Trader Hoes

The Hoes are on the road and throwing it back to the thing that got them hooked on Trader Joe's in the first place: charcuterie. This episode features olive appreciation, questionable meat nuggets and a potential cheese pinup calendar. In the cart: The Sheepish Tomato Parmesan Tapenade Antipasti Platter

Thanks to a special request from Katie’s husband, Salvador, the Hoes are diving headfirst into Trader Joe’s mush (overnight oats) and pud (pudding) offerings. Peel back the foil lid, and you’ll also find matching blood types and shirts, Evie’s overnight oats recipe, and some impeccable Vanna White impressions.  In the cart:  Vanilla Overnight Oats Strawberry Overnight Oats Peanut Butter Overnight...

The Hoes are on the road and testing out the RAVioli 4, which is either Toyota’s latest model of pasta SUV or an episode stuffed with Trader Joe’s ravioli options. In the cart: Sweet Corn, Burrata & Basil Tomato & Burrata  Goat Cheese & Carmelized Onion Chicken Sausage

The Hoes have hit the road for a little summer review retreat, and to kick things off, they're diving into a big bowl of mystery meat...balls. While they try to win the meatball lottery, sampling all three of Trader Joe's fresh chicken meatballs, they also make some truly troublesome food confessions and create an entire imaginary meat universe with a highly paid Women's Meatball Basketball Associ...

This week, the Hoes are getting a serious sugar rush from Trader Joes, including two questionable confections, a patriotic taffy and a strawberry candy so good, we’d sing about if we weren’t so afraid of getting sued. In the cart: Red White & Blue Cookie Bites Flat Taffy Root Beer Float Pieces Coconut Cashew Candy Clusters Strawberry Fields Gummy Candy

This week, the Hoes are taking a quick lunch break, but this lunch may very well break them. Katie and Evie are topping these sandwiches with some Trader No’s, the first ranking predictions, and an impassioned spit take.  In the cart:  Chicken and Cheddar Cheese Sandwich on Cranberry Seeded Wheat Bread Turkey Apple Cheddar Sandwich  Ham and Cheese Sandwich  • Spring Vegetable Tart

The Hoes are getting juiced - with Joe’s fruitiest of refreshments. We’re up to the gills in Guava and Katie is up to her in a full-body bathing suit. Not included: the drink umbrella Trader Joe loves so much.  In the cart: Passion Fruit Orange Guava 100% Juice Blend Organic Guava Nectar Juice  Sparkling Lychee Juice Beverage

We’ve got a special treat for you this week, Hoes: A peek at the exclusive episodes our Patrons get each month in our Readin’ & Eatin’ series, where we pair Trader Joe's snacks with our latest literary obsession. In this episode, we're descending into the chaotic, explosive, and high-stakes world of Dungeon Crawler Carl by Matt Dinniman. Is this essentially an absurdly violent intergalactic ga...

While the Hoes are normally pretty cheesy, this week they have reason to be extra sharp. Katie and Evie are slicing into four new(ish) new options from the cheese case, with unexpected results. In addition to the Multigrain Crackers, they’re pairing these dairy delights with pondering how Katie escaped Twilight, our new favorite alias, and the complete mystery of why Evie can’t say “paprika.”  In...

The Hoes are back on the baked goods and expectations are all over the place. From the neon shortbread to the tea time blondies, it’s a shelf-stable rollercoaster of sweet, sweet carbs. In the cart: Strawberry Brioche Style Liège Waffles Lemon Flower Cookies Earl Grey Blondie Bars

Time is a construct, so the Hoes are digging into breakfast for dinner this week. But why stop at challenging the self-inflicted limitations of time? Katie and Evie also question what can realistically (and safely) be car food, if humans really need silverware, and how long is too long in the microwave. In the cart: Breakfast Bowl  Tortilla Española  Spicy Spuds • Bubble Waffles

Trader Joe's set the trap, and we walked right into it. This week, we've reviewing those items near the checkout that just happen to make their way into your cart at the last minute. For better or worse. We also squeeze in whether clones celebrate birthdays, the possible familial relations of Betty Crocker and Betsy Ross, and a gummy bear situation that's definitely not safe for work. In the cart:...

