Undercooked Analysis

That absolute madman Allen Chaney has David and Kaela with him to be witness to a daring stunt that is sure to freak minds. Will he survive? “this story could kill allen” (aka, “The leak from the upstairs flat”) was submitted by Julia Grane.

The line between Rorshack Rorsharn and Julia Grane blurs further as David lets Abysmii pick the two stories they will read, one from each pseudonym. And, like in the past, their horizons are broadened as they read way too much into the jank narratives, bringing the episode to a surprisingly poignant conclusion. “the skibidi man” was submitted by Rorshack Rorshan; “lift your problems” was submitted...

After paying their respects to our runners-up with some brief thoughts and analysis, David, Allen and Abysmii reveal the campy, colorful and comical 1st-place winner of our New Pulp Writing Challenge . A sincere parody of the genre’s most over-the-top material, we (re)join Cannon Washington as he stoically challenges the Uber-Kremlin’s dastardly schemes in: Justice for All! Part 17: Man Waits for...

The 2nd-place winner of the New Pulp Writing Challenge is another cosmic nightmare, but this time witnessed through the disjointed epistolary of a mad(?) professor. David, Allen and Abysmii try to put the pieces together and revel in the elegent use of ambiguity in the unknown. Story submitted by ClericofMadness. Check out The Fog Report of Queen Mary’s Dark Harbor here .

After some careful consideration, David, Allen and Abysmii begin the process of revealing and discussing the winners of our New Pulp Writing Challenge . And this 3rd-place entry is an eldritch nightmare that evokes an alien city and an exacerbated game of cat-and-mouse with the story’s namesake fiendish entity. But what does this creature want with our protagonist? And why does this story bring up...

Atomic scrambling has left Abysmii a living skeleton, so David, Kaela and Allen will have to finish their analysis of Doctor Satan’s current cruel scheme. With Ascott Keane closing in, will the diabolical villain be able to follow through with his plan? Or will the power of his mysterious ray see both of them cut down to size (pun intended)? Story by Paul Ernst, first published in Weird Tales, Oct...

Have David and Allen been hoodwinked? Is this a sign of a narrative trend? A mysterious writer submits five very short stories that bear the uncanny hallmarks of shortstory1 and Rorshack Rorshan, and leaves them scratching their heads as they try to figure out what is going on. All stories submitted by Julia Grane.

Doctor Satan brings his weird crimes to Tinseltown, much to David, Allen and Abysmii's mirth. Can it be that, despite the horror it evokes, this latest scheme to pry cash from wealthy studio moguls doesn't involve direct murder? And how much good has the birdlike Ascott Keane actually done when he has consistently failed to stop his nemesis? No bones about it, this might be the goofiest entry in t...

Phantom furniture poses a problem in this odd account from the 1920s. David, Kaela and Abysmii present another weird pulp tale of unintended comedy and unintended(?) sexual tension, all wrapped around one man’s attempt to get an anniversary gift for his wife and how it goes wrong (and on a rampage). Story by Elliot O’Donnell, published in Weird Tales , February 1928. Be sure to check out our New P...

David and Matt are in for a shock as they join Kaela, Allen and Abysmii for the explosive finale of the second Doctor Satan tale. As Ascott Keane learns the truth of his adversary’s latest scheme, prepare to be jolted by the reveal of Bostiff’s backstory, a staggering amount of innuendo, and the electric clock’s purpose becoming the dumbest plot point Paul Ernst has conceived so far. Story by Paul...

Attempting something new for this show, David, Kaela and special guest Nick Jewell gather in-person to play a storytelling game, powered by the English Eerie RPG system. Working in tandem, they craft the tale of Prof. Roderick Skeffington as he attempts to learn the haunting truth behind rumors of a beast on the moor. System by Scott Malthouse and Trollish Delver Games. Get the game here . Be sure...

The actual second story in the Doctor Satan series is unveiled as Kaela, Allen and Abysmii clue in to the newest scheme of the world’s weirdest criminal. Ascott Keane disguises himself as a tree to film people, a man’s last words have something to do with shaving, and an electric clock (or lack thereof) is somehow a giveaway for Doctor Satan’s dastardly plot. Will Keane ever get over himself enoug...

