Unfeigned Christianity

Bob Kulp hid pornography, and eventually paid sex, through most of three decades of marriage. He thought marriage would fix his lust. He thought confessing would heal it. Both were wrong. In this honest conversation, Bob walks us through the long road toward wholeness: white-knuckling that never held, the night his wife Laura put divorce on the table, the counselor who made him feel her pain, and...

I'd written a whole book about overcoming pornography before I ever sat across from a counselor and got asked the one question that changed everything: what is that part of you actually trying to do for you? My guest is Rick Manabat, a licensed therapist and the founder of Pneuma Counseling, who has walked with me personally for nearly two years now. In this conversation we get into Internal Famil...

A small comment from my wife about picking peaches set off a soundtrack I'd carried for years. In this episode I show you exactly how I worked through it, why our old wounds resurface in new seasons, and what it looks like to take our whole selves to Jesus instead of managing the shame or numbing it. We talk about why real freedom isn't about never being tempted again, but about knowing where to g...

Confession is where healing starts — but it's not where it ends. In this episode, I dig into why so many men experience a cycle of confession, temporary freedom, and failure, and what's actually going on underneath the surface. Drawing on the Internal Family Systems (IFS) framework, I walk through the emotional architecture behind unwanted sexual behavior — the exile (childhood wound and shame), t...

Have you ever found lasting freedom from pornography — only to find it creeping back years later? You're not alone, and it doesn't mean you've failed. In this first episode of the  Free for Real  series, I open up about his own experience returning to temptation after more than a decade of genuine freedom — and what my therapist said that changed my perspective:  porn is like an old friend. This e...

(Paid review — full disclosure.) Have you ever wanted to connect more deeply with the people around you but didn't know how to get the conversation there? I review Pathos, the emotional card game, in this episode — walking through how it works, what makes it different from other conversation games, how my family actually played it (which was not exactly by the book), and one specific moment where...

I had the honor of interviewing my boss, Cliff Stoltzfoos, on what it looks like to do business while living like Jesus and what leaders actually owe the people they're responsible for. We get into: Why having authority over someone calls you to greater transparency, not less What it means to take seriously that your team members are giving you enormous amounts of themselves — their brain, their t...

Keith Smith grew up on Montford Street in Pacoima — in the San Fernando Valley — during one of the most culturally distinct decades in American history. His grandfather was a Tuskegee Airman who helped build what became the first African-American suburb in the United States. His grandmother was a Southern hospitality-giver who always cooked enough for company. His neighborhood was multigenerationa...

Karen Swallow Prior spent 21 years teaching English at Liberty University. She has a PhD in English literature, has taught at a Southern Baptist seminary, and has written extensively about evangelicalism — as an insider who both loves the movement and refuses to look away from its problems. Her book The Evangelical Imagination: How Stories, Images, and Metaphors Create a Culture in Crisis asks a q...

By now you've likely heard about what's been coming out around Bethel Church in Redding, California — Sean Bowles, the cover-up, the repentance service, Bill Johnson's public comments. Mike Winger and others have done significant work exposing the timeline and the failure of leadership. I'm not here to re-litigate all of that. I'm here to talk about the one thing I haven't heard anyone name — and...

Brian Dye grew up in one of Chicago's more impoverished neighborhoods — Puerto Rican and African-American community, a mentally ill mom, an alcoholic dad, and a grandmother who was the spiritual anchor of the whole family. What changed the trajectory of his life wasn't a conference, a program, or a church event. It was a carpenter named Paul Terry who wasn't paid to do ministry — but who kept show...

Carita Witmer has been teaching elementary school in Lancaster City, PA for 10 years. Her school serves a student body that's 50% non-white — kids from immigrant families, unchurched homes, and backgrounds very different from the predominantly white Anabaptist staff that teaches them. She didn't arrive with a polished framework for cross-cultural discipleship. She arrived with a love for kids, a d...

It’s easy to react to headlines. It’s harder to listen. In this episode, I talk with my cousin Sonya, who lives and works in Minneapolis, about the recent ICE activity and what it looks like from someone actually there. We discuss immigration enforcement, fear within immigrant communities, how local churches are responding, and how Christians can navigate these conversations without living in an e...

