We Hate Movies

In this week's episode, the gang heads back to snowy Maine with Thomas Jane and Jason Lee in the fart filled, Stephen King adaptation, Dreamcatcher ! Really, what is with all the farting? Was Stephen King just recycling all his old ideas to make one super-sized Stephen King novel? And why does the military have to get involved? Plus: Wilford Brimley accidentally votes Carter in '76. Dreamcatcher s...

In this week's episode, the gang travels to Montreal - or do they stay in New York? - to ride alongside Gary Busey in the geographically confused art thriller, Canvas ! Have there ever been two less convincing actors playing New York Italians? How are the cops not on to Gary Busey this whole time? And does this film take place in Montreal or New York? PLUS: This movie's bullshit, Indy! Canvas star...

In this week's episode, the gang takes a creepy trip south to point and stare at Michael Caine in the incredibly disturbing Blame It On Rio ! Why is there a parrot in almost every shot? Has Michael Caine ever been seedier? And why doesn't Demi Moore step in and stop this madness? Plus: Is there anything you can't blame on Rio? Blame It On Rio stars Michael Caine, Michelle Johnson, Joseph Bologna,...

In this week's episode, the gang gets ready to break up some nostalgia with the insanely terrifying, family in peril thriller, Mrs. Doubtfire ! Why does this movie need to tack on the anti-smoking message? How does Robin Williams not see that divorce a mile away? And why does he make Harvey Fierstein design all those other disguises if he knows he's going as Mrs. Doubtfire? Plus: We open Alcatraz...

In this week's episode, the gang heads down to the Big Easy with JCVD and Wilford Brimley in the 1993 action pseudo-classic, Hard Target ! What is going on with all these accents? Is Lance Henriksen the Devil? And can everyone agree to stop saying "Daddy"? Plus: Wilford insists on doing all of his own stunts. Hard Target stars Jean-Claude Van Damme, Lance Henriksen, Yancy Butler, Arnold Vosloo and...

In this week's episode, the gang hits the stage at the People's Improv Theater to rag on one of the 1980's hunkiest flubs, Masters of the Universe ! Why does it feel like we're starting with a sequel to a different He-Man movie? Who OK'd that Skeletor makeup? And why is there so little He-Man in this movie? Plus: He-Man, arch nemesis of Richard Nixon. Masters of the Universe stars Dolph Lundgren,...

In this week's episode, the gang kicks off another Listener Request Month with 1985's amazing, karate-feuled, revenge film, Pray for Death ! Why would you leave behind a lucrative promotion to open a terrible restaurant in another country? What's with Limehouse's love of costumed shenanigans? And where did that chainsaw come from? Plus: Saito's revenge rampage runs awfully close to Batman's origin...

In this week's episode, the gang caps off their Worst of 2013 month with a trip to Mother Russia in the laziest chapter in the Book of McClane yet, A Good Day to Die Hard ! How is John McClane Sr. a terminator in this movie? How do you do a Die Hard movie without a memorable villain? And how does McClane not know how the CIA works? Plus: Meet John's older, more successful, Louisiana born brother,...

In this week's episode, the gang welcomes Blame it on Outer Space 's Ben Worcester to the show as they dissect the incredibly boring Ethan Hawke thriller, Getaway ! Why did they think so much hyper editing was a good thing? Who thought Selena Gomez was a believable street tough? And why would you only show Jon Voight's lips? Plus: Breakin' Necks with Gerard Butler! Getaway stars Ethan Hawke, Selen...

In this week's episode, the gang has their jaws on the floor with the incredibly wrongheaded, totally embarrassing, Easy Rider: The Ride Back . Where does that 9/11 reference come from? How many flashback threads can you squeeze into one film? And most importantly - WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA? Plus: Dennis Hopper and John Candy as vengeful poltergeists out for cinematic revenge! Easy Rider:...

In this week's episode, the gang kicks off their Worst of 2013 month with the totally snooze-worthy, secret M. Night Shyamalan film, After Earth ! Could the acting get any stiffer? Why is Lil' General getting jammed down our throats? And where are those aliens they kept talking about at the beginning? Plus: America's fastest growing quiz sensation - " After Earth or Oblivion ?" After Earth stars J...

In this week's episode, the gang says goodbye to 2013 by digging to the center of the earth with 2003's sci-fi snooze, The Core ! How much inaccurate science can you fit in one movie? How much scenery can The Tucc chew? And why is Aaron Eckhart screaming so much? Plus: Temperatures in excess of nine THOUSAND degrees! The Core stars Aaron Eckhart, Hilary Swank, Stanley Tucci, Delroy Lindo, Bruce Gr...

