Very Good Enough
Very Good Enough
Very good is a moving target, but we think you can be a very good (enough) parent if you love your kids and try hard. Join mother of three Jess Hover and preschool teacher Layne Deyling Cherland as we tackle how to understand toddler behavior from THEIR perspective, how to build a non-judgmental community of moms, how to repair our mistakes and have healthy relationships with our partners/kids/selves, plus so much more of what we call "people stuff". We take care of the people who take care of children - moms, dads and everyone else! From Very Good Mothers ClubTheme by Conner Cherland
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Episodes
La Fin | How to manage anxiety and a fond farewell 04.03.2025 42:02
In the final episode of Very Good Enough, Jess and Layne process some real-time anxiety (this was recorded during the LA fires--you'll hear an air purifier in the background), figure out how to land this plane and let you know what to expect from us in the future. We also talk about how to manage anxiety when the world feels too big by identifying what IS in your power to influence and then do...
The Unlived Life | Why your CHILDREN need to see you truly live 25.02.2025 39:25
This is the second to last episode of this podcast and we are in our feelings about it. BUT before we say goodbye, we have one last Carl Jung quote to unpack with you: "Nothing has a stronger influence psychologically...on their children than the unlived life of the parent." We go pretty deep on how to hear your own desires, what reparenting yourself actually looks like, the brain develo...
The Beginning of The End | Why we feel this podcast is complete 18.02.2025 44:43
Welcome, dear friends, to the first of three final episodes of Very Good Enough. After a long break, Jess and Layne are back together ready to share what this journey has been like from each of our perspectives and how we independently arrived at the conclusion that, well, it's time to conclude. We recorded these conversations during the height of the fires in LA so you'll hear about our e...
BONUS | Reflections on Season 6 (and current life seasons) 01.10.2024 50:12
Jess and Layne take some time to reflect on the conversations we've had with you over the course of this season. While Very Good Enough is on hiatus, you can still find us in REAL LIFE inside the Very Good Mothers Club community and join our live monthly calls (4th Tuesday of every month)! Find Jess at Jessica Hover on Youtube and @jess_ho...
Feeling Isolated In Motherhood? You're not alone. 24.09.2024 31:14
This episode digs into the isolating world of early parenthood. Jess and Layne explore why connecting with other moms (or literally anyone) is crucial for your mental and physical health and offer practical tips on building your support network. Learn how to combat "must be nice" syndrome--that creeping resentment towards partners or friends who seem to have it easier--and how friendship...
It's YOUR Crown | How to make confident parenting decisions 17.09.2024 44:08
Drawing inspiration from a scene in "The Crown," Jess and Layne explore the idea of stepping into your own authority as a parent and trusting yourself to make choices. Key topics include: Dealing with guilt and second-guessing yourself The importance of flexibility and learning from experiences Communicating confidently with your partner and family members We offer practical advice on ho...
The Power of Priority | Time management secrets for busy moms 10.09.2024 56:36
Jess invites Layne's husband, Conner Cherland, into the studio (it's our living room) for a discussion on time management and life balance. Conner's unique perspective as an artist and entrepreneur offers fresh approaches to common challenges faced by busy moms. We talk about: Practical time management strategies when you're overwhelmed How to prioritize your goals (even if your go...
We're Different | How to disagree without destroying relationships 03.09.2024 51:54
With the upcoming election adding extra tension to our lives, Layne and Jess dig into the challenge of maintaining relationships when core beliefs differ. We discuss: How to maintain relationships when we disagree on parenting styles, politics, or worldviews? Strategies for having meaningful conversations about sensitive topics Navigating family dynamics when personal beliefs evolve over time How...
BONUS | Answering your questions about "Fear + Force" 23.08.2024 51:42
You FLOODED our inbox over the last month with responses to our episode, "Fear + Force | Why we're leaving old school discipline styles behind." This week, Layne digs into your stories and questions. We cover: Is yelling ever ok as a parent? How do I get my toddler to listen? Is spanking child abuse? How to be in charge as the parent while still respecting my child's personhood H...
First Day of Preschool | Expert tips for a smooth transition 13.08.2024 1:02:56
Is your little one starting preschool soon? Jess and Layne share their strategies from both the experienced mom and preschool teacher perspectives. Learn how to: Prepare your child (and yourself) emotionally for the first day Handle separation anxiety and tearful goodbyes Communicate effectively with teachers Create a smooth drop-off routine Understand your child's behavior before and after sc...
Babies Not Bullies | How to understand and respond to toddler aggression 06.08.2024 51:19
Join us as we unpack a real-life playground incident and explore why labeling toddlers as 'mean' or 'bullies' misses the mark. We discuss why your little one's pushing or hitting is actually a direct route to getting what they want, not intentional meanness. We offer practical strategies for responding to aggressive behavior, setting boundaries, and teaching better tools. And w...
Tiny Therapist Tendencies | Why is my preschooler obsessed with MY feelings? 30.07.2024 36:01
Today we're answering listener questions about a common parenting challenge: how to respond when your child becomes hyper-focused on YOUR emotions. We explore: Why preschoolers suddenly become aware of and fixated on their parents' feelings Navigating situations where your child witnesses your sadness or stress The dangers of leaning on your child for emotional support and healthier altern...
