UnBecoming with Elena Joy

"Why doesn't Gen Z have a work ethic?!" We hear that time and time again. It turns out, Gen Z actually does have a work ethic. And they're also one of the first generations to hold a genuine capacity and ability to prioritize their mental well-being. Elena explains that by creating a system based on data, compassion, and accountability rather than blame and frustration, Alex and Brayden were able...

Free Networking Cheat Sheet: https://latitudeleaders.com/networkingcheatsheet 49 HR conferences in 2023. Elena takes everything she learned in that year and breaks it down into three ways you can show up more authentically as yourself at your next event. Three Words Away: https://latitudeleaders.com/threewordsaway Connect with Elena Joy Thurston on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/elenajoythu...

The Leadership Skill You Already Have Time to Build How to create connection at work without adding a single thing to your calendar Content Note: This episode includes a brief mention of miscarriage. Episode Summary: Connection at work is a skill, and it's one you already have time to practice. In this episode, Elena Joy breaks down why disconnection is the single biggest predictor of burnout, why...

In this episode, I break down why middle managers are the single greatest lever in your organization — for engagement, retention, and burnout prevention. Using a real story from the public school system, I share how one principal walked into a failing school (fourth leader in four years, morale in the basement) and, without additional funding or lighter workloads, transformed retention, culture, a...

Leaders in the US, let's chat about how can you show up for your people on a day like today. Links to the resources mentioned below. Somatic breathing exercise audio - https://latitudeleaders.com/grounding Burnout Prevention Starter Kit - https://latitudeleaders.com/burnoutstarterkit List of Core Values - https://latitudeleaders.com/corevalueslist Joyful Office Hours - https://calendly.com/elenajo...

🎙️ Episode Title: The Jolt That Changed Everything Episode Summary: There’s nothing more American than the solopreneur journey—it’s just you versus late-stage capitalism. (Cue the Rocky montage.) In this episode, Elena Joy shares the surprisingly emotional story of how a simple box of flyers—created by her friend and client Vera at Southwest Solutions —became a catalyst for confidence, clarity, an...

In this episode, I’ll break down: Why most burnout advice doesn’t stick (spoiler: no one else is the expert on your burnout but you). The five capacities every leader needs to protect to prevent burnout: Cognitive, Emotional, Relational, Time & Energy, and Systemic Support. How the assessment works and why it takes the shame out of talking about burnout at work. A real-world story of 50+ HR leader...

Spend Time Like It Belongs to You Not like you stole it. Once upon a time, I was called “Little Bit”—tiny in size, and eventually tiny in spirit—because I kept pouring myself into everyone else’s cup. Wife. Mother. Friend. Volunteer. Dutiful daughter. Until one day, there was nothing left of me to pour. In this episode, I’m not giving you a color-coded calendar hack. I’m giving you permission to r...

Ever feel like you’re watching your life from the outside, stuck in your head while your body goes through the motions? In this deeply personal episode, Elena Joy shares the quiet, dangerous cost of being overly useful—and how many of us vanish in plain sight. From time-obsessed spirals to the ghosts of unlived queer memories, she explores what happens when we tie our worth to productivity, invisi...

🎧 Episode Title: Dear Independent Human: Why Asking for Help Feels So Damn Hard 📝 Show Notes: If you've ever thought, “I’ll just do it myself” —this one’s for you. In today’s episode, Elena Joy pulls back the curtain on one of the biggest misunderstandings about asking for help. It’s not about pride. It’s not even about capacity. It’s about connection. And when we stop asking, we might be uninte...

This is Part 2 of my series on Relational Capacity. In Part 1, I shared a personal story about how my own disconnection nearly burned me out. If you missed it, you can read it here . Today, we’re digging into what Relational Capacity actually is, why it matters for burnout, and how to start rebuilding it. Show Notes – Resilience is OUT. Connection is IN. Burnout isn’t always about doing too much—i...

Episode Title: When Love Meant Being Saved Episode Summary: Have you ever mistaken being “rescued” for being loved? In this deeply personal episode, I share the story of how I learned to stop relating to people as someone who needed saving—and what happened when I finally showed up as my whole self. We’ll explore how our patterns of relating shape our confidence, our ability to connect, and even o...

🎙 Show Notes – When Was the Last Time You Got Radically Honest With Yourself? When was the last time you ripped the duct tape off your own mouth and said the truth you’ve been avoiding? “I hate my job.”“I don’t want this life I’ve built.”“I feel numb and lost.” This episode is about the kind of honesty that feels dangerous—the honesty we avoid because once we admit it, we fear everything will have...

🎙️ Episode Title: Emotional Constipation: A Leadership Epidemic 📝 Show Notes: What if the real reason you feel disconnected—from your team, your partner, your life —has nothing to do with your workload… and everything to do with your emotional backlog? In this episode, we’re talking about Emotional Capacity —what it is, why most of us were never taught how to build it, and how the lack of it quie...

I was 37. Married. Stay-at-home mom to four kids. But mostly, I was Mormon. The Mormon church saved me when I was 16. Or so I believed. They showed me the exact to-do list that qualified me as worthy of God’s love. They said as long as I checked off the worthiness list, God had to love me forever. Those were the rules, and having full control over whether I was loved or not sounded real good to me...

🎙️ UnBecoming with Elena Joy Episode Title: The Energy It Takes to Be Understood Subtitle: How High-Achieving Leaders Burn Out Behind the Mask Episode Summary: Welcome back to UnBecoming , where we say the things no one’s teaching you about leadership and life. In today’s episode, I’m reading the second installment of our burnout series, diving deep into Cognitive Capacity —what it is, how we burn...

In this episode, I read aloud my latest Substack piece: Stop Reading My Face. It’s about facial masking, trauma, ADHD, and the cognitive cost of constantly performing clarity for others. If you’ve ever been misunderstood because your expression didn’t match your intent, or punished for how your face looked while someone else was speaking, this one’s for you. I share how a smile in the wrong moment...

I love that Juneteenth falls during Pride Month. While I could highlight the countless humans of color who have been instrumental in both LGBTQ+ and civil rights, that’s not the best offering I can give on a day like today. Instead, let me show you how I’m finding my racism and deconstructing it. It’s the most honest contribution I can make. As a middle-aged white queer woman whose internalized bi...

Burnout in 2025 hits different. The workload is heavy, sure. But that’s not what’s breaking us. It’s the fact that every conversation feels like a transaction. Every meeting can feel like a pitch. Every interaction is another moment to brace yourself, smile politely, and perform. It’s giving relational poverty and it sucks. For HR and Procurement leaders especially, vendor meetings can feel like o...

TLDR: Burnout prevention at the executive level isn’t about time management. It’s about noticing the masks you’re wearing—and finding real ways to take them off. Sustainable leadership lasts because it’s built on something real. And as CEO coach and HR lawyer, Terry Flores says: “Leadership should be about helping people. If you don’t have a desire to help, what are you doing?” A Tale of Two Leade...

Let’s be honest. In 2025, allyship burnout doesn’t feel like a slow simmer. It actually feels like a moral reckoning. Will it explode or implode? In this special edition of Joyful Office Hours , I named what most leaders are too tired to articulate: the unique depletion that comes from advocating for inclusion while navigating systemic backlash. From DEI bans to personal identity threats, many lea...

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