Unbreak My Heart

It's time to plan for college and think about what's going to happen next for Tanner and his girlfriend. She was the one for him and making choices to prioritize the relationship was a no-brainer.  Those choices were sacrifices. He could've gone to a really great school for his talents and scholarships, instead he stayed local for her. Well, the worst happened. She changed her mind and moved out o...

Sometimes our first relationship leaves a near eternal impact on our day to day in the here and now. Annie's first love started out as a Dragon ball z character. This unlikely match evolved from mystery, to pen pals and eventually to love.  They had a long distance relationship between Florida and Connecticut. With the distance it took time to get to see and embrace the inherent inter-personal pro...

After living together and being put through the wringer of grad school, their original spark faded to a soft pulse of steady and stable support. They had talked about a future together; however, the repeated stress of getting through the day made the love-line of their relationship blurry. Was it the stress that made her feel self-protective or was there something about their relationship that kep...

When Curly's boyfriend wanted to move home, she followed him on a whim, but soon her wanderlust gave way to restlessness and isolation. Feeling alone in a new city she met "R". As they spent more time together, he introduced her to a culture and lifestyle called ethical non-monogamy. After sometime, Curly felt this is what she wanted. Admittedly, she knows she's the "bad guy" in this breakup. List...

She spent her childhood living through a looking glass; love was a longing that was on the other side until she met John. This relationship was a mixture of gifts and losses. As much as she loved him, he hurt her by cheating, leaving her feeling crippled. The lessons she learned while recovering from this heartache have helped her through other difficult and even near-death experiences! We have a...

Chris found a match that gave him hope he'd soon be starting a family of his own. Resilient to overcome the challenges of a long-distance relationship, they tried their best to make 'til death do us part' happen.  However, there were significant choices each of them had to make independently, faster than they could manage mentally and emotionally. The pressures of building a life together collided...

Will had a good job and a nice house. He was looking for a wife, someone to build a future and a home with. When he met Maddie, they fell fast!  She was a strong, independent woman and knew what she liked. Turns out that was a mask. Beneath the mask he found a woman who was afraid, isolating, and controlling. When he tried to have boundaries their capacity for compatibility started to wane. This s...

Charley and his girlfriend were on track to building their careers and lives together, or so he thought. He saw her as the woman he'd spend the rest of his life with. She felt he was never in love with her and broke it off.  How could she not see - she was it!? How could he not see she felt like a second priority?!  Charley and I discuss this misconception and so much more about the patterns we ge...

Kurt arrived at this interview just after his final deposition with his soon-to-be ex-wife. A second failed marriage and being a Christian single father of three is not what he imagined would be his reality. Like many people in his situation, he carries a lot of guilt and anger.  What's at the root of his anger? Is he trying to escape something ugly inside? Only one way to find out...

Merry found herself at a crossroads. She could stay the course with her husband even though he cheated. She could remain as his wife because he fought so hard to not lose her. Or, she could let go. She could end the relationship and navigate something different on her own.  This is a conversation about Merry navigating the unknown of letting go of her lifestyle, her marriage and embrace a differen...

Lindsey's story is sharp with wisdom, moments of relatability, and insight. In less than a year's time with her boyfriend, she thought they would get married.  After one fight, he said, "he wanted out". Was that just emotion or did he mean it? They stayed together, but it was rocky, eventually leaving them estranged. Lindsey found herself in a second and shorter unhealthy relationship leaving her...

Raul, found love in New York with a partner who seemed to be a dream come true. Raul invested wholeheartedly into the relationship - holding nothing back. Only one seed of doubt existed in their connection and he sensed it from the beginning. Was Anthony going to be ready? Did he still need time to explore the world as a single man? Anthony is six years younger than Raul. After two years of bliss,...

