V'Ger Please!

Our girl Dax goes 0-3 on the season as we review the dissapointing "Facets"! A fun theater kid idea of 'have the cast play all of the Dax hosts' meanders around for around 30 minutes before figuring out what the plot actually is. Can this episode be saved by Rom dropping a fantastic WWE promo on Quark in defense of his son? Probably not!

We take a quick detour into our Patreon vaults (due to podcaster illness) and share our review of Joseph's favorite piece of Star Trek media - "The Undiscovered Country"! When the Klingons get a bad case of the Space Chernobyls, we get a film that serves as the true entrypoint of 'realpolitik Trek'. We get Shakespeare quoting bad guys, prison breaks, dramatic space battles, and Cold War political...

When the government of Bajor has another case of the yips, Kira meets up with her old murderin' friends with great hair as we review "Shakaar"! We get a real mixed bag of an episode as Kai Winn gives a straight up supervillan speech, the surface of Azeroth actually looks a bit messed up for a change, a disposable darts based B plot...all resulting in a jumble that is less then the sum of its parts...

Season's Greetings and Good Will Towards Profit as we review "Family Buisness"! When 'ol Jeff of Many Faces shows up as the local Ferengi IRS agent, Quark and Rom deal with the consequences of their mom being a buisness genius. Meanwhile, every member of the DS9 crew is conspiring with Jake to get Sisko hooked up with a local space trucker while comitting some light criminal activity.

When the boss grows a beard and gets a fun new hobby, it's going to be a good time for your hosts as we review "Explorers"! After a brief visit to Bajor, Ben comes up with a very suspect new construction project while bonding with Jake, Bashir has a wierd subplot but at least he gets drunk with Miles, and Gul Dukat begins his Friendship Arc. 

In an extra lengeth episode, we dive into the depts of every part of the true beginning of the best Trek ever made - "The Die is Cast"! Garak has made the classic error of thinking he can go back to work at the job that fired him last time, Sisko provides a perfect demonstration of Starfleet General Order 2, and Odo proves exactly how good a man he has become. 

At long last the good show that Deep Space Nine has been starts to transform into the great show it is destined to be as we watch and review "Improbable Cause"! Garak has a big all kabloom go off in his shop, Odo proves himself the best detective, and we dig deep on the galactic geopolitics to come. 

The force of nature we call Death Row Sisko gets a free pass to visit his personal Westworld as we review the second DS9 Mirror Universe entry "Through the Looking Glass"! Smiles picks the right man for the job when he rolls by ops to get Sisko to play his evil opposite. Our man gets to save his 'wife' while banging the evil version of his hot coworkers? Oh heck yeah!

It's all fun and games until the local Danger Level Alpha alien drug dealer decides to psychic assault you as we review "Distant Voices"! This one is definitly a bit of a stinker as we debate the old age makeup, retroactive continuity, and spend mot of our time figuring out how to re-write it...but is it reallt worse than a Chakotay episode? 

When our local blue collar hero gets a case of the Time Blips, it turns into a tight, continuity heavy adventure as we review "Visonary"! The Romulans are here - shoulder pads and all - to get that sweet intel, Bashir is the worst best friend, and you find all about how to ace your next worker's comp audit from Peter! No seriously, it maks sense!

The galaxy's most legendary bartender decides to cold call the space gods as we review "Prophet Motive." After Zek shows up filled with all the wrong kings of Martin Luther energy, Quark and Rom have to figure out how to get orthadoxy settled back into position. You might think this one is bad, but hey, can any episode where Quark is this shamelessly working his magic is without value?

If you know us, then you know we could never resist reviewing a movie starring Andrew Robinson and making deals with demons! Happy Haloween from your hosts, and please enjoy this review of the 80's horror classic "Hellraiser", featuring mild mannered Garak and plenty of stories from your hosts explaining the LARP world and being the Infernal Fun Police. 

