Unbecoming Me with Toi

In episode eight of  The Unbecoming Me with Toi , host Toi introduces "Detachment Season," exploring why boundaries stop feeling mean. She discusses breaking cycles of over-giving, over-functioning, and emotional overextension in relationships. Toi emphasizes matching energy rather than over-functioning, using boundaries as tools for self-protection and data collection about who truly respects you...

In this episode of Unbecoming Me, Toi explores one of the biggest relationship traps: confusing chemistry with character. She explains how attraction, butterflies, and the excitement of a new relationship can distract us from seeing someone's true intentions and patterns. Through personal insight, Toi unpacks the dangers of breadcrumbing, inconsistency, and falling in love with someone's potential...

In this episode of  Unbecoming Me , host Toi shares her personal journey of recognizing and breaking free from the cycle of overgiving. She reflects on how constantly pouring love, energy, and financial support into others left her emotionally and physically depleted. Toi describes performing love without receiving it in return, tolerating disrespect, and losing herself in the process. Through hon...

In this heartfelt episode, host Toi reflects on the profound transformation motherhood brought into her life. She shares how becoming a mother in 2017 forced her to release bad habits like people-pleasing and codependency while embracing selflessness and unconditional love. Toi also opens up about grieving her grandmother's passing and finding comfort in believing she sent her son to her. Now, as...

In Episode 4 of  Unbecoming Me , host Toi delivers a heartfelt monologue about unbecoming the version of herself that settled for less than she deserved. She reflects on years of overgiving, weak boundaries, and tolerating disrespect in both friendships and relationships. Sharing personal experiences of being mistreated despite her generosity, Toi emphasizes the importance of recognizing self-wort...

In Episode 3 of  Unbecoming Me , host Toi explores the concept of "Shedding Season" — a transformative period of personal growth where letting go becomes essential. She discusses how life's shifting phases often lead to changes in friendships, forcing deep self-reflection and spiritual awakening. Like a snake shedding its skin, this process involves releasing old identities, habits, and relationsh...

In this episode of  Unbecoming Me with Toi , host Toi shares personal do's and don'ts she's learned through her journey of self-discovery. She reflects on lessons around relationships and boundaries, including never chasing people, not placing others above yourself, and recognizing the difference between wanting and needing someone. Toi emphasizes knowing your worth, embracing low-maintenance frie...

In this episode of "Unbecoming Me," host Toi returns after a brief hiatus, candidly sharing her recent struggles with grief, illness, and life's busyness. She emphasizes the importance of allowing oneself to pause, heal, and unlearn societal pressures to always be "okay." Toi encourages listeners to embrace their unique journeys, highlighting her own story of patience and growth through career cha...

In the season finale of "Unbecoming Me," host Toi invites listeners to reflect on their true selves as they enter 2026. Exploring identity through the company we keep, our shadow sides, and authentic character, Toi encourages embracing every part of oneself—good, bad, and ugly. She revisits themes of healing, self-love, and growth, reminding listeners that it's okay to let go of relationships and...

In this episode of "Unbecoming Me," host Toi explores the theme of "unbecoming"—letting go of societal expectations, old identities, and limiting beliefs to embrace authenticity. Drawing inspiration from Brené Brown's "The Gifts of Imperfection," Toi shares personal reflections on growth, healing, and self-acceptance. She discusses grieving losses in relationships and friendships with gratitude fo...

In this episode of "Unbecoming Me," host Toi shares her personal journey of healing and self-discovery, setting the stage for a podcast focused on growth. Centering on the theme "Love Yourself," Toi discusses the importance of self-love as an active, daily practice. She offers practical tips—like affirmations and self-reflection—and encourages listeners to value themselves, set healthy boundaries,...

In this episode of "Unbecoming Me," host Toi shares her personal journey through a stressful season, highlighting the transformative power of breathwork. She discusses how intentional breathing helped her manage overwhelming responsibilities, find calm, and foster healing. Toi encourages listeners to pause and breathe, even briefly, as a way to regain control and hope during difficult times. The e...

In this episode of "Unbecoming Me," host Toi explores the healing modalities of hypnosis and journaling. She shares personal experiences with hypnosis, emphasizing its power to access the subconscious, foster self-awareness, and support overcoming challenges like imposter syndrome. Toi highlights journaling as a vital companion to hypnosis, helping process insights and emotions. She encourages lis...

In this episode of "Unbecoming Me," host Toi shares her personal journey of healing and growth, exploring the concept of "unbecoming" to become your true self. She discusses healthy healing practices, including hypnosis, journaling, breathwork, reiki, and traditional therapy, sharing her own experiences and insights. Toi emphasizes the importance of embracing diverse healing modalities, letting go...

In episode 4 of "Unbecoming Me," host Toi explores the importance of self-care and self-evaluation, emphasizing that self-care looks different for everyone. She discusses practices like spa visits, exercise, journaling, and inner child and shadow work as vital for healing. Toi encourages listeners to prioritize their well-being, embrace change, and regularly engage in self-care activities. She rem...

In this third episode of "Unbecoming Me," host Toi explores "The Lonely Season," a period of solitude that often follows outgrowing relationships, friendships, or life situations. Toi shares personal stories of navigating loneliness during major life transitions and emphasizes how this challenging time is essential for self-discovery, healing, and growth. She encourages listeners to embrace the di...

In this throwback episode of "Unbecoming Me," host Toi reflects on her introduction to podcasting over five years ago. She shares a deeply personal story about considering a podcast centered on a difficult, controlling relationship with someone who was incarcerated. Toi discusses how that painful chapter became a catalyst for her healing and growth, ultimately shaping the podcast's mission. She em...

In this episode of  Unbecoming Me , host Toi shares her deeply personal journey of transformation after a challenging relationship with an incarcerated partner. Reflecting on how this experience led her through loneliness, self-discovery, and healing, Toi emphasizes the importance of shedding old identities to embrace authenticity. She encourages listeners to honor their own "unbecoming" seasons,...

Welcome to Unbecoming Me with Toi! Over the past five years, Toi has journeyed through life's challenges, letting go of who she thought she had to be so she could become her true self. In this podcast, she shares insights on healing, personal growth, and shedding old layers to embrace the person you were always meant to be. Unbecoming Me is here to inspire and guide you as you begin your own journ...