Very Good Enough
Very Good Enough
Very good is a moving target, but we think you can be a very good (enough) parent if you love your kids and try hard. Join mother of three Jess Hover and preschool teacher Layne Deyling Cherland as we tackle how to understand toddler behavior from THEIR perspective, how to build a non-judgmental community of moms, how to repair our mistakes and have healthy relationships with our partners/kids/selves, plus so much more of what we call "people stuff". We take care of the people who take care of children - moms, dads and everyone else! From Very Good Mothers ClubTheme by Conner Cherland
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Episodes
BONUS | Blended family struggles 05.04.2024 12:49
This week's listener question: I am 32. I have an 8 month old daughter. I live with my long term partner who is her father. He has two children aged 12, boy, and 8, girl, that live primarily with their mother, but we have them over every other weekend. Though my partner and I have made a multitude of opportunities to better co-parent, there has been no success. We don't agree with the bad...
More Than Memes | Why the internet gets parenthood wrong with Claire Edwards 02.04.2024 55:39
We had the BEST time talking to Claire Edwards, mom of two known for being very funny on TikTok, about why the internet's negative portrayal of parenting isn't telling the whole story. Claire opens up about how scared she was to become mom because the internet made it look terrible (think: videos of moms having a breakdown in the Target parking lot). Claire shares why she's loving moth...
BONUS | Who had it first? 29.03.2024 8:25
This week's listener question is in response to our previous episode "Toddlers Can't Share | Why forced sharing leads to people pleasing": I have a 2.5yo and an almost 4yo, and they sometimes snatch toys etc but often the play nicely, so I'm not always watching - so what if they are fighting over a toy and I didn't see 'who had it first'? What do you do in that in...
Childcare vs. Mom | Debunking myths & finding the perfect fit for your child 26.03.2024 1:00:41
Is daycare bad for my child? This episode tackles common childcare concerns like developmental benefits and choosing the right program. We explore the effects of childcare at different ages, from infancy to preschool, and answer your burning questions: Does preschool impact school readiness? What's the difference between daycare and preschool? What questions to ask when choosing a program? How...
BONUS | How to stay calm and help my toddler through their big feelings 22.03.2024 23:26
This week's listener question is in response to our previous episode "Whole Brain Child | How to boost your child's brain development": Question 1. I have a 3 year old (will be 4 in May) who I would love to figure out better. I feel like I kinda failed him when it comes to the regulating emotion piece. I used to (and still often do) get very flustered at his big emotions. I wish...
You Matter | How to overcome people pleasing and get your needs met 19.03.2024 50:12
Do you get praised for being "easy" or "going with the flow" but deep down, feel exhausted? Us, too. In this episode, we explore the hidden costs of people pleasing. We discuss how this behavior is rooted in childhood experiences and the belief that our needs are a burden. We unpack the connection between people pleasing and codependency, and how we often absorb discomfort to k...
Toddlers Can't Share | Why forced sharing leads to people pleasing 12.03.2024 1:02:34
This week the girls chat about Layne's viral reel on why sharing is not developmentally appropriate for toddlers and how forcing them to share actually leads to people pleasing tendencies in adulthood. We discuss how conflict avoidance and the fear of being judged affect parenting choices. We lay out more age-appropriate ways to help toddlers negotiate shared space and materials, how to suppor...
BONUS - How to encourage a timid toddler to try new things 08.03.2024 14:09
This week's listener question: Trying to find the balance of how to encourage a timid toddler to try new things while not pushing too hard. Things as simple as going down a bigger slide at the playground, trying a new food, or jumping off the side of the pool into dad's arms. How can we foster bravery in our (especially extra timid) toddler while not pushing too hard? Email your questions...
Whole Brain-Child | How to boost your child's brain development 05.03.2024 59:01
This week Layne breaks down how a child's brain is wired, how it grows and how learning a little bit about it helps us raise calmer, happier kids. Different parts of a child's brain develop at different speeds and understanding these differences can reveal how to help your child through difficult feelings, how to respond to outbursts and how to support their growth into mentally well adult...
BONUS | How to honor your child's developmental rhythm and stop comparing 01.03.2024 12:22
This week's listener question: How to honor your child's own developmental rhythm and stop comparing to other children Email your questions to verygoodenoughpod@gmail.com Book a 1:1 coaching session with Layne: enquiryco.com/coaching Join Very Good Mothers Club to be a part of our community and join our live monthly calls (4th Tuesday of every month): https://verygoo...
Reclaiming Your Identity | Quigley Goode on Motherhood, Mental Health & Creativity 27.02.2024 1:11:43
Quigley Goode joins for this JUICY 🍊 convo about reclaiming your identity and charting your own course without letting the world define you. She shares her journey from being on American Idol to leaving music and pursuing a career in social media and fashion. We dive deep into her motherhood journey from a pandemic pregnancy and absolutely CRAZY birth story to quarantining in the hospital with a...
BONUS | My toddler won't stop screaming 23.02.2024 16:04
This week's listener question: My daughter seems to have anger as a default emotion lately (crying emoji). There's no build up to her screaming. It's like everything she feels is a huge, shrill scream and it causes such a visceral reaction in me. I feel like there's nothing that seems to get her to stop screeching with rage. Email your questions to verygoodenoughpod@gmail.com Book...
