"Write Your Best Chapter"

Ever since I became a podcaster and a blogger, and also since I moved to Hawaii, I am approached by people wondering what it's like moving and living here. So many questions. I had to do my own search before moving here. Some of what I learned were true, some of it was not. I am joined by the amazing and accomplished Dr. Rupa Wong, also not a native of Hawaii, sharing our pearls about what it's li...

In times of COVID, as our grief process has been stunted due to lack of in person services, it is so important to move at your own pace. There is no hurry. You move as you need to move. Slow and steady. The society may want you to be done already. People are uncomfortable being around grieving individuals. Sometimes they feel helpless. It is ok. It is not about them. I am giving us permission to t...

First day of spring. A brand new year. A new beginning. I hope you will take this ancient tradition and honor its practices. Offer forgiveness to those who have hurt you. Ask for forgiveness from those whom you have intentionally or unintentionally hurt in the past year. Every year is a new beginning. I wish you love, peace, health and prosperity. Happy New Year: NoRuzetan Pirouz!

All aspects of our lives are opportunities for growth. The sudden loss of a loved one, especially the same age or younger, always feels unsettling. Following many recent losses my colleagues and clients have been sharing with me, I felt like it was a good time to talk about how we should manage our mind during these unprecedented times. There is no urgency, other than that of feeling aware of all...

For the longest time, I went to vacation to get away from my life. When your life is so uncontrollable that you feel like the only way you can find peace is parked somewhere far away, it is time to revisit this thought. I talk about how I would put away my phone in the security box just so that I could shut down the outside chatter. Let's talk about how you can do that without going to Mexico. 

The first time I heard about "Death Cafe" on NPR, I thought it was the most brilliant way of normalizing discussions about death and dying. I think that if my podcast is similar to anything, I would have to say it would be like that space. Except that I am the only one talking here. When I learned that a virtual Death Cafe was happening, I had to invite the host to tell us more. 

With all the talk about mindfulness and its positive effect on our lives, how do we go about incorporating the practice? As we have been socialized to feel accomplished once we complete a to do list, and judge ourselves when we don't, how do we practice acceptance? How can we decide what matters most so that we can focus on those priorities instead? In this mini-coaching session, I will share with...

What if this life is all there is? If you are a non-believer and don't envision an afterlife, how do you grieve and where do you reach out for like minded support? My guest today is a phenomenal activist, mother and grief support leader. When Rebecca Hensler lost her young son, she experienced first hand what it meant to be given the wrong type of support. As a non-believer, she wanted to created...

What is Therapeutic Presence? Can you just sit there with a patient, without offering any treatment or even medication and yet have a meaningful impact? Turns out the answer is easier than one might think. A 'healer' shares her story of why she was drawn to end of life care. As one might imagine, the story is not always linked to a death story. What if you wanted to provide the best of care for hu...

As a little kid, did you look at people who were older and wondered about how their hair turned gray? Andrea did. Then she grew up to become a gerontologist because she loved to really study them. She ended up serving that vulnerable section of our society with so much heart and authenticity. Now she lives in Georgia working as a Marketing Director for a local Hospice agency. She shares her story...

Why is a chaplain here? I often hear that when we walk into a patient's room for a palliative care consultation. What is "Existential Distress"? I have been wanting to share the importance of chaplaincy and their work surrounding end of life care. Fred Grewe is a master story teller to help me do just that. 

Sailing and Slow Travel. What is on your bucket list? There is so much we want to do with our lives until the very end. Some things are easy to keep doing, other things not so much. We talk about the first and last time I felt my father's dialysis thrill. Also, what it means to offer dialysis no matter how much time we have to live. Is it the right decision? Dr. Samra shares her amazing journey in...

I had the absolute pleasure of taking part in a workshop led by Eckhart Tolle on Winter Solstice on December 2020. I wanted to hear about his take about how we should manage our emotions around this much death and suffering around times of pandemic. I can't think of any other joy than having him quote my all time favorite book: The Little Prince. Enjoy this treat. 

