Xena Warrior Business

Welcome to the sixth and final season of Xena! We really are in the endgame now, and the fanfic writers have breached the fourth wall, the fanction is now coming from  inside the writer's room!  After giving up his powers to save Gabby and Eve, Ares has been demoted from god of war to just some guy of war. But does he still have a chance with Xena? We talk about grand entrances, fanfiction as a ve...

It's the end of Season 5, and the end of the pantheon of Greek gods! Chris and Ally continue their debate on implied vs. explicit Christianity, while Xena and Gabrielle continue to struggle with the redemption of Xena's daughter Eve. Goodbye, little ones. See you in season 6! We talk about Xena Warrior Princess Season 5 Episode 22: Motherhood Follow us on twitter: @ XenaWarriorBiz  This podcast is...

Continuing where Livia left off, Eve continues to be super good at killing people, making everyone a bit unsure of how to deal with her. Chris discovers the benefits of transformative work, while Ally argues that a Jesus allegory works better than actual Jesus. Both discuss the complications of goodness and birthright, while Xena and Gabrielle say goodbye to one of their own. We talk about Xena Wa...

Xena punches her way out of her own coffin only to find out that she and Gabrielle have been dead for 25 years… and that her baby daughter Eve grew up to become the greatest warlord the world has ever seen. It is the distant future (the distant future) and Xena's really stepped in it this time! We talk about Xena Warrior Princess Season 5 Episode 20: Livia Follow us on twitter: @ XenaWarriorBiz  T...

What happens when the person you love has changed so much that they no longer embody the characteristics that made you fall in love in the first place? Anyway, Xena has to pull off a fuckery to get the gods off her back once and for all. W ill she and Gabrielle pull it off? Or will the Twilight of the Gods just get even more convoluted? We talk about Xena Warrior Princess Season 5 Episode 19: Look...

What would you do if you could only have skin for 99 minutes? After over 5 years of watching executive producer Sam Raimi's hit action/adventure show Xena Warrior Princess, Chris and Ally decided to dive deeper into the noted horror auteur's filmography. First up on our list is Darkman, a 1990 superhero origin story starring Liam Neeson as Dr. Peyton Westlake, an awkward dude who loses his skin fo...

Xena goes undercover as Cleopatra, whose navy is  about to be exploited for the Roman empire. This episode is a vestigial reinforcement of the heteronormative agenda, and we hated it. As Chris says: "There is no reason for this." Anyway, enjoy Natalie Merchant!  We talk about Xena Warrior Princess Season 5 Episode 18: Antony and Cleopatra Follow us on twitter: @ XenaWarriorBiz  This podcast is the...

Do you ever think about what you're going to do with the rest of your life? You know, when you're too old to do kicks and stuff. Or, alternately, have you ever jerked it in the woods to a lake full of bathing Amazons? If so, you may be entitled to a death penalty! Xena and Gabrielle struggle to find the balance between ancient Amazon tradition and traditions of their own, while Joxer struggles to...

This episode was cobbled together with found footage from a failed television pilot where Selma Blair does an Inuyasha and becomes queen of the Amazons, and it shows! Chris reveals the secrets behind his top notch New Zealand accent and spits some hard facts about Amazon episodes of Xena, while Ally tries not to think about pirates. Finally, we welcome back Karl Urban in his fourth and final role...

To celebrate this very special episode, Chris and Ally are joined by Mary and Sascha, the hosts of Radio Amphipolis , Germany's number one Xena podcast! This week, we watch Married With Fishsticks, an episode so terrible it ended with two members of the creative team quitting the show entirely. Kinks are discovered, rude gestures are censored, and many a cringe is to be had as we endure this faile...

In this episode, Xena tells it like it is: if you're trying to kill her baby, she's just not gonna be nice to you. Chris and Ally revel in this well-written episode and discuss the merits of throwing animal carcasses into cities, and celebrate the return of Xena's original costume! We watch Season 5 Episode 14 of Xena Warrior Princess: Amphipolis Under Siege  Follow us on twitter: @ XenaWarriorBiz...

It's baby Eve's first big adventure, and she and mama Xena have to outrun the armies of three angry gods that want them dead. Meanwhile, Joxer is still (still!!!) trying to reconcile his feelings for Gabrielle. Will he finally accept his place in the friend zone? We watch Season 5 Episode 13 of Xena Warrior Princess: Eternal Bonds Follow us on twitter: @ XenaWarriorBiz  This podcast is the spinoff...

We know we swore off Sorbo (we Sworbo'd off Sorbo) but we just had to get this last one out of our system. Becaues the writers of Hercules the Legendary Journeys have lost control of their show, so they go on a writers retreat to come up with some new material. Will the real Hercules (in disguise as noted antisemite Kevin Sorbo) be able to save the show? Or will the network just funnel all of thei...

