Upbuilding The Self

Most of us keep death at arm's length. We might discuss it in a casual way or we might even joke about it, but how many of us are really introspective about death and all of the implications that come with it? In this episode, Michael, Rasanath and Hari Prasada delve into the importance of contemplating death in order to have a good life. They examine how death can help us reevaluate how we s...

Relationships often operate on unspoken assumptions and implicit agreements. And this is one of the reasons our relationships are so dysfunctional. In this episode, Mary, Michael, and Vipin introduce the skill of “Creating Conscious Relationship” to help you turn the implicit into the explicit, and in the process, to increase the trust in your relationships. They share the key components of this s...

Conversations can be triggering. How we deal with those triggers determines everything about how effective and meaningful those conversations (and by extension, our relationships) end up being. In this episode, Michael, Rasanath, and Vipin explore the tool of “Pinch Moments” as a way to be able to recognize, call out, and address conversations that trigger us… without triggering ourselves. Links E...

Are you growing or are you contracting? In this episode, Vipin and Michael introduce the framework of the comfort, stretch, and panic zones. They discuss what differentiates each zone from the others and how having awareness of these zones can help us grow towards the best version of ourselves. They share how they have used this framework on themselves and with their coaching clients, why most peo...

Don’t ask: Do you have faith? Ask: Where do you put your faith? In this episode, Hari Prasada, Rasanath, and Vipin discuss how faith is foundational to our daily lives and the intrinsic relationship between faith, knowledge, and experience. They analyze why faith is often associated with “blind faith,” how faith is not just a religious construct, and the role of faith in science. And finally, they...

Atomic Habits has become one of the bibles of habit formation. One of the key ideas from that book is how to use an identity (e.g., I’m a runner) to positively influence our habits (i.e., to run consistently). However, at Upbuild, we talk a lot about how identities get in the way of being our best selves. In this episode, Michael, Hari Prasada, and Vipin explore how to reconcile these two ideas. W...

Feedback. We want it and we don’t want it.  In this episode, Michael, Vipin and Rasanath dive deep into the power of the 360 Degree Review. They demystify how the 360 process works, share real life examples from their work with individuals and organizations, and unpack many of the tips and landmines that are beneficial to be aware of when giving and receiving feedback. As Rasanath shares in the ep...

In the fourth and final episode of the Nonviolent Communication miniseries, Michael, Hari Prasada, and Rasanath explore why the NVC framework will only take us so far. They discuss how our needs are never really satisfied, our yearning for eternity, the common way that people misuse gratitude as a practice, the need for spiritual practice, and steps we can take to help us on the path toward meetin...

In the third episode of our Nonviolent Communication miniseries, Michael, Hari Prasada, and Rasanath take us through a central teaching of the framework: O-F-N-R. This teaching allows us to separate facts from interpretation, identify our emotions, determine the “why” behind our emotion, and then healthily enroll others in helping us meet our needs. Links Enneagram Library Live :  Join our bi-week...

In the second episode of our Nonviolent Communication miniseries, Michael, Hari Prasada and Rasanath take a deep dive into the incredibly tight connection between needs and feelings, exploring how the nuances of these terms affect our conversations and interactions. They reveal how our needs are connected to feelings, how many of us mistakenly use the word “feeling,” and the importance of seeking...

Welcome to the first episode of our Nonviolent Communication miniseries. Nonviolent Communication (NVC) is a method of communication developed by psychologist Marshall Rosenberg in the 1960s. Its power lies in facilitating compassionate, empathetic, and effective communication between individuals. In the first episode of this miniseries, Michael, Hari Prasada, and Rasanath explore how our everyday...

Promotions. Travel experiences. Schools for our kids. Cars. Food. Other people. Our lives are full of lust. And this lust is preventing us from being who we really are. Starting with this powerful realization and from the ideas present in the Bhagavad-Gita , Hari Prasada, Rasanath, and Michael help us peel back the layers of our desires. They guide us through the maze of our selfish tendencies and...

“When you squeeze an orange, you'll always get orange juice to come out. What comes out is what's inside.” It was hearing this quote, by Wayne Dyer, that inspired Rasanath to really look at and feel confronted by a distastefully sarcastic comment that he had made toward someone he loves. In this episode, Rasanath and Vipin do a deep dive into the concept of tolerance, shedding light on t...

