Uncomfy: Sticking with Moments That Challenge Us

When Eliza Reid’s husband unexpectedly became president of Iceland, she found herself in a role with no instruction manual—forcing her to confront self-doubt, challenge outdated expectations, and learn how to trust her own voice. In this conversation, Eliza reflects on why being a lifelong rule follower made the job unexpectedly difficult, why she embraced secondhand clothing and spoke Icelandic d...

When ChatGPT first appeared, Christian Carmody found himself facing an uncomfortable question: If AI could do much of the work for him, why not use it? As a stressed PhD student juggling graduate school, multiple jobs, a new baby, and financial pressure, the temptation was real. But what started as a question about academic integrity became a deeper conversation about learning, intellectual charac...

Many adults assume today's young people have it easier than previous generations. Sean Murphy used to think something similar until a classroom discussion stopped him in his tracks. In this episode. Sean reflects on the uncomfortable moment that forced him to listen more closely, rethink long-held beliefs, and see a new generation through a different lens. Along the way, he shares what he learned...

After decades as a surgeon, professor, and medical expert, Dr. Anthony Goodman found himself facing an unexpected diagnosis: early Alzheimer's disease. In this conversation, Dr. Goodman and his wife, Maribeth, share what it was like to recognize the signs, receive the diagnosis, navigate treatment, and redefine life as a family. They discuss the difficult moment their daughter urged Dr. Goodman to...

Would you rekindle a friendship with someone you considered dead to you? In this episode, our guest Pete O’Dell shares the story of reconnecting with a once-inseparable friend after years of silence and resentment and why sending one uncomfortable email changed everything. Pete also shares why he does a yearly friendship assessment, why the maximum number of friends you can have is 150, and why ma...

What happens when your entire sense of worth is tied to achievement? Jane Chen spent years pushing herself to the limit: working nonstop, chasing impact, and trying to prove she was enough. From the outside, she looked wildly successful: she co-founded a company whose life-saving infant incubators would eventually help over one million babies around the world. But internally, she was exhausted, di...

Lieutenant Edmund Fisher spent nearly two decades serving with the Plaquemines Parish Sheriff’s Office near New Orleans. Then, during a late-night pursuit, a catastrophic accident changed everything. After losing his leg and facing an uncertain future, Lt. Fisher had to confront painful questions about purpose, identity, faith, and resilience. In this episode, Lt. Fisher opens up about surviving t...

“There is a way out of darkness, and I know how it works because I've been there…” Tiffany Fletcher shares her story of growing up in a home shaped by severe mental illness, fear, and silence—and the long path toward healing. As a young adult, a single conversation challenged the way she saw her past and her mother, opening the door to forgiveness, perspective, and ultimately, hope. Tiffany reflec...

What do you say to someone in crisis? Joe Tuia’ana, founder of the I Love You, Bro project, joins Uncomfy to talk about men’s mental health, connection, and what it means to show up for someone in crisis. Joe shares the story of the moment when he stopped to help a stranger on an overpass and how that experience led him to create peer support groups for men across Utah. Joe explores why so many me...

One of the requirements for new police recruits in Portland doesn’t happen in an academy classroom. It happens on a track walking a mile with a high school student. In this episode of Uncomfy, we explore “Talk a Mile,” a program bringing police officers and high school students together for a simple but powerful exercise: walking a mile side-by-side while having honest conversations. ABOUT GUESTS...

What happens when the person everyone relies on has nothing left to give? Muffy Mendoza, founder of Brown Mamas, talks about grief, burnout, and the breaking point that changed everything. After losing her father and refusing to slow down, Muffy kept pushing until the day she showed up to one of her biggest events… and no one came. What felt like betrayal turned out to be something else entirely:...

BJ Campbell, a Second Amendment advocate, and Dr. Eric Fleegler, a physician and researcher focused on preventing gun violence, were part of a year-long experiment—two dozen people with radically different views on guns meeting month after month to find common ground on policy. It sounds impossible. At first, even they thought it would fail. But something surprising happened: they were able to cre...

Have you ever left a conversation thinking, “They didn’t hear me at all”? Journalist and author Mónica Guzmán shares stories from her own life, from not fully listening to her daughter, to navigating emotional disagreements with her mom, to setting intentional conversations with people who see the world differently. She unpacks what’s really going on in our heads when we stop listening and how sma...

