Unlearned

Consent is mandatory and well all know that, but it runs a lot deeper than just saying “yes” before the act. In a world filled with fluidity and kinks, navigating consent, especially with someone who has been traumatized can be incredibly tricky. Join Jaime and CA as they explore what consent means, what it looks like in practice, and how to have healthy conversations regarding it. *WARNING: This...

Learning our triggers is a huge part of the healing process, but knowing them and moving beyond them are two very different things. How do we break away from them? What do we do when we trigger someone else? How should they react? CA and Jaime take a deep-dive into these questions and more as they explore triggers, where they come from, and how to handle them. *WARNING: The opening roleplay contai...

Have you ever been told that you are too needy? Are you? Maybe it’s not that simple. Jaime and CA explore what people really mean when they claim that we are too sensitive, where their response and our “neediness” comes from, and what we can do about it. Notes: A sensory experience Am I too sensitive? Debunking the concept of being “oversensitive” How social and cultural factors normalize how we s...

We know that we need to learn certain skills to move beyond our traumas to live more fully authentic lives, but we also know that we can’t call a timeout on our lives as we learn those skills. Join CA and Jaime as they explore how to learn those skills and adapt to ever-changing situations. Notes: A big announcement! How to build and apply trauma skills while still living your life Why waiting unt...

Have you ever felt like you got deep with someone who refused to match that depth and wondered if they could? In this episode, Jaime and CA explore the concept of showing up fake to our relationships by discussing why some people seem unwilling or maybe even unable to show their authentic selves and then, what we should do about it. Notes: What happens when we struggle to tap into depth within our...

We have the right to a little bit of privacy in our relationships, but do we have the right to secrecy? What’s the difference? Join CA and Jaime as they explore how secrecy and privacy affect relationships through a thoughtful discussion full of various scenarios. Notes: Privacy or Secrecy - an example Hallmarks of secrecy What is secrecy? How to have the conversation around privacy When privacy t...

There is a lot of discussion about trauma on social media nowadays, but what is it? Are there different kinds? Can one type of trauma hurt more than another? In this episode, Jaime and CA explore the different types of trauma, how to identify and recognize it, as well as how to process it. Notes: End Scene Learning how to recognize and then name traumas Why recognizing complex trauma is so difficu...

Our trauma can create certain narratives in our brains. What happens when we encounter similar, but not identical situations in relationships that have nothing to do with that trauma? CA and Jaime explore why we need to create new narratives based on current events, not our past, and exactly how to do so. Notes: How the brain builds narratives How the brain interferes with current or new relations...

We hear a lot about boundaries, but what are they and how do we put them into practice? What happens when someone pushes them? Join Jaime and CA for an in-depth exploration of both ultimatums and boundaries by not only explaining, but with their signature style of roleplaying, as well. Notes: What are boundaries? What are ultimatums? How boundaries create safety How to set boundaries while respect...

You will make some changes during your healing journey. What happens when your loved ones question these changes? What if they don’t agree with them? CA and Jaime explore how to have these conversations without falling into the trap of justifying our healed selves with an in-depth exploration and a bit of roleplay. Notes: Justification versus clarification during dialogs about our recovery Why con...

So you’re on your way to recovery. What about the people who only recognize the old you? What about those moments of panic where you feel yourself slipping back into the person you once were? Jaime and CA explore how we can hold ourselves hostage during the recovery process as well as how to negotiate our way out of the situation. Notes: Why looking back at who you used to be is so difficult Why i...

If someone does something that hurts you but they didn't mean to hurt you are they at fault? What if they know those actions hurt you? What if they don't agree? CA and Jaime explore these questions and more as they discuss people's intentions vs the impact of their actions. Notes: An example of intention vs impact The importance of communication about expectations The difference betwee...

On the first episode of 2023 CA and Jaime start 2023 with an in-depth exploration of why New Year’s Resolutions hardly ever seem to work out. They discuss the differences between internal and external resolutions, healthy and not-so-healthy ones, wantingness and willingness, burnout, and more. Notes: We’re back! Sharing this year’s vision for the podcast New Year - New Resolutions Where do New Yea...