The Hoes are hitting the snack aisle once again to try Trader Joe's much talked about ranch rolls (their name, not Joe's). While they're there, they'll also have a chance to sing about buffalo popcorn and talk new nut merch. In the cart: Ranch Flavored Rolled Corn Tortilla Chips Buffalo Ranch Popcorn Chile Lime Flavored Fried Pork Rinds Garlic Butter Nut Mix

The Hoe's are hitting up Trader Joe's frozen pasta, and that's if you use the "pasta" verrry loosely. Of course eating endless amounts of carbs isn't their only skillset – these Hoes can also name your baby, pack your suitcase and tell you where to build your next Trader Joes. In the cart: Jambalaya Spicy Farfalle Pasta with Italian Chicken Sausage Garlicky Pasta Spicy Alfredo Fusilloni Pasta

This week, the Hoes thought that they found one of TJ’s best-kept secrets in the refrigerated smoothies. But some secrets should never be told. They’re also blending in Evie’s new rap name, Katie’s fear of jacked-up babies, and the love story between bananas and nuts.  In the cart:  Organic Coconut Smoothie Banana & Almond Butter Protein Smoothie Vanilla Almond Spiced Chai Protein Smoothie Cho...

Can you believe i?, The Hoes are cooking! Ok technically, they’re just warming up frozen pizzas but the bar is extremely low these Hoes and apparently even lower for some of these Trader Joes pies. In the cart: Tarte au Brie et aux Tomates Tarte d'Alsace with Ham, Onions, and Gruyere Burrata, Prosciutto and Arugula Flatbread BBQ Chicken Pizza

This week, the Hoes are shaking this up with a few of Trader Joe's newer pre-made pasta salads. After removing the sauce packets from the tiny plastic containers, they also fit in the concept for a new crime-fighting pasta show for kids, why Katie could never commit a crime, and the Cucumber Wetness Spectrum. In the cart: Lemon Basil Pasta Salad Chickpea Kale And Crispy Red Rice Salad Peanut Udon...

It was 91 degrees in February and the Hoes are coping with some new frozen favorites from Trader Joe’s. If you love instant affagato, pistachio having its moment, super-sized macrons, and unpacking Katie’s pigeon trauma, then you’re in for a treat, Hoes. In the cart: 2 Affogatos Vanilla Non-Dairy Frozen Desserts Macaron Ice Cream Sandwiches Italian Pistachio & Fior di Latte Gelato Style Frozen...

This week, the Hoes are asking an age-old question: Is this a cake you can eat in your car? Not even childhood trauma is going to keep them from getting an answer as Katie and Evie try Trader Joe's mini sheet cakes for the first time. They're also mixing in getting cookie samples from Jeff(?), eating cake as an act of rebellion, and casting these cakes as bakers on the Great British Bake Off. In t...

The Hoes are hitting up the snack aisle and finding their new stripper names in the process. From curried potato chips to yeasty popcorn, it's a full-flavored episode that'll have you pondering deep thoughts like, "Do I look like my dog?" and "How do you pronounce 'Piquant?" In the cart: Sweet Onion Style Pretzel Twists Thai Style Yellow Curry Flavored Potato Chips Hot Honey Popcorn Piquant Popcor...

This week, the Hoes fight through some technical issues to dip into the deep end of Trader Joe's dips. Katie and Evie also scoop up garlic blindness, a severe lack of poker face, and their new pitch for an HGTV show, Dippin' and Flippin'. In the cart: Roasted Tomato Labneh Dip  Caesar Salad Dip  Garlic Spread Dip  Vegan Tzatziki Dip  Almond Chipotle Dip 

Happy Valentine’s and Galentine’s Day to all who celebrate! The Hoes are back with some sweet favorites and some new discoveries. Will they be love at first bite or taste like bitter disappointment? Did we even love pink before Victoria Secret brainwashed us? And when will Trader Joe’s start selling condoms? In the cart: Sweet Heart Bath Fizzer Italian Artisan Heart Shaped Pasta Chocolate & Pe...

This week, the Hoes are prepping for the upcoming Bad Bunny concert, surrounded by sports, with some game day faves. They're pairing these snacks with getting roasted by AI, some humbling pronunciations, and accepting their true selves as Crab Rangoon Girls. In the cart:  Chicken Uncured Bacon Ranch Dip Buffalo Blue Unexpected Cheddar Cheese Spread  Jalapeño and Cream Cheese Crispy Wontons • Mac a...

The Hoes are back with some bubbly biome boosting sodas. Will they even learn the difference pre and probiotic? Who can say! But one thing's for sure, Trader Joe's is jumping on that gut health train. They also crack into Coke's medicinal past, spitting in the ocean, and our dream sponsor, Metamucil. In the cart: Strawberry Vanilla Prebiotic Soda Cherry Cola Prebiotic Soda Ginger Lemon Probiotic S...

Rounding out the return of the Hoes, Katie and Evie share Part 3 of the items they've been dying to review over the last 3 years! Also on the table are Katie's questionable cottage cheese choices, Evie's dip obsession, and the need for Everything But The Bagel bath bombs. In the cart: Ranch Cottage Cheese Dip Unexpected Cheddar Cheese Spread Apple Chip Duo Sweet Cannoli Dip