What would you do if you planned an event and nobody showed up? Michael Wilker knows exactly how that feels. One night, after years of organizing a monthly meetup, he sat alone at a bar waiting for people that never came. It was awkward, humbling, and it almost made him quit. But he didn’t. Instead, Michael kept showing up, and, over time, that simple decision helped grow a small gathering of six...

What if the people who seem the most “put together” are actually struggling the most? Clinical psychologist Dr. Margaret Rutherford unpacks something she calls “Perfectly Hidden Depression” — the kind of struggle that hides behind achievement, perfectionism, and a life that looks flawless from the outside. Dr. Rutherford shares how perfectionism can become emotional armor protecting us from pain,...

When someone calls 911, they’re not just asking for help, they’re handing over everything. Author and former paramedic Kevin Hazzard takes us inside his very first cardiac arrest call: a Thanksgiving dinner, a grandmother collapsing at the head of the table, and a room full of people waiting for a miracle that might not come. But the moment that stayed with him isn’t what you’d expect. ABOUT GUEST...

What if the goal of disagreement isn’t to win but to build a bridge to the next conversation? Harvard Kennedy School professor Julia Minson studies one thing: how to disagree better. In this episode of Uncomfy, she shares why most of us confuse disagreement with conflict and how that mistake quietly damages our closest relationships. From ballroom dancing arguments with her husband to a life-and-d...

What do you do when you hear your child’s teacher maybe treating them unfairly — and you hate confrontation? Caitlin Kindred shares the phone call that left her shaking… and forced her into “mama bear” mode. What started as an uncomfortable school conflict led to something unexpected: her son’s ADHD diagnosis — and ultimately her own diagnosis at age 38. ABOUT GUEST Caitlin Kindred is a mom, forme...

What if one big question could change your life? Kalina Silverman became known around the world for walking up to strangers and skipping the small talk. Instead of “How’s the weather?” she asks questions like: - What are you proud of? - What’s been the darkest time of your life—and how did you get through it? - What do you want to do before you die? She calls it Big Talk, and she thinks everyone s...

What happens when someone you love doesn’t react the way you do to something that feels viscerally wrong? After the fatal shooting of Renee Good by an ICE agent in Minneapolis, Anne Marie Denman texted her mom, and what followed was a conversation that could have deepened a painful divide. Instead, it deepened their connection. CHAPTERS (0:00) Introduction (0:42) Meet Anne Marie Denman (2:05) Mom...

What if the problem isn’t disagreement — it’s how we ask the question? Shira Hoffer was a freshman at Harvard when she asked what she thought was a simple, honest question and got completely shut down. That moment launched her into studying and helping others with something all of us are wrestling with right now: how to stay curious when conversations get tense. ABOUT GUEST Shira Hoffer is the Exe...

What happens when three people with completely different identities and perspectives speak up in the same room, each saying they don’t feel safe? In this episode, Raj Vinnakota shares a powerful moment from a university auditorium where tension was thick, fear was real, and the stakes couldn’t have been higher. He unpacks what it actually takes to create spaces on campus (and in everyday life) whe...

Why being alone feels so hard—and how solitude can make you healthier, calmer and more connected. Robert Coplan spent months on the road as a solo musician, driving through the southern U.S. with long stretches of boredom, isolation, and nowhere to escape his own thoughts. Then he made one small shift that turned his misery into meaning. Coplan has since spent his career studying solitude—why we r...

What do you do when your values clash with the people you love most? Licensed clinical social worker and author Kelsey Blahnik joins Uncomfy to challenge the growing “no-contact” trend and offer a more nuanced alternative she calls The And Way—a framework for holding your convictions and staying in relationship. Kelsey Blahnik’s book, The And Way: Assertive Peacemaking in a Divided World — https:/...

Father Francis Gargani entered religious life as a teenager and has remained in the Church through seasons of change, challenge, and growth. Over the years, his ministry has taken many forms—from parish life and campus ministry to caring for people with AIDS and walking alongside LGBTQ Catholics seeking spiritual community. Throughout it all, he reflects on what has helped him stay rooted: communi...