Why do we gossip and what is the impact of gossip on us and the people around us? In this episode, Vipin, Michael, and Hari Prasada examine why the topic of gossip is applicable to all of us, what we “achieve” when we engage in gossip, and the subtle and not-so-subtle costs that we pay when we do it. They give us actionable next steps to help us understand what is going on inside us when we gossip...

What happens when we take shortcuts in life? Does this lead us toward more efficiency and success, or does it ultimately lead us down a path of self-deception and erosion of character? In this episode, the entire team gets together to analyze the profound implications of cutting corners. While sharing personal anecdotes and also unpacking some of the world’s most “successful” corner-cutters, they...

In this very personal episode, Hari interviews Michael about a piece he wrote, From "It Happened TO Me to "It Happened FOR Me” , in which he discusses a challenging experience where he was cut off from someone he cares about. They discuss navigating the impulse to blame others, the value of being aware of the stories that we tell ourselves about ourselves, the link between gratitude and...

In this final episode of the Enneagram Foundations series, we explore how to use the Enneagram in our everyday lives in order to make sure that it has the profound impact on us that it is capable of having. We also discuss how the Enneagram can only take us so far and how a spiritual practice is needed to help us go beyond the limits of our personality.   Links Enneagram Library Live :  Join our b...

Typing is one of the most critical aspects of the Enneagram, and yet, mistyping is rampant. In this episode, we explain why this is case and what we can do about it. We also explore the one Type that is more likely to mistype than any other Type, and give you a Type by Type run through of how each Type approaches the Enneagram. What we find is that how we approach the Enneagram is often very revea...

Enneagram Type 9s, nicknamed The Peace-Seeker, pride themselves in being calm, easygoing,  and unassuming people who can flow with whatever comes and don’t need recognition or attention. They often don’t admit to themselves their problems or work to resolve conflicts because that’s really difficult and makes them feel not peaceful. Famous examples include Rosa Parks, Grace Kelly, and Jack Johnson....

Enneagram Type 8s, nicknamed The Challenger, are all about strength and showing who’s in charge to reassure themselves that they don’t have a weak bone in their body. They often can’t admit to themselves how scared they really are of their buried weakness, and so they show up larger than life in nearly all situations hoping to leverage their power for the people they love. Famous examples include...

Enneagram Type 7s, nicknamed The Enthusiast, are care-free and fun-loving with a moment-to-moment appetite for adventure and zero tolerance for boredom. They often run from their problems in life which pursue them relentlessly in spite of their intelligence and joyfulness. Famous examples include Robin Williams, the Dalai Lama, Amy Winehouse, and Russell Brand. In this episode, we explore the esse...

Enneagram Type 6s, nicknamed The Loyalist, live in a zone of constant questioning as they strive to be dependable for those they care about. They often wish that they had a cause to dedicate their life to which they could completely trust and that they had the support of others whom they could completely trust. Famous examples include Woody Allen, Adolf Hitler, Jason Alexander, and Larry David.  I...

Enneagram Type 5s, nicknamed The Investigator, are exceptionally cerebral, technical, and keep to themselves in their pursuit of knowledge to understand how things work. They often have trouble relating to people. Famous examples include Albert Einstein, Bill Gates, Eckhart Tolle, Tim Burton, and JRR Tolkein. In this episode, we explore the essence of the Type 5 and the insecurities and motivation...

Enneagram Type 4s, nicknamed The Individualist, try to be authentic with every fiber of their being, but it’s so hard for them to know who they really are deep down. They often feel overwhelmed trying to do justice to their talents, all the while feeling misunderstood by people who move too fast, are too shallow, and act too harshly to understand their full heart. Famous examples include Bob Dylan...

Enneagram Type 3s, nicknamed The Achiever, are smooth and success-driven, endeavoring to show with their life  that the sky’s the limit for what can be accomplished. They are also often concerned that others can see through their image. Famous examples include Elon Musk, Oprah Winfrey, Michael Jordan, Barack Obama, Taylor Swift, and Lady Gaga.  In this episode, we explore the essence of the Type 3...