I Want to Believe In Myself | How to have faith in your life direction 20.02.2024 1:04:43
Welcome back! We are starting Season 5 with a juicy, sweet, vulnerable conversation between two friends (plus you). We get an update on the "C" word about Jess' upcoming surgery (if you missed her cervical cancer announcement, check it out on Youtube ). Then Layne shares about the loss of her job which leads to a conversation about what it means to believe in yourself, how to stay th...
The Good Enough Mother | What does it really mean to be a good mom? [RE-RELEASE] 06.02.2024 54:10
This week Jess and Layne reveal why we named the podcast Very Good Enough. Jess talks about founding Very Good Mothers Club on the belief that a very good mom is someone who loves their kid and tries. Layne walks us through the Donald Winnicott's concept of "the good enough mother" and why being a good enough parent is better for your kids than being a perfect one (there's a real...
On vs IN | How to cultivate a sense of direction in life [RE-RELEASE] 30.01.2024 37:38
It’s easy to get stuck inside the experience of each day and let one string together with the next until they slip way from you. This is a conversation about coming up for air and looking around. Of course, you have to be “IN” your life and experience it in the present with your kids, your work, your passions. But you also have learn how to rise above the hustle, how to check in with yourself, how...
Play Is The Secret To Everything | The number one way to impact your child's life [RE-RELEASE] 23.01.2024 43:14
Play shapes every aspect of who your child is becoming and you might not even know what it really is. Do you want your child to have strong social/emotional skills, become a creative problem solver, be confident, have healthy relationships, develop cognitive skills for math and reading, grow strong motor skills and be empathetic? Not exaggerating – it ALL comes through play. This episode is Layne’...
Anger as Self-Love | Dr. Sam Rader on reconnecting with our natural instincts [RE-RELEASE] 16.01.2024 1:03:01
Dr. Sam Rader returns to teach us why anger is an essential part of love, how to recognize and express when our boundaries are violated and how to use our anger as fuel to get our lives where we want to them to go. She shows us how to keep our natural, healthy anger from becoming toxic and how to encourage our children to grow a healthy relationship with their own emotions. Sam gifts us with a gui...
BONUS | Reflections on Season 4 (and major life update) 12.01.2024 58:36
This week we debrief Jess' big announcement (we don't want to use the "C" word but check out the Youtube link below if you need to catch up) including our big feelings, insights into the timeline and a few big lessons we've already learned on this very new journey. We tease an interview that's coming next season because the conversation taught us so much about how to hand...
Rules Are Dumb | How to teach your kids more effectively (and EASILY) 09.01.2024 47:51
It's an opinionated week on the podcast: first we realize we've both had close encounters with reality TV and have spicy feelings about it, then Layne shares some hot takes about rules (not a fan). We deep dive into why it's more effective and EASIER to focus on teaching kids what they CAN do than trying to enforce a list of "rules". We discuss why traditional rules are too a...
Let Kids Be Small | Why NOW matters more than the future 02.01.2024 45:18
It's easy to wonder if we're doing enough to get kids ready for next stage in their lives. In this episode, we make a case for why the best way to prepare a child for the future is to let them be exactly where they are right now. We dive into why making your 3-year-old sit still will not actually get them ready for kindergarten, why you don't need to worry about memorizing the ABCs and...
BONUS | A note on Winter Solstice from Layne 22.12.2023 7:47
Happy Winter Solstice! Posting this bonus a night early because tonight is the longest night of the year and I woke up with some thoughts about that :) Join Very Good Mothers Club to be a part of our community and join our live monthly calls (4th Tuesday of every month)! Email your questions to layne@enquiryco.com Book a 1:1 coaching session with Layne HERE
Too Much "Yes" | How to break the cycle of toddler overindulgence 19.12.2023 1:04:56
We all want our kids to be happy and we all hate tantrums. But how much "yes" is good for them and when does appeasing to avoid tantrums start to damage our parent-child relationship? Weaving in lots of practical support and encouragement, Jess and Layne dig into why it feels impossible for some of us to stand up to our demanding little ones. We talk about ways our own childhoods affect...
Christmas Best Of | How to make the most of the holiday season with kids 12.12.2023 32:02
This week is a collection of the best advice for having a great holiday with your kids from the podcast so far. We cover topics like: How to define what you want at the holidays and avoid disappointment How to release the pressure to make holidays perfect Creating a calming and cozy holiday atmosphere at home Managing kids' expectations and avoiding overstimulation during the holiday season Ho...
Bonus | Big Toilet Potty Training Anxiety 08.12.2023 11:00
This week's listener question: Toddler anxiety around pooping on the potty/using the adult sized toilet. Join Very Good Mothers Club to be a part of our community and join our live monthly calls (4th Tuesday of every month)! Email your questions to layne@enquiryco.com Book a 1:1 coaching session with Layne HERE
Love + Tragedy | Vee King-Cunningham on rebuilding a beautiful life after loss 05.12.2023 1:10:04
We're joined this week by the captivating Vee King-Cunningham who shares the story of losing her husband in her twenties (while pregnant!), parenting while grieving, falling in love again and thriving as a blended family. She shares her experience of learning how to let people help you, how to process grief in your own personal way, and how to stay connected to the memory of someone who's...
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