for a man in Finance, Trust Fund, 6'5", blue eyes, then keep looking. All we got here is a Waffle House training manual, the world's weirest obiturary and a long-overdue congressional censure. Serve that up with a lil no-tip salami and a brief dive into dating before cell phones, and you've got yourself a podcast. There's laughs here, friends. Dig in.