Unlocking Leadership Through Authentic Communication

How many times have you raised your voice and been perceived as confident? Probably never. Confident people normally don’t blow a gasket when they’re trying to be heard. In this episode I explore the real reason we get aggressive during conversations and share an alternative way of getting your message across that works every time.

Do you want to hold more authority and have a greater sense of presence during meetings? Say less. I know it’s counter-intuitive but it really makes a big difference. Here we talk about the presence of people who dominate the room with constant contributions versus the presence of people who dominate with a succinct and well thought out opinion.

The more you speak the less credible you may become. If you find yourself working hard to make your point, you’ve likely lost your audience. In this episode, we explore where over-explaining comes from, how you can recognize it and what you can do to establish presence when fear of scrutiny attempts to take the driver’s seat.

Trust me when I tell you that your authentic communication is always going to feel better than who you pretend to be to feel safe. Not only is it going to feel better, but people will be more likely to gravitate towards you than want nothing to do with you. Communication likely feels hard because you aren’t being yourself. You’re essentially out of alignment with who you are and how you express wh...

Simply put, control feels hard. Clarity feels remarkably easy. In this episode, I show you how to spot when someone might be acting out of control rather than clarity. We discuss the cost of leveraging control versus clarity. And we discuss the two things you can do when communicating with others to ensure you’re not controlling but are clear.

Calling all quiet leaders! Calling all quiet leaders! You may have more executive presence than you thought. As it turns out, confidence is rooted in steadiness, not volume. So if anyone ever taught you that you’re too quiet to lead, maybe that person has it all wrong. In this episode, we debunk some common beliefs and I show you a little trick I learned from Daniel Pink on how to know who the rea...

I LOVE a good outline…especially if I’m going to be in a high stakes situation. When I wasn’t as established in my communication journey, I lived by them. Like…literally read off the script. That approach lead to distrust because people thought I was just checking a box and getting through important conversations. I never really felt comfortable with the script so I looked at the paper more than I...

We were all taught how to communicate by the experiences we went through the moment we were born. In this episode, I explore how these innate learnings show up in present day leadership and why most of us need to work to make some changes in how you lead. If you freeze when you’re challenged, replay conversations in your head or avoid feedback discussions, this episode is for you. Listening won’t...

Your team is looking for leadership. When you’re so nice you confuse your audience, your team doesn’t take you seriously and you don’t get results…you need to make some changes. In this episode, I give you a formula that I use when giving feedback that allows you to be direct, create trust, strengthen relationships and meet your goals.

If you shrink when you should be respectfully challenging someone or bite your tongue when something makes you upset, you aren’t necessarily being professional. You very well could be taking valid emotions and shoving them way down so you can keep the peace…and your job. Here, we explore some sentiments I grew up with that you likely did too and how you can express how you feel without compromisin...

Have you ever noticed how “us” versus “them” investigations feel? It’s taken me many years to realize this but I don’t think it has to be that way. In fact, I would go so far to say that we might be setting employees up to fail just because they fear the consequence of being honest more than the chance their leader may support them, develop them and may make sweeping changes as a result of their h...

Communication has a cost. You pay for it if you speak up and you pay for it if you don’t. But the cost is always different. And sometimes, it’s hard to tell which will cost you more. Here we explore the cost of silence versus the cost of honesty, discuss how avoidance masquerades as silence and evaluate who we’re really protecting by not speaking up. Spoiler alert…we aren’t protecting someone else...

I used to get so worked up when someone would message or call me about being unhappy with something I was a part of. Now, I handle things differently. In fact, when I even think someone might be unhappy, I seek them out. In this episode, I reverse engineer complaining like a pro and help you take and respond to complaints like a pro. The things I share help to cut down your anxiety, create trust w...

I grappled with this episode title because quite honestly, I hate complainers. But really, what I’m teaching is how to complain but be respectful, professional and move toward change. I help you with mindset and to construct the best “complaint” session so that you create a win not only with the situation but with the people you are collaborating with. And my favorite part is that you’ll do it whi...

If you haven’t watched Zootopia, you probably won’t understand this reference. The point of this podcast is to stop feeling like a failure when you can’t solve a problem because the information you get is poor. Stop letting these problems consume your day and your thoughts. The harsh reality is that the story you tell yourself or that you let others tell you, is getting in your way…and it’s a stra...

Have you ever worked with someone…or even better for someone who never seems to become ruffled in the face of crisis? Ever wonder how they become this way? I can’t exactly tell you the “how” but I do share a theory, a book and some examples of the rewards of operating as an “unbothered leader”. And guess what? It’s easier than you might think if you adopt a specific mindset.

Have you ever considered the biggest barrier to a performance conversation might be you? If you show up nervous and can’t get past that, guess what? Communication will be compromised. If you show up with unrealistic expectations or show up like the “boss”...there will be disastrous results. Here, I show you how to tell if you’re shooting yourself in the foot before you even sit down. Then, I help...

We have all been in situations where people want an answer from us NOW or they interact with us in a way causes us to become nervous, uncertain about our expertise or we may become angry or upset. In this episode, I tell you the key components I use to make decisions that are thoughtful, thorough and mindful. I call these “high value decisions” because my simple thought process about the value I b...

Do you want to help address poor behavior AND help your team members grow? This approach is not for the weak. It’s uncomfortable. It’s genuine. And it works. In this episode, I give you the basic steps to help shape behavior on your team so your team handles how they want to be treated without needing your assistance.

If you go into a conversation with someone thinking it’s going to be confrontational, you’ve already lost the mindset game. Even though you’re a leader, you’re still a partner with your team. The moment you have a conversation that is anything less than acting like a partner, nothing will get better. In fact, you’ll probably get further from your goal, or at the very least it will take you longer...

With good intentions, many leaders are so concerned about getting buy-in from the employee they are giving feedback to, that the conversation ends without discussing the real work to be done. Yes…we want the employee to understand there is a performance concern. BUT…that’s not the point of the meeting. The point of the meeting is to work together to solve the concern. In this episode, I show you h...

Sometimes people put us in crappy positions. They don’t mean to but more likely than not, they’re afraid of making a decision and then saddle you with it. Is it fair? No. Does it happen? More than we realize. Does it have to cause emotional turmoil? No. Not if you follow these simple six steps. You can preserve a relationship, solve a problem and uphold all your standards at the same time.

Have you ever wondered how some people who are still pleasant to be around are respected all the time? They create standards throughout each area of their life. I’m going to give you some examples of standards/boundaries/expectations in some areas of my life and even share with you the foundation of standards I require in all my relationships. It comes in handy because once you figure out what you...

What do you do when two employees have a falling out and you don’t want to lose the talent? Hopefully you’re comfortable with conflict because in this episode, I’m going to show you how I recommend leaders steer employees who are allergic to conflict through situations where they actually have to talk with each other and resolve their differences.

In this episode, I give you the scariest piece of advice that I give to every leader I coach. This piece of advice allows you to help those on your team and those you partner with to be the most successful. When you do this well you also develop great relationships with those you practice it with. And finally, there is a sense of total freedom to you as a leader. Here, I give you an example of how...