Folks, it's baby time! Xena's still got a bun in the oven, and that bun is doing dropkicks! As our warrior princess contends with the dangerous world she's about to bring a child into, the Twilight of the Gods  (aka closing time) looms ever closer. Also, Ally geeks out about film combat, and Chris compares Tartarus and the Elysian Fields to… Ikea? Featuring music by the Auralnauts and Semisonic. W...

This episode is burdened by two framing devices, each made weaker by the inclusion of the other. Will Ally make Chris laugh? Will Chris lose the bet? Find out!  We watch Season 5 Episode 11 of Xena Warrior Princess: Punchlines Follow us on twitter: @ XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by @barelysushi . Podcast edited by  @allyspock . Support us on pat...

Chris and Ally take on one of the lost episodes of Xena (a jukebox musical that was too expensive for Netflix) and learn that things that are funny in the writer's room aren't always funny on tv. Tune in to watch the last episode before a bunch of the crew jumping ship to work on Lord of the Rings, and try not to lose your entire mind at the RAP BATTLE. We watch Season 5 Episode 10 of Xena Warrior...

Have you become numb to the violence? If so, this episode is just for you! Xena sort of finds out who her baby daddy is, Chris and Ally sort of try to understand exactly what that means, and Renee O'Connor is elevated to the status of action star. We also get a series wrap on two extremely iconic touchstones of the show. Remember, though: there can be no love without loss, and there can be no Xena...

In a classic "be careful what you wish for" hijinks episode, Xena finds herself in a situation that Chris and Ally really struggle with trying to describe. Ally gets dazzled by Renee O'Connor's fight scenes, Chris gets dazzled by some unknown female Kiwi wrestlers, and everyone is twins! We watch Season 5 Episode 8 of Xena Warrior Princess: Little Problems! Follow us on twitter: @ XenaWarriorBiz T...

With Lucy Lawless still medically prohibited from doing backflips, we get a whole episode where Xena stands in one place and doesn't move. The show also gives us something we haven't seen in a long time: a Greg! Perhaps the last Greg ever! Anyway this episode was actually really upsetting and tonally dissonant and it broke Ally. Please enjoy. Follow us on twitter: @ XenaWarriorBiz This podcast is...

Xena learns that Lao Ma might not have been a great mom, Gabrielle gives Joxer a foot job, and Joxer becomes obsessed with sizeable holes. Meanwhile, in the real world, Chris learns that Chinese cooking is spicy, and Ally learns the true meaning of saltpeter. We got a good twin! We got an evil twin! We got Purity, the sixth episode of season 5 of Xena Warrior Princess! Follow us on twitter: @ Xena...

Well, listeners, it seems like Chris and Ally are going to have to learn the ways of the shamaness... sooner than you thought. Your hosts are back from hiatus and are joined by Xenite and drag queen Wesley Fox to discuss an extremely wild episode of Xena: Them Bones, Them Bones . If you like spooky season, this is the episode for you! Come for the CGI skeleton fight, stay for Chris's Luffy impress...

From Chris's JRPG pon farr to Ally's obsession with anime boxing, your dashing podcast hosts catch you up on what they've been up to, and answer some listener-submitted questions. Sorry for the hiatus! We'll be back soon! Follow us on twitter: @ XenaWarriorBiz  This podcast is the spinoff/sister podcast of SAILOR BUSINESS. Art by  @barelysushi . Podcast edited by  @allyspock . Support us on patreo...

In a very busy episode jam-packed with so many things happening at the same time, Xena asks an important Yahoo question: "Am i gregnant?" Meanwhile, Gabrielle is living having her own Lifetime Original Movie about a girl and a horse learning to trust each other. There's also a knife that sounds like a gun! Chris and Ally sure are a two horse family in this wild, WILD episode! We talk about Season...

Having rediscovered the joy of murder, Xena wants to do all of the murders herself. However, now that Gabrielle is done being a pacifist, she would like to do some murders of her own, thank you very much. Meanwhile, Ares needs a new protege, since Xena turned him down, so he gives us a Were-Gabby! Xena by day, Gabrielle by night! We talk about Season 5 Episode 3 of Xena Warrior Princess: SUCCESSIO...

Whether you prefer the goofier episodes or lean more towards the dramatics, it can't be denied that Chakram is a very significant episode of Xena Warrior Princess. It has character development, lore, new weapons, and some very cool changes to the status quo. We've seen Xena struggling to balance her light and dark sides, but we've never seen her quite like this: with no memories of her dark side w...