We did it! Jaime and CA jump on the mic for one final episode of the podcast for 2022. Join them as they take a look back at their first year of podcasting, explore some of the themes of the previous episodes, and look forward to 2023 and beyond. Notes: We did it! 2022 Spotify Wrapped Favorite Episodes Jaime and CA’s Favorite Clips Links: Follow the podcast on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/...

In this freewheeling, personal, and at times hilarious episode, Jaime and CA sit down for a game of “We're Not Really Strangers” a purpose driven card game and movement all about empowering meaningful connections during their last official podcast of 2022. Notes: What fast food restaurant do you think I'm most likely to drive through and what's my order? What subject do you think I thr...

Gratitude seems simple, but what about when societal expectations make us feel like we are forced to bypass our feelings to show it? CA and Jaime discuss how gratitude can be used as a weapon, how societal pressures of showing it affects those who are neurodivergent, the importance of authentic gratitude, and more. Notes: The origins of gratitude How the way we are taught gratitude affects how we...

Jaime and CA close their series on Religious Trauma by speaking with Rev Karla, an ordained, interfaith, interspiritual minister who helps people who are deconstructing from Christianity to reclaim their spirituality so they can live with authenticity free from the dogma of their religious heritage, about the difficulty of separating from the fear-based, strongly patriarchal, indoctrination of mod...

CA and Jaime continue their series on Religious Trauma by discussing the skills needed to start deconstruction by exploring their individual paths to freedom. *This episode and the series on religious trauma as a whole may be especially triggering to certain listeners.* Part 1: Ep. 27: Religious Trauma: Part 1 ⁠ ⁠Part 2: Ep. 28: Religious Trauma: Part 2 “The Sin of Thinking”⁠ ⁠Part 3: Ep. 29: Reli...

Why is Trunk-or-Treating ok while Trick-or-Treating is bad? What’s the difference between yoga and mindful movement? Jaime and CA continue their series on religious trauma by diving into the cross-section of joy, pleasure, and religion by asking why some things are ok while some things are not. *This episode and the series on religious trauma as a whole may be especially triggering to certain list...

CA and Jaime continue their series on religious trauma by digging into how the black-and-white “Hell Narrative” can be incredibly dangerous to our relationships and psyche. *This episode and the series on religious trauma as a whole may be especially triggering to certain listeners.* Part 1: Ep. 27: Religious Trauma: Part 1 Part 2: Ep. 28: Religious Trauma: Part 2 “The Sin of Thinking” Notes: The...

Jaime and CA continue their series on religious trauma by exploring how religion’s attempts to control our thoughts and emotions affect us both now and in the future. *This episode and the series on religious trauma as a whole may be especially triggering to certain listeners.* Part 1: Ep. 27: Religious Trauma: Part 1 Notes: Recapping part 1 How repressing “sinful” thoughts and emotions damages yo...

CA and Jaime introduce us to a series of episodes based on religious trauma. In this episode, they define religious trauma and explore where it comes from and how it happens. *This episode and the series on religious trauma as a whole may be especially triggering to certain listeners.* Notes: Defining trauma Defining complex trauma Defining religious trauma Why religious trauma is so harmful Why r...

Some relationships stay on the surface level and that’s ok, but sometimes we want to experience deeper intimacy with specific people. Jaime and CA explore what happens when we seek out more authentic relationships, what to expect, how to handle the emotional changes, and more. Notes: Seeking out deeper and more authentic relationships What happens when we seek deeper relationships with people who...

Truth is not always black and white and as we grow and learn (or unlearn) our definition of it changes. At some point, we may be ready to step and tell our truth, but what happens if the people we are speaking to aren’t ready or willing to hear it? Join CA and Jaime as they discuss the challenge of not only living our authentic lives but sharing that authenticity with others. Notes: Why living aut...

Control can take many forms in relationships. One of those is by putting up boundaries and saying, “no” as an attempt to control, often without even realizing it. In this episode, Jaime and CA explore the role of control in relationships, where it comes from, and what we can to do break the cycle. Notes: Where do we learn to love? How love can be controlling How do we approach shifting dynamics in...