The Year of Pulp continues as David, Kaela and Abysmii take a crack at a story in the public domain from a young Ray Bradbury. We get a vision of a optimistic future that never happened, and discuss the sad lack of hopeful sci-fi these days and the fears of the time possibly channeled through the story’s lens. First published in Planet Stories, Fall 1947. Read it on Project Gutenberg here . Creati...

David and Kaela touch base with Kylie Keen of Animal Fact Files and spring a Rorshack Rorshan trap on their unsuspecting guest! But surprises await, even for those well-versed in the unique and head-scratching style of these stories, and by reading this one the hosts might have just doomed the planet Earth! Be sure to check out our New Pulp Revival Writing Challenge here !

Doctor Satan presents the Creative Horror Network’s New Pulp Writing Contest! Indulge in the tales of yesteryear with our newest creative writing challenge and try your hand at the new pulp fiction renaissance. For official contest rules, click here .

We’re dragging out the Dregs 53 years before the Great War to discuss Fallout’s transition to television (though it seems radiation has caused some glitches near the end). David, Kaela, Allen and Abysmii have a lot on their minds as they delve deep into the lore and, as longtime series fans, talk about the show’s connections to it and debate where it might go in the 2nd season. Spoilers abound, so...

Bite-sized unease from a suburban setting. David, Kaela and Abysmii hop over the white picket fence and into ClericofMadness’ garage sale, managing to scrounge up the funds for a pair of stories. Also, Craig rebels. “Cherry Red: Liberation” and Suburban Terrors” were both written by ClericofMadness.

The rip-roaring conclusion to this recent adventure sees Doctor Satan delving into the art of necromancy on top of his static electricity research, Ascott Keane stoically neglect to name his scientist friend, and David, Allen and Abysmii keep at the nonsense jokes that basically write themselves. Story by Paul Ernst, first published in Weird Tales , November 1935.

Though we accidentally begin the fourth Doctor Satan story instead of the second, it does little to throw David, Allen and Abysmii off of the tropes that have already been established. The (good) doctor seems to be targeting fancy car manufacturers, but what does this next diabolical scheme entail? Is Doctor Satan actually the real inventor of the flux capacitor? And will Ascott Keane drag his lon...

An interlude before we likely advance to more pulp wackiness, David, Kaela and Abysmii look at a sobering story inspired by a prompt - a story about loss, memory, and the dead rising from the sea. Story submitted by Unft4HumnConsumption.

The thrilling conclusion of the first Doctor Satan story finds our erstwhile hero, Ascott Keane, meeting his arch-nemesis face-to-mask. David, Kaela, Allen and Abysmii are joined by Mastt Holley this time as they explore such uncanny powers as magical trash cans, blind noclipping through the city, and T-posing to call on the power of God and anime. Story by Paul Ernst, first published in Weird Tal...

A pulp-infused saga unfolds as Abysmii shares a public domain discovery with David, Kaela and Allen. Straight form the pages of Weird Tales, the gang are introduced to the baffling crimes of the eponymous Devil-themed ne’er-do-well, and meet his arch-nemesis, the logical longboy Ascott Keane. Who will win? Who will lose? How many women will faint over the course of these stories? UCA is on the cas...

Nearly two weeks after Christmas and, timely as ever, David, Allen and Abysmii are opening their last gift from the Holiday season. If you’ve ever been unnerved by a certain plastic elf that is supposedly always watching for the big man up north, this one’s for you. Story submitted by Jay Connett.

David and Kaela finally bring things full-circle (if a bit late) to talk about the Five Nights at Freddy’s movie, while special guest Ash is there to enlighten them to the weird and extensive lore of the greater franchise. How does the film hold up for the layperson compared to the fans of the series? And how in the world has this dangerous pizza chain managed to persist so long?

Can we not go even three episodes before returning to the existential exercise that is reading a Rorshack Rorshan story? Apparently not, because David, Kaela, Abysmii and Papreeka are all together in person to read one featuring the dreaded Reality Man. Story submitted by Rorshack Rorshan.