That whole bit about Ben Sisko accidentaly becoming Space Jesus comes back around as we get a flavor of the divine in "Destiny". They manage to thread the needle as both Joseph AND Peter walk away happy with a spiritual focused episode while Siko and Kira navigate prophecy. Meanwhile. O'Brian once again lines up a 90's hottie without even trying. 

It turns our that this show is so good, that even a money saver dialogue heavy epiosde in the Hell Caves is still going to be a banger as we review "Heart of Stone". We find Odo in a moment of crisis when he, Kira, and Special Guest Star Runabout wind up getting vicitimized by bad special effects. Meanwhile the B plot actually works this time as Nog figures out the Food and Bev industry might not...

Once in a great while you get two great stories, even if they really shouldn't have happened at the same time as we review "Life Support." So yeah, it might be a tonal mismatch to have the tragic, deep, deadly medical drama featuring Space Pope Karen paired with zany Nog and Jake dating subplots featuring Bayside graduates. But hey, both are good!

We go deep and meta on trek and ourselves as we revisit where V'Ger Please started as we revisit the Voyager pilot, "Caretaker"! Quark gives the ship a deserving farewell from DS9 as we dig deep on our thoughts about the episode - and Voyager as a whole - with seven and a half years of additional context (and much better microphones). 

We review the second half of the all-to-timely "Past Tense, Part II". Ben and Julian need to make sure a terrible act of political violence takes place to ensure the timeline stays in-tact while helping everyone involved retain their empathy. Boy, sounds like science fiction more than ever, am I right?

What's that, we have to review an episode about urban crime, class divides, and deep questions of humanity? Oh and it takes place of the 'future' of 2024? Well 'that won't be awkward at all as we review "Past Tense, Part 1"! Just remember one important thing - Dax is prepared to be a con artist in any time or place. 

Hey everyone, do you like Shakespeare? What about The Lesser Troi? No one? Well too bad, because we are reviewing "Facination"! Deep Sheetz Nine is having a groovy slice of life episode with some sort of new years thing, but then our favorite(!) ambassador shows up and everyone gets a case of the horny. It's wacky! It's also somehow...not the worst?

Poor Major Kira, she's overworked, she stressed, she needs a break. so it will be just when the doctor ordered when good 'ol Commander Riker shows up...right? We finally review "Defiant" and find out if Peter managed to stay pure, go deep on the Tom Riker question, and find out why you don't let the CIA have an actual army. 

We find a way to not talk about this episode as much as possible as we review classic DS9 stinker "Meridian"! We get to experience the joy of Dax retrofit into a Troi plot, unearned emotion like it's a DISCO episode, and Jeffery Combs show up to do naughty cybercrimes with Quark. 

Everyone gets in on the action as we review the most improbably perfect comedy episode Trek has ever produced as we review "Civil Defense". After Deep Sheetz Nine turns into a pro level Cardassian escape room, can our crew outwit Dukat's incredible Bioware-style dialogue trees? Also, who was that guy who just got zapped to ashes during our wacky nonsense?

Everyone is dealing with the consequences of parenthood this week as we review "The Abandoned". So the A plot with Odo uncovering the horror of his people is great and all, but we need to have an immediate conversation about Jake 'Pool Shark' Sisko. This young  lad is out here pulling Alpha Quadrant Eights!

It's time for the ol' classic 'your life is fake/a lie' get a new twist as we review "Second Skin"! When Kira gets a replimat call no one would want, she winds up a pawn in a much bigger game, Garak commits his first crimes for Starfleet, and we decide if the Obsidian Order is either galaxy brain genius or Scooby-Doo level idiots. 

We get another solid dose of detail on Trill where Jadzia spends the principal part of the episode out of the action as we review "Equilibrium"? Seriously, why were the DS9 writers so bad at this? How did the manage to make Quark a fantastic loverboy but somehow every single time it's Trill Time they give us underbaked nonsense where the focus character has no agency over her existence? WHY DID YO...