Workplace Therapy with Dr. Abby Medcalf

You didn't hire them and you didn't choose them. In some cases, you wouldn't have them over for dinner if your life depended on it. And yet here you are, expected to collaborate, coordinate, and produce results together five days a week. Working with people you genuinely don't like is one of the most universal and least discussed workplace experiences. Today, I'm going to tell...

You care deeply about doing good work. You have high standards. You notice details other people miss and you hold yourself to a level of quality that, honestly, has served you well. And somewhere along the way, that same quality that made you good at your job started making your job miserable. Today I want to talk about perfectionism at work, not as a character flaw or a humblebrag, but as a speci...

Feedback is supposed to be one of the most useful tools at work. It's how we grow, how teams improve, how managers develop their people, how problems get surfaced before they become disasters. And yet most people either dread receiving it, avoid giving it, or deliver it so carefully that nothing useful gets communicated. Today, I’ll tell you the reason feedback is so hard (spoiler alert: it’s...

You can’t control your boss. You can’t change their personality, override their decisions, or make them manage you the way you wish they would. But you can absolutely influence how the relationship works, how much visibility you get, how well your needs are understood, and how much your contributions actually register. That’s what managing up is. It’s not manipulation. It’s not going around your b...

Someone pulls you aside after a meeting. They lean in. They've got something to tell you about a colleague, a decision that's coming, a rumor making the rounds. And you feel it, that pull. The slight quickening. The part of you that wants to know. Office gossip is one of those workplace dynamics that almost everyone participates in to some degree and almost no one feels good about. Today I...

Conflict with your boss has a clear power structure. Conflict with someone you manage has a clear direction of authority. But conflict with a peer? That's the one nobody really teaches you how to handle, because it sits in the most ambiguous territory at work, two people at roughly the same level, no one with formal authority over the other, and a problem that isn't going away. Today I&#39...

They said, "Fine." But it wasn't fine. You can tell by the way they said it, the email they copied three people on for no apparent reason, the "just checking in" that was actually a pointed reminder, the compliment that somehow left you feeling worse than an insult would have. Passive-aggressive behavior at work is one of the most maddening dynamics to deal with because it'...

Last episode, I told you why you can't stop people-pleasing at work. Today, I'm giving you what to actually say because knowing the pattern isn't enough. When your boss drops something on your desk at 4pm Friday, or a colleague asks you to cover for them again, or you're sitting in a meeting watching a bad decision get made and nobody's pushing back, you need words. Ones that d...

You say yes when you mean no. You take on work that isn't yours because saying no feels too risky. You soften feedback until it loses its meaning, apologize for things that aren't your fault, and spend more energy managing other people's emotions than doing your actual job. And the strangest part? You know you're doing it. You can see it happening in real time. And you still can&#3...

You got the promotion. You have the experience. You've done this job a hundred times. And yet there's a voice in your head that's convinced today is the day everyone finds out you have no idea what you're doing. That's imposter syndrome, and it's not a sign that you're actually incompetent. It's a sign that your nervous system is doing something very specific, somet...

It's Sunday afternoon. The sun is still out. You haven't even finished your coffee. And somehow, work is already ruining your day. That knot in your stomach, the scrolling to avoid your own thoughts, the creeping dread that starts sometime around 3pm and just gets louder, then maybe you don’t get good sleep on Sunday nights. Today I'm going to show you why it happens and the specific s...

If work feels pointless, your motivation isn’t the problem. Your meaning system is. Today you’ll learn why your brain shuts down when your job feels empty, the psychology behind modern workplace meaninglessness, and the tools that help you reconnect to purpose even when the work itself doesn’t change. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/how-to-stay-motiva...

When you’re overwhelmed, even simple decisions feel impossible. Today you’ll learn why your brain shuts down under pressure, what decision fatigue really is, and the tools that help you think clearly when everything feels like too much. Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/how-to-make-decisions-when-youre-overwhelmed   Download The Clarity Compass: A Tool for Deciding When You’re Over...

Some coworkers drain your energy the second they walk into the room. Today you’ll learn the science behind emotional contagion, why certain people hijack your nervous system, and the practical tools that help you stay grounded and productive without getting pulled into their chaos.   Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/how-to-deal-with-draining-coworkers   Protect Your Energy! Downlo...

Psychological safety isn’t about being nice. It’s about creating an environment where people feel safe to speak up without fear. Today you’ll learn what psychological safety actually is, why your brain depends on it, and how you can build it in your team even if you’re not in charge. ____________________________   Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/how-to-create-psychological-safety...

If you hate conflict, speaking up at work can feel impossible. Today, you’ll learn why your brain shuts down when you try to advocate for yourself, why conflict feels so intense for you, how to regulate yourself before conversations, and the communication strategies that help you advocate for yourself without spiraling. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com...

If you work with someone who always thinks they’re right, every conversation turns into a battle. Today you’ll learn the psychology behind their behavior, what’s happening in your brain when you deal with them, and the tools that help you communicate, set boundaries, and stop getting pulled into power struggles. _________   Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/how-to-work-with-someone...

If your boss watches every move you make, checks in constantly, or “fixes” work you’ve already done, it’s not just annoying. It’s activating your nervous system. Today you’ll learn why people micromanage, what’s happening in your brain when it happens, and how to respond without getting defensive, shutting down, or blowing up. _________   Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/how-to-de...

You probably think you resist change because it’s inconvenient, annoying, or badly rolled out. But that’s not the real story. When something shifts at work, your nervous system runs a threat assessment before your conscious mind ever weighs in. Today you’ll learn the biological and psychological reasons change feels harder than it “should,” plus specific tools to move through it without spiraling,...

If you’ve been feeling flat, foggy, unmotivated, or just not quite yourself lately, I want you to hear this clearly. It might not be your mindset, your motivation, your relationship or even your stress. It might be that your brain is literally not getting the light it needs to function well. Today we’re talking about light therapy. I’m coming at you with the research, tips, warnings (it’s not for...

If you’ve ever told yourself, “I just need better time management,” I want you to understand that your problem isn’t time. You can’t manage time. It moves at the same pace for everyone. What you can manage is your attention, and that’s where things are breaking down.   You’re not scattered because you’re weak. You’re scattered because your brain is overwhelmed by the constant flood of information,...

If you’ve been feeling the slow, persistent ache of burnout or the creeping suspicion that your work owns you more than you own your life, you’re not alone. There’s a rising movement in the workplace that’s not laziness and not disengagement. It’s something much more intentional. Career minimalism. People aren’t just burned out. They’re waking up. They’re realizing that work became the main charac...

If you're waiting for your manager to notice all the great things you’ve done this year, you might be waiting a long time. Year-end reviews aren’t just performance check-ins, they’re visibility checks. And if you’re not showing up with receipts, strategy, and confidence, you could be leaving money, respect, and future opportunities on the table. In today’s episode, I’ll show you how to advocat...

Are you about to drag unresolved drama, resentment, or burnout from this year straight into your fresh new start? Stop right there. Before you haul that baggage into January, I’ve got three powerful questions to help you hit reset, find clarity, and finally break the cycle. This isn’t about pretending everything’s fine; it’s about freeing yourself from the emotional hangover of this past work year...

You’ve probably been told to set SMART goals. Maybe you’ve tried time-blocking, habit stacking, vision boarding... and yet you’re still burned out, overwhelmed, or just plain unmotivated. What if I told you that the most effective way to create goals at work, whether you’re a manager, new hire, or solopreneur, is to start with how you want to feel ? That’s right. Before you even write a single to-...