Zen Wisdom for Your Everyday Life

Send us Fan Mail We're right in the midst of the holiday season, offering thanks, giving gifts. But rather than being only joyous, this time of year can become fraught with anxiety. These kinds of questions accost us. Did I give enough? Are they pleased with me and my gift? What will I receive in return? Many feel drained and exhausted by all the demands they feel are upon them now. All of th...

Send us Fan Mail So often we become hurt in our relationships and have no idea why. When something seems sweet and enticing, we feel it is good for us, and beneficial.  When we have happy feelings or think our needs are being met we feel that all is going well. Then, when things change, great disappointment, resentment and confusion can be stirred up. That is because we do not know the difference...

Send us Fan Mail When we practice Zen principles and actually live them in our relationships what we are doing is building a foundation for love. These principles do not only belong to Zen, but are part of all the world's scriptures. They are laws, like  the laws of gravity, and when understood and taken to heart,  all our encounters become beneficial and heart warming. It is extremely import...

Send us Fan Mail We are all longing for the right relationship, one where we feel loved, safe and understood. However, despite how much we try to make that happen, it is very common for disappointment and conflict to arise.  Some feel that suffering is inevitable in relationships and an Unshakeable love cannot be found. That is because we are not building our relationships on a foundation which is...

Send us Fan Mail We believe that each day is like another and that we return to the same situation again and again. Some feel stuck by this, others feel there are endless chances to do what is needed. What we do not realize is that this day, this step, this moment will not come again. When we are not aware of what is going on right now, not present to the moment, everything seems the same. When we...

Send us Fan Mail There are so many voices, sounds, and noises that confront us hour by hour, day by day.  They easily becoming disturbing, confusing and contradict one another. Rather than understanding, confusion and upset appears.  We deeply want to get the meaning, but the message eludes us. Beneath all the noises, we do not hear the harmony, the truth of all we are hearing,  the song of the Un...

Send us Fan Mail Real meetings are magical. They happen spontaneously when we least expect it. As we let go of our usual routines, expectations and that which we depend upon, an opening can happen for a real meeting to take place.  The Hut can be anywhere,  a place that is not bound or guarded by heavy walls, and patterns. In many spiritual traditions those who practice, leave their usual place of...

Send us Fan Mail In Zen practice, every moment counts, every detail of our life calls for  attention. A famous Zen saying says, "Messy shoes, messy mind." This guides us not to throw things around, helter skelter, but to be aware of how things have served us, and where they belong.  Therefore the instruction, pick your coat up from the floor and put it where it belongs. Such a simple act...

Send us Fan Mail Not realizing who we truly are, we constantly struggle to prove our worth. One activity and relationship after another is used to feel good about ourselves, to attain a meaningful identity. And this identity that we work so hard to fulfill goes through endless success and failure. Up and down, back and forth. Ultimately as this go on, despair sets in. Many feel they can never be g...

Send us Fan Mail A well known saying in Zen is, "When they come, we welcome, when they go, we do not pursue." This beautiful teaching is in itself the heartbeat of our practice.  As we sit in zazen and do not move, we stop grabbing for what we want, or pushing away what is troubling. Instead we  see it all, embrace it, become the space in which everything arises and then departs. When th...

Send us Fan Mail We live most of our lives in thoughts, images,  dreams and expectations. When something comes to an end, or when we feel lost and confused, the question comes, "Where is the next step?" There is always somewhere we are headed, a new turn in the road to take. When we consult our thoughts, seeking an answer, it's easy to go around and around. Focusing upon images, rat...

Send us Fan Mail Our lives are guided by our hopes for either the past or future. We hope to change or hold onto people and events in the past, or gain something new and important in the future. This focus often blinds us to so much that is going on now. What we actually have and what we do and do not need. Not only do our hopes filter out what's going on now, but cause huge struggle and upse...