Colleen's heartache carries both sorrow and wisdom. She loved her husband with all her heart. She loved the 3 girls from his previous marriage with all her heart. So much of her story with her ex is tied to the challenges of being the unwanted step-mom of a teen. Her husband struggled with substance abuse and unfortunately, Colleen's love wasn't strong enough to overcome all the adversity that cam...

Zeke is a friend of mine, originally from Argentina. He was brave enough to be my first guest, before I really knew how the flow of the show would go.  I love this conversation with Zeke as it is full of wisdom and insight. We talk about the basics of breaking up, what happens when we try and protect others from pain and some universal ways to recover from heartache. Chocolate may be a key ingredi...

They were never an "official" couple. They met on a dating app and for Elise, there were a lot of firsts:  the first partner that was a woman, the first person that accepted her ace identity with understanding, the first woman she was genuinely sexually attracted too... Over a year went by before it was clear this wasn't going to evolve into something more. Not a bite of reality Elise wanted to di...

Young, insecure and longing for attention, Kalei falls for a boy during college orientation. It could be love at first sight, he even seems to like her back.  This is a story of a CRUSH. Both Kalei and David fall for each other but never really put themselves out there to truly come together. Instead, they dip their toe into relationship status for 2 weeks and quickly bail - only to become best fr...

Owning a business together, raising kids, and being actively involved in the community was just the beginning of the plan. Nick and his wife were a team with big dreams! Unfortunately, they would fight. Fighting led to conversations about divorce. It wasn't until he found she was unfaithful that he started to accept letting her go, letting the plan go. Nick learned a lot of lessons but the one tha...

You want to do the right thing. You want to see love grow and last a lifetime. That's what George thought he found! He found himself at home with her even when she received a terminal diagnosis.  He was devastated to find out that she had been cheating and couldn't bring himself to trust her again. Eventually, he moved on and found himself in another situation with a woman who was kind yet detache...

Sometimes we find ourselves in a relationship and something shifts. That something can be really clear - like losing a job. Or, that something could inexplicable.  Chloe's partner had one of those shifts. He changed his mind and didn't really seem to know it or at the very least communicate it well. The whole life they had built together over 6 years seemed to end in vapors. They find ways to conn...

Heather started to fall head over heels for this new guy. He made her feel like she was the center of the universe and she loved it, until it became intense and painful.  His behavior was manipulative and confusing. Even though she got out, she hasn't been able to shake what happened. Together, Heather and I go off the grid and unpack what happened in another dimension. It's uncomfortable, edgy an...

Alyssa and her boyfriend got pregnant young and their family insisted they get married. Against their better judgment, they agreed to follow through with this commitment.  Alyssa found herself struggling as her partner was not very supportive or present. She struggled as keeping up with being a Mom, going to school, work, and being a wife.  When she no longer felt safe, she let go of the relations...

When you want to make love work, when you want the relationship to win over all of the setbacks but it just doesn't... This is what Kal and his girlfriend experienced. Through multiple breakups, they tried so hard. They knew they loved one another. Yet, no matter what they tried, nothing got better. Eventually, they couldn't endure the hurt caused by one another and they were forced to let go for...

She said yes to marrying him but she didn't mean it. As John's wife, she started acting as if their marriage wasn't real. After some time, John got their marriage annulled.  After successfully going through a few years of recovery John learned, from experience, that he couldn't fix or rescue his wife. Letting her go wasn't easy nor was the alternative of living with someone who wasn't honest. List...

Ending a relationship is an opportunity we can embrace to become a better person. Sometimes breakups are unexpected, or they end a bad situation. Either way, what if this is the ticket out of prision - a fresh start to exploring life without being stuck? Gary addresses this very topic in today's episode. Thank you for listening!

Bridget gave herself a pass in her 20's, "it's ok to party hard". She embraced a lifestyle that was wild - drugs, substance abuse and a delicate state of mental health were the norm for awhile. She met a man at a bar and their connection was electrifying and unstable. They were on and off, he was fun and attractive, and she was madly in love - the quintessential bad boy! He had an intervention to...