Sad Mom | Parenting through mental health struggles 23.07.2024 48:42
We know mom's mental health has a huge impact on a child's emotional well-being, but the fact is: a lot of us have anxiety. Or postpartum depression. Or the other kind of depression. We're people. We struggle. So how do you parent well in the midst of mental health challenges? Today, Jess shares her personal journey with medication: what worked, what didn't and how to advocate for...
Fear + Force | Why we're leaving old-school discipline styles behind 16.07.2024 1:09:29
Is the constant power struggle leaving you drained? This week, Layne and Jess look at old-school methods of parenting that rely on fear and force to control children's behavior. We dive into how fear hinders internal motivation and discuss ways to foster cooperation. Jess shares her journey raising a strong-willed child, finding leadership without resorting to dominance. We discuss: The long-t...
Rest Before You're Sick | How to prioritize rest as a mom 09.07.2024 53:04
In this episode, Jess shares what she learned through surviving cervical cancer about why prioritizing your well-being is crucial for your entire family's health and happiness. We get into: Practical tips for communicating your needs to your partner How to identify what you truly need when feeling overwhelmed Why mom's wellness is essential for your family's functioning Easy ways to in...
Everybody Gets What They Need | How to respond when kids say "no fair" 02.07.2024 49:41
This week, Layne and Jess reframe fairness into a more powerful concept: equity, ensuring everyone gets what they need . We offer practical scripts to explain this concept to your child, and discuss how to navigate those inevitable one-toy toddler meltdowns. This episode dives into: Why "no fair" complaints emerge around age 3 and how it relates to brain development Understanding the dif...
Things "Gone Good" | An even deeper dive into the secret of loving your life 25.06.2024 1:01:30
To kick off Season 6, Jessica and Layne revisit the transformative power of loving your life, even amidst the challenges of raising young children, recovering from cervical cancer and figuring out how to pay bills. Jess introduced us to the mantra "I love my life" in the final episode of last season and while you don't need to hear it to enjoy this episode, it is a conversation that...
BONUS | Jess' surgery update + season 5 reflections 22.05.2024 43:49
Jess is back to give us an update on her cervical cancer surgery and recovery. We take some time to reflect on the past few months and the conversations we shared with you. Thanks for listening! We'll be back in a bit. In the meantime, binge your favorite episodes and TELL YOUR FRIENDS! Follow us @verygoodenoughpod for updates during the break! Join Very Good Mothers Club...
I Love My Life | How to stop waiting and start loving your life now 07.05.2024 40:22
In this episode, Jess and Layne face one burning question: how can you truly love your life RIIGHT NOW? We discuss the trap of waiting for our circumstances to change before we can live a life we love and our tendency to overlook our wins, constantly moving the goalposts, missing the opportunity to celebrate our accomplishments. From recognizing the dreams you've already achieved (like becomin...
Be Direct | Cut through the parenting buzzwords and connect with your toddler 29.04.2024 43:18
In this episode, we dive into the importance of being direct and clear when communicating with your toddler. Say goodbye to the endless search for the "right" parenting language or trying to follow every expert's advice. We discuss why using straightforward language and saying what you mean can strengthen your connection with your child, build trust, and reduce frustration for both o...
BONUS | Overly available mom 26.04.2024 18:52
This week's listener question: “As a child I definitely didn’t have some of my emotional needs met, and was shamed for my distress about this. A lot of this centered about me wanting to be with my mum while she was unavailable (through choice not necessity). So now I try to be really available to my children. My oldest found it super hard to give me any kind of space, and my second is currentl...
Failing Forward | How to embrace failure and grow as a parent 23.04.2024 48:19
Are you afraid of failing as a parent? Jess and Layne get real about their deep fears of public failure and share wisdom on why failing fast is a gift. We explore how being willing to fail is essential for building the lives we want, and why falling is a non-negotiable part of learning. Jess shares how feelings of failure during postpartum led her to create YouTube videos documenting her journey,...
Less-Gentle Parenting | How to be the calm leader your toddler craves 16.04.2024 41:52
This week Layne and Jess discuss the trend of gentle parenting content on social media that might be missing the mark. Is it sometimes just permissive parenting in disguise? We explore why strong leadership and clear boundaries are crucial for raising happy and secure children. We get into why toddlers might secretly be RELIEVED when you tell them "no", and how setting limits with love a...
BONUS | Pooping at preschool 12.04.2024 9:47
This week's listener question: Random preschool question for you - what happens when kids poop at school? Do the teachers help wipe their booties? Or do they have to do it themselves? 😂 Sorry if this is TMI but my son is 3 and I want to send him to preschool next year but don't see him being able to handle that on his own yet. Email your questions to verygoodenoughpod@gmail.com Book a 1:1...
Body Image Revisited | How to live FULLY in whatever body you have 09.04.2024 47:12
In this authentic (and kind of messy conversation), Jess and Layne revisit our exploration of body image. We ask questions like, "What does it truly mean to be sexy?" and, "How can women cultivate genuine confidence?" Jess shares a profound realization from experiencing cancer: how precious it is to be alive in a body, irrespective of its shape or size. We challenge our own mis...
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