Send us Fan Mail Many of us become so disappointed in ourselves, thinking of all the times we've messed up. Of course, we hide it, pretend it's not happening, and judge ourselves and others harshly.  We focus on all we've done wrong in our lives, rather than what the outcome of our errors could be. . However, from the Zen point of view, everything is needed. All times of confusion,...

Send us Fan Mail Most of our lives feel like a journey, where we go from here to there, focusing upon our destination, hoping it will be wonderful when we arrive.  There's a direction we're headed in and without a direction we can feel lost. The world  can seem anchorless or even meaningless and chaotic.   Zen practice goes a different way. The circle is a a deep expression of Zen, where...

Send us Fan Mail No matter how wonderful an experience we are having is,  usually we want more and more. It's never enough. In fact, the better something is, the emptier we feel when it is over and the deeper the desire for more. This itself is the cause of so much craving craving, loneliness and suffering. It is a great art to be able to say, Thank you, This Suffices. This is more than enoug...

Send us Fan Mail We are all longing for freedom, freedom to be who we are.  Throughout the centuries, over and over the cry comes in so many forms.  So many practices are dedicated to becoming free, emotionally, spiritually, socially.  Many dedicate their lives and work to this goal. But what is it that is constraining us? What is freedom exactly, and how is it truly experienced? Zen practice asks...

Send us Fan Mail So much of the time we struggle for happiness, thinking it is in our control. First we need the right answers, plans, friends, directions.  And yet even when we have all that, happiness is often elusive. It does not arise as a result of man made plans.  It does not arise because we demand it. Yet happiness is inherent in our being and every step we take in truth.  The way to invit...

Send us Fan Mail All day long we find something to complain about that doesn't suit our needs or likes. Whether we voice our complaints out loud or repeat them to ourselves in our mind,  there's no end to them. We think that by complaining, we're actually doing something about what's wrong.  Not so. Complaining is simply an addiction that makes everything worse. We're usin...

Send us Fan Mail In their relationships, many  want to be both close and free at the same time. They crave the connection and intimacy but at the same time need freedom. We all need to grow, change, express ourselves and be who we are. The art of balancing freedom and closeness  is what makes relationships fulfilling and also challenging at the same time. That is why relationhships are an amazing...

Send us Fan Mail It's so easy for relationships to erupt into all kinds of conflicts, upset and disappointment. One minute we're feeling fine, the next moment, we're triggered. Rather than handle upset after it's happened,  go through all kinds of regret and remorse, there are wonderful ways of preventing conflict and misunderstanding from happening in the first place.  These d...

Send us Fan Mail Zen Relationships are simple, easy and full of life. There's no place to stop or hesitate, no turning the clock backwards to become complete. This moment before us contains all possibilities for starting new, being complete and experiencing the love we long for.  Most relationships are filled with memories of past failures, old hopes, demands and dreams. In Zen Relationships/...

Send us Fan Mail We all have the misconception that we are in charge of our day. We make to do lists, focus on goals and walk around with endless expectations. When things don't go our way, we become upset, declare ourselves a failure, or demand that the person we're with change. What a missed opportunity for relaxation, happy surprises and fun. Not only in our relationships but with eve...

Send us Fan Mail So much of our life and relationships get caught in dramatic thunderstorms, where we fight loudly, demanding that our rights and needs be met. The more we struggle, the louder we fight, the more the thunderstorms rages and the less we receive what we truly want. Caught in the whirl of anger and disappointment, hope dims, love fades and, swept up on the shore by the storm, we can f...

Send us Fan Mail We are in the midst of the clamor of different voice beings raised and all kinds of confusing information being released.  it's easy to get lost in the whirl, not knowing what to listen to, who to believe or what to  do next. The voices within and without are persistent, noisy and actually distort what is truly taking place, and where to go from here.   However, when we learn...

Send us Fan Mail Many of us spend our time disappointed, in each other, in the day, and in the outcome of our efforts. Our focus is on what we want and expect,  how it's going and when we will receive our just rewards. This focus is so  limited that we do not see or experience even a fraction of what's going on. We never taste all the wonderful gifts that are being given moment after mom...