We Hate Movies

Recorded 11.15.22 at Wiseguys in Salt Lake City, UT On the second Summer Break episode of August, the guys are live in SLC chatting about the outrageous erotic thriller, Fatal Attraction ! What’s with Michael Douglas’s character feeding his dog spaghetti with meat sauce? Why couldn’t they put a little paranormal stuff in this movie? Has dishwater ever been sexy? And is Dan Gallagher the dumbest ph...

On this month’s W❤️M, it’s the long-awaited discussion about the fantastic comic book adaptation, the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! How incredibly gross is this movie? Aren’t the Henson puppets amazing? What is Shredder’s ultimate end game here? Do the turtles live next door to any—WHOA, DUDE! This episode is totally for our radical subscribers only!  To access the full show, subscriber t...

Recorded 5.22.23 at the world-famous Hollywood Improv in Los Angeles, CA On the first Summer Break episode of the season, the guys are live in Los Angeles tackling the outrageous Ivan Reitman comedy, Twins ! Why is it that Arnold’s character knows a ton of science-related facts, but has no idea what a phone or seatbelt is? Did they really have to go that hard on Danny in the screenplay? And what i...

On the final On-Screen Live before our summer hiatus, we're giving our reviews of Greta Gerwig’s Barbie and Christopher Nolan’s Oppenheimer, analyzing the weekend box office, reacting to the new trailers for Alexander Payne’s, The Holdovers  and Nia DaCosta’s The Marvels, going over the record-setting weekend box office, and more! On-Screen Live  will return in September! Thanks so much for tuning...

On this episode, it’s the season 13 finale as the guys finally get around to one of the most infamous flops of all time, The Postman ! Why couldn’t Costner see that this needed to be cut down? Did he have any moment where he considered not playing the main character while also directing? And how many times are people screaming “Postman!” In this movie? PLUS: The guys consider celebrity prize fight...

On this On-Screen Live , the guys are going over the weekend box office, chatting about Mission: Impossible - Dead Reckoning Part 1 , reacting to trailers for Wonka and Ahsoka , and covering a couple Secret Movies™️ including the Christian possession horror, Nefarious ! This is of course the audio-only edition of  On-Screen Live , if you want the full experience, check out the show on our YouTube...

On this week’s show, it’s the penultimate episode of the season as the guys welcome back friend of the show and Vulture writer, Angelica Jade Bastién to chat about the abysmal teen sex comedy sequel, American Pie 2 ! Does this movie qualify as a Boob Comedy? Are these guys even friends who still like each other? And shouldn’t some of these characters been written out for the sequel? PLUS: Doctor S...

On this On-Screen Live , the guys are chatting about Insidious: The Red Door , addressing Hugh Jackman's Yellow Wolverine costuming in Deadpool 3 , reacting to the second Dune: Part Two and full Killers of the Flower Moon & Napoleon trailers, checking the weekend box office & more! This is of course the audio-only edition of  On-Screen Live , if you want the full experience, check out the...

On this week’s show, the Summer Blockbuster Extravaganza continues with the gang chatting about the fun studio chop job, Mission: Impossible II ! Will the Woo Cut ever see the light of day? How incredible is the spectacle level jump from the last movie to this one? And why couldn’t they cast a few more… memorable actors for some of these supporting roles? PLUS: If Tom Holland starred in a Ronin re...

On this month’s W❤️M episode, the gang chats about the incredible espionage action flick that started it all, Brian De Palma’s Mission: Impossible ! How many members of the original TV cast either walked out of or outright refused to see this movie due to brand loyalty? How great are all these practical make-up disguises for Cruise? And is George Lucas responsible for—hey now! This episode is for...

On this week's On-Screen Live , the guys take a quick break from the long holiday weekend to go over the weekend box office, react to trailers like the one for the new Liam Neeson sit-down action movie, Retribution , chat about current releases like No Hard Feelings , FX's The Bear , and one of the summer's most anticipated films, Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny ! This is of course the audio...

On this week’s episode, the Summer Blockbuster Extravaganza heads to Toon Town as the guys welcome Bob Mackey and Henry Gilbert back to the program to chat about the totally abysmal live-action/animation hybrid, Garfield ! Was Bill Murray that much of a ‘get’ for this movie that the studio accepted this disinterested, nothing vocal performance? Why is Garfield shaking his ass to the Black Eyed Pea...

On this edition of On-Screen Live , the guys are chatting about The Flash , Asteroid City , Marvel's Secret Invasion (including its bullshit opening sequence), Extraction II , the trailer for Kraven the Hunter , the weekend box office, another edition of Secret Movie , and more! This is of course the audio-only edition of  On-Screen Live! , if you want the full experience, check out the show on ou...