Some teachings sound biblical. They use Scripture. They feel familiar. They often come from trusted voices. But when you look closely… they aren’t rooted in Jesus as revealed through the Scriptures. In this episode, I walk through seven dangerous teachings quietly shaping the church right now—from Christian nationalism and Zionism to the Jezebel spirit, same-sex marriage, head coverings, racial my...

I almost quit. After a long season of health challenges, burnout, and disillusionment, I came close to walking away from writing, podcasting, and this work altogether. In this episode, I share what brought me to that edge—and what pulled me back. This episode marks a reset for Unfeigned Christianity as we begin 2026. We talk about why the church desperately needs to be theologically anchored , why...

After Rewiring Desire , one question remains: Can I really change—and can I do it alone? In this episode, Asher shares an important announcement: enrollment is now open for the Live Free Mentorship Community —a 5-month guided journey toward sexual and spiritual wholeness. This isn’t another accountability group. It’s a safe, grace-filled space to process your story, rewire old patterns, and experi...

Freedom isn’t about a flawless record. It’s about connection in the moment of pain . In Part 3, we get practical: unblending from Exile/Manager/Firefighter, using simple daily practices to calm your nervous system, and building secure attachment with God and safe people. Learn why willpower fails, how neuroplasticity helps, and how to turn relapse into relationship—so your automatic response becom...

What if porn is an emergency strategy —a frantic part of you chasing relief? In Part 2, Asher unpacks Internal Family Systems (Exile, Manager, Firefighter) alongside Romans 7 and Galatians 5 to name the war you feel inside—and to show how Jesus meets every part with safety, truth, and love. You’ll learn a simple prayer for the moment the urge hits, hear a real-life trigger story (the peach tree),...

Most men think their problem is lust. But what if it’s pain? In this opening episode of Unfeigned Christianity , Asher talks about the hidden shame beneath pornography—the exhaustion, the self-protection, and the ache for connection we rarely admit. You’ll hear: Why porn is more about pain than pleasure How our attachment wounds drive unwanted behavior Why Jesus doesn’t shame us—He meets us A simp...

We’re not called to win an empire. We’re called to make disciples. In this episode, I respond to an email about Charlie Kirk, “common sense” politics, and whether America was founded on Christian values. We unpack Jeremiah 29:7 in context , ask what actually reduces harm (from abortion to gender transitions), and confront a hard truth: politics is downstream of culture . If laws can’t change heart...

In this episode, I discuss the recent scandal involving two executives from the company Astronomer who were caught in an affair at a Coldplay concert. The conversation explores the implications of infidelity, the public's reaction on social media, and the importance of maintaining intimacy in marriage. Intimacy requires effort and sin can destroy connections between spouses. What if instead of moc...

Many people wonder why I speak out about immigration. Some ask, “Why didn’t you speak up about abortion or LGBTQ+ issues?”   Here’s the truth: I believe in legal immigration. I care deeply about obeying Jesus. And I’ve spent most of my adult life among immigrants—so this isn’t just politics to me. It’s personal.   In this video, I share: -Why undocumented doesn’t always mean “illegal” -What we’re...

As a dad of five, I've been thinking a lot about how to nurture strong mental health in my kids. In this video, I share three essential truths that children need to hear every day—truths that shape their identity, sense of belonging, and purpose. These insights come from my own journey, my studies in emotional health, and what I wish I had known earlier. If you're a parent or mentor, I hope this e...

Hello friends! It's been nearly a year since I published anything. Today, I share my personal journey through a mysterious health crisis and the challenges of seeking medical help for it. I reflect on the impact of this experience on my life, work, and relationships, which has helped me realize the importance of understanding and empathy in the face of chronic health issues. Then I look at the int...

Hey friends, I just wanted to pop in here and say "Thank you!" to all of you who've reached out and expressed that you're praying for me and my family with the health issues that have come up in the last couple of months. I'm grateful that I am feeling better. My energy is recovering and the last several weeks have been quite a bit better all around. Here's a bit of an update. Please continue to p...