In this very merry Christmas episode, the gang gets in the holiday spirit with the completely insane Arnold/Sinbad holiday loon-fest, Jingle All the Way ! Why does no one discipline that terrible Jake Lloyd? How many times can one movie say, "Turbo Man?" And how in the world is Sinbad not getting the Chair at the end of this film? Plus: Jim Belushi's Mediocre Lieutenant! Jingle All the Way stars A...

In this week's episode, the gang takes a walk through the graveyard with creepy Macaulay Culkin and not as creepy Elijah Wood in the eerie child thriller, The Good Son ! What is David Morse really doing on that trip to Tokyo? How are these two parents allowed to have children? And how are all those cars crashing and no one sees a thing? Plus: Marc Summers' Child Bootcamp. The Good Son stars Macaul...

On the pilot episode of ANIMATION DAMNATION , the gang launches straight into hell with He-Man and She-Ra: A Christmas Special ! How many action figure advertisements can you squeeze into one hour-long special? Why does Skeletor need to understand the meaning of Christmas? And most importantly, what the hell's going on in this cartoon? Plus: Never steal the last energy drink from your redneck dad....

On this very special third anniversary show, the gang's all here, on the air to rant about the nostalgia-tainted, comedy-free sequel, Ghostbusters II ! Why wasn't the focus centered on the comedy? Why not make a new movie instead of a carbon copy of the original? And how on Earth does the entire cast treat Winston like such crap? Plus: Egon Spengler, slime sex offender. Ghostbusters II stars Ernie...

In this week's episode, the gang hangs out with Emmanuelle Beart and Michael E. Knight in the heavenly romantic comedy, Date with an Angel ! Why decide to make this angel chirp like a pigeon instead of speak? Is this movie really trying to say a 1987 Phoebe Cates is ugly? And how on Earth is this guy friends with those three jackasses? Plus: Peter Falk takes us in our sleep. Date with an Angel sta...

In this week's episode, the gang is cold on the trail of the Copycat Killer with Holly Hunter and Sigourney Weaver in the 1995 cyber-ish thriller, Copycat ! Could the cops in this movie be any more useless? Did we really need that newspaper in the hallway gag? And where in the hell did that Chinese gang come from? Plus: Dermot Mulroney and Dylan McDermott meld into one, handsome being. Copycat sta...

In this week's episode, the gang heads to Utah to kick ass and run for Sheriff with Cynthia Rothrock in the karate classic, China O'Brien ! Did anyone notice this is pretty much Walking Tall minus Joe Don Baker? Was that sex slavery storyline really necessary? And is that clearly Australian character really not supposed to be Australian? Plus: Fat and lazy Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles troll the In...

In this week's episode, the gang goes a few leagues under the sea with Sam Jackson and Tom Jane in the 1999 sharksploitation flick, Deep Blue Sea ! How did this movie get away with ripping off Jurassic Park so bad? Why was that huge window a window and not a viewfinder? And how is Saffron Burrows letting so many people go party on the eve of their experiment? Plus: The Tea Party has a time tunnel...

In this week's episode, the gang kicks off November's "Stay Tuned" month with 1992's witty send up of television culture, the aptly titled, Stay Tuned ! How does John Ritter not immediately know that Jeffrey Jones is working for the Devil? Who thought these show parodies were funny? And why does the Lord of Darkness need a television network? Plus: Don Pardo and Robert Stack impressions abound! St...

One last scary treat for this year's Spooktacular because we're always so sad to see it go! Recorded live (poorly) at the People's Improv Theater in New York City, the gang lays out their issues with Wes Craven's third, and worst, entry into his serial killer franchise, Scream 3 ! Whose idea was it for all the cameos? That mom was clearly making porn, right? And just who was asking for that Jamie...

In this week's episode, the gang wraps up their 2013 Halloween Spooktacular with the insanely stupid, live action ghost romp, Casper ! How can this movie have so little rules set up for the ghosts? Was there ever a more annoying trio than these three obnoxious uncles? And how many of you were watching Hard Copy in the mid-90s? PLUS: Heckling Dan Aykroyd at a liquor warehouse. Casper stars Bill Pul...

In this week's episode, the gang heads back to one of the greatest places in human civilization, the mall in the 1980s, with the killer robot flick, Chopping Mall ! Why would a mall spend this much money on a security system? Are folks really okay with that kind of furniture store party? And are there various tiers of janitors? Plus: Never put out your robotic college roommate. Chopping Mall stars...

In this week's episode, the gang goes back to the Stephen King well with the horror-less horror anthology, Cat's Eye ! Where is Alan King getting the funding for this enterprise? Why is the cat seeing Drew Barrymore's ghost everywhere? And who on Earth needed that troll running around? Plus: Louie Anderson eats cat hot dogs. Cat's Eye stars James Woods, Alan King, Robert Hays and Drew Barrymore; d...