We will all be hit by a serious illness diagnosis one day. How will we take that news? In a very heart touching episode, my dear friend and colleague, Dr. Sonal Haerter, shares her story of her father in law whom she lovingly calls her Dad. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and lived his life more than ever before. He taught her "The Value of Here and Now". She shares his story. 

In a very special Christmas episode, I want to share with you one of my more popular blog posts titled "Alicia".  While the details of the story of the patient is changed to protect his identity, Alicia is an actual person who was an angel personified that day for me. If you got to know her, you would agree with my assessment. I want us all to take a moment and appreciate oncology nurses during th...

What do you want to be when you grow up? What if that wouldn't give you much joy and you wanted to shift gears? My special guest today is a wildly popular financial blogger who happened to be a practicing anesthesiologist until very recently. Instead of buying into "The Sunk Cost Fallacy", he decided to pivot and creatively help the world in a totally different way-all while slow traveling the wor...

What if your beauty routine was owning one lipstick? I was asked to discuss financial matters that relate to handling end of life. Do we live our bucket list and spend money because of FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) or do we save money for the rainy days ahead and appreciate JOMO (Joy of Missing Out)? I share my perspective of "Save and Savor" as far as relating to my attitude regarding finance and in...

It is unbelievable. Truly, if you have never heard of it, you may be thinking this is an urban legend or conspiracy theory of sorts. I wish your intuition was right. In a stranger than fiction episode, let Dr. Gilcrease tell you about the atrocities of a government that forcefully removes organs of its prisoners of conscience to sell to the rest of the world. Prepare to be shocked and find yoursel...

I wonder why is it that the oncologists are often the "Last Man" standing? When patients have no more options for life prolonging measures, they still want the final word to come from their oncologists and not their own free will. Dr. Gilcrease masterfully answers these difficult questions that we all struggle with. In a very heart felt episode, he shares all his highs and lows caring for his dyin...

Palliative is from the Latin word pallium , which means cloak. When patients receive palliative care, they are cloaked with care and comfort as they receive focused pain and symptom management. I think there is another way we can cloak ourselves: To practice gratitude. In this Thanksgiving episode, I share with you two ways you can live a more grateful existence. It is my appreciation for your pre...

'Name is Bond. James Bond'. Who does not get goose bumps when they hear those words? Yet when Sean Connery died last month, I had to ask myself: Did I know if he was still alive? There certainly was no mention or sighting of him. His wife released a statement that said he had dementia and it took its toll on him. "It was no life for him. He was not able to express himself in any way." She was happ...

As physicians, we often talk about 'Do No Harm'. We also know that culturally we associate feeding loved ones as loving them. Can these two ideas go against one another? Are there situations when inadvertently we feed our loved ones to death? When patients with end stage dementia are unable to swallow their food, how do we help family see that they are getting to the end of their road? Talking abo...

Hear the story of a patient who loved life so much that she wanted to live it her way until the very end. In this very special episode, we will listen to Dr. Deming from the last episode with her patient's daughter talk about Patsy. She was a fiercely independent woman who was very clear about her wishes. She was clear as to how she wanted to end her last chapter. Listening without judgment opens...

I am very excited to share my special guest's story on the podcast: Dr. Katie Deming, who practices radiation oncology in the Pacific Northwest. As a doctor treating female patients with breast and gynecological cancer with radiation, she makes deep connections with her cancer patients.  Listen to her story  as how having volunteered in a hospice home led her to where she is today. We ponder wheth...

Patients with serious illness often want to know how much time they have left to live. It helps them plan. How to live the rest of their lives on their own terms. Do they want to keep coming back and forth to the hospital? Or do they want to spend the rest of their lives at home instead? We talk about prognosis discussions when it is not a timed based focus but rather functional or unpredictable p...