The 2023 Summer Blockbuster Extravaganza goes to Adventure Movie Land this week as the guys chat about the iffy-but-fun 1984 prequel, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom ! As much as this film has some great scenes and set pieces, that dinner scene was, is, and always shall be wretched ! But, how fantastic is Ke Huy Quan’s performance in this, along with his great chemistry with Ford? Is Willie S...

The Summer Blockbuster Extravaganza goes shopping this week as the gang welcomes back friend of the show, Ben Worcester to chat about the not-great comedy, Paul Blart: Mall Cop ! Why is 90% of this film’s comedy just poking fun at Kevin’s weight? Is Paul Blart a perfect Todd Solondz character? And is there anything more dated in this film than all the Segway comedy? Maybe the playing of Rock Band?...

On this week's On-Screen Live! , the guys are looking over the weekend box office (will Spider-Verse continue its run on top or will the Maximals reign supreme?), chatting about new releases (Netflix's Arnold doc, anyone?), picking their fave sketches from this season of I Think You Should Leave, reacting to some new trailers (like EXPEND4BLES , lol), and more, including a brief wrap-up of this ye...

The Summer Blockbuster Extravaganza goes to Red Alert for this special Emergency Episode all about the brand-new Transformers motion picture, Transformers: Rise of the Beasts ! Caution: if you have not yet seen this movie, we’re talking a blue streak about it this week, so yes, spoilers abound! Hey, why do these Maximals have hair? Why does Unicron look like a giant chocolate starfish? Who can we...

For the kick-off of the 2023 Summer Blockbuster Extravaganza , the guys are racing to save the land of Fantasia with a convo about the popular 1980s children’s film, The NeverEnding Story ! Who is the bigger Disgusting Shit Boy (DSB) here, Bastian or Atreyu? How much does Bastian’s rotten father hate his little bookworm guts? And why didn’t they just fork over the cash and actually cast Ernest Bor...

On this month’s globetrotting W❤️M, the guys are chatting about the wildly good adventure sequel, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade ! Is River Phoenix’s haircut period appropriate? Did Marcus Brody get brain damage in Venice? And how in the world did they not immediately see that—LOOK OUT, INDY! This episode is for subscribers only! To access the full show, along with countless hours of bonus con...

Recorded live at the Royal Theatre, Toronto, ON, Canada, 10.27.22 On this week’s episode, it’s the gang’s raucous live show from their Canadian debut where they talked a blue streak all about the abysmal horror sequel, Saw IV ! Is John Kramer the single person keeping the mini tape recorder business going? Why did they cast so many dull, brown-haired dudes to play all these faceless, monosyllabica...

On this week’s episode, the guys are talking about a movie that originally took place in 2006, but now thanks to useless retconning is supposed to take place around 2013, The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift ! How dare they use “Bawitaba” in its entirety like this? Should Kid Rock take his own advice to get in the pit and try to love someone? And how was it that Steve wound up seeing Kid Rock liv...

On this week's ON-SCREEN LIVE! the guys are chatting about movies, shows and games they experienced over the weekend like Blackberry, The Muppets Mayhem, and The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom ! They're also reacting to trailers for Meg 2: The Trench and Arnold , analyzing the weekend box office, taking a look at a super-terrible SECRET MOVIE , and more!  This is of course the audio-only ed...

On this episode, the guys are left scratching their heads over the “prestige zombie drama” World War Z ! How checked-out was Brad for this one? Couldn’t they have found anything for Mireille Enos to do besides sit by a phone and mope? And good gravy, what are we doing with that Pepsi machine at the end? PLUS: Gal Gadot adopts North Korea’s anti-zombie protocol!  World War Z stars Brad Pitt, Mireil...

This week on On-Screen Live! the guys are chatting about Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 , reacting to trailers for Dune: Part Two, Insidious: The Red Door and A Haunting in Venice , unearthing a couple of Secret Movies , dissecting the weekend box office, and more! Be sure to catch us on the road starting next week when we play shows in San Francisco and Los Angeles—L.A. is sold out, so San Franci...

On this episode, the gang talks about the entertaining as all get-out and totally regular Pauly Shore comedy, Son In Law ! Is this the undisputed best Pauly Shore movie? How hilarious is that Flea cameo? Does this movie work without the incredible supporting cast, including the great Lane Smith? And why bother forbidding the Weasel from being an on-screen stoner?! PLUS: Lane Smith feuds with Kevin...