Tiny Bites of Wagaliciousness

A million years ago I broke up with a guy. He wasn’t right for me, and even in my teenagerness, somehow I knew I deserved better. It was hard – I tried to be kind and he wasn’t receptive, so when I had said all I could say and turned to leave, he kicked me in the butt. Seriously! At the time it felt like it was about me – I must be a really terrible person if I made someone want to kick me as I wa...

Sometimes I think I’ve responded to an email or text, only to realize that I did it in my head and not in real life. Does that ever happen to you, too? We spend a lot of time thinking about things – things we have to do, things we want to do, and things we shouldn’t do. We think about how to accomplish something, about things we’d like to accomplish, and things we dream of and can’t see how we cou...

Are you in a relationship with someone who is mean to you in some way? It doesn’t have to be physical – maybe they withhold praise when you want to hear it, or maybe they change up their expectations of you and tell you it’s all your fault that you didn’t please them. Or maybe they even go so far as to tell you that you’re lucky to have them and you’ll never do better because you don’t deserve bet...

How do you feel right this very minute? If you’re not sure, take a minute to find out. Be an investigator – sneak up on your feelings and see what they are and what they’re doing to your body, your attitude and your day. Whatever you’re feeling right now equals how your life is feeling right now. Let me say that again because I really want you to grasp this – your life IS right now. It’s not ten y...

Is there an -ism that makes you angry any time it shows itself in your life? Maybe it’s sexism or racism or whatever-ism – do you feel your blood starting to boil just thinking about it? Stop. Seriously – stop thinking about it. Yes, there are people in the world who hold ridiculously flawed thought patterns and sometimes act on them. Can you change them? Can you fix them? Hint – that answer is “n...

You are a giving person. You help people when you can, you care about the world and try to do what you can to make it a better place. In your work life, you are supportive, caring and pulled in a bunch of different directions all day long. Yet still you give, and still you care. It’s wonderful to be a caring, giving person. Right up until it isn’t. Be there for those who need you, human, canine, f...

  Did someone look at you today in a way that made you feel less than – like they were looking down their nose at you? I remember a time when I couldn’t afford much of a car – I had wheels that got me where I needed to go – most of the time, anyway! That car wasn’t much to look at but it was functional and mostly dependable, and there were people who judged me by the car I drove. It didn’t fe...

Today someone hurt my feelings. They didn’t mean to – something came out of their mouth in a way that didn’t feel good to me. In my younger years, before I knew better, the words would have made me question myself, second-guess myself and before you know it, I would have been feeling a bit worthless, at least about that topic. When someone hurts your feelings, do you do that to yourself, too? That...

Are you feeling a little bit stuck in your life? Like you’re OK with where you are but you thought you’d be farther along by now? Where do you want to be? What do you want to have? When we were in school, our paths were mapped out for us – progression through classes and grades to earn graduation, so we could progress through more classes and years to graduation again. After school years, it’s eas...

Is there someone in your life that you make excuses for? My wasband, bless his heart, told me once that his friends were our friends and my friends were my friends. Consequently, when my friends would invite us to do things, he usually didn’t want to, and I usually made excuses for him. What the h-e-double-toothpicks was I thinking? I’ll tell you what – I wanted others to think well of him, so I d...

How much money is enough? How much love is enough? How much freedom is enough? And how do you decide? Chances are, if you’re like me, the answers to each of these questions varies by your mood, your current situation and how your life is going. If your beloved is leaving you because they don’t love you anymore, do you want just a little bit of their love or do you want your next beloved to love yo...

Is your workplace full of spats, pettiness or outright warfare at times? If you’re the manager, or even just in a senior role, do you often have to break things up and sort things out? Stop. Listen up. When spats, pettiness or worse keeps cropping up in your workplace, you don’t have a lack of discipline – you have a lack of respect. When co-workers continually bicker with each other and tattle on...

Is there someone who pushes your buttons? Or maybe you have a chain that they yank? You might be one of those delightfully old-school people who has a goat that people get? Whether it’s your buttons that get pushed, your chain that gets yanked or people get your goat, there is one common denominator – you. Yep, it’s you that owns whatever people keep pushing, yanking or getting. Your buttons. Your...

Did you ever do this, too? Did you ever try to get someone to like you, either as a friend or romantically, and it just never worked? Dad was career military, which meant our family moved every year or two while my brothers and I were growing up. Sometimes we’d land in a place filled with what felt like instant friends – sometimes, not so much. I remember trying to get one of my classmates to be m...

Is there someone in your life who seems depressed? Maybe they’re quieter than usual, more withdrawn than usual, or even seem really sad? Whether you like them, love them or could do without them, when you notice a personality down-shift, it’s a cry for help. Care about them enough to try to help. Ask them how they’re feeling. Ask them if something is wrong because you’ve noticed they seem sad. Ask...

Have you ever felt completely and totally misunderstood? Isn’t that the worst feeling? And it doesn’t matter how much you try to explain yourself, the other person is adamant that their interpretation of you and your motives is right and that you’re not a very nice person. Ouch! Please listen to this…think about this…analyze this…and then internalize this: what other people think of you is none of...

Let’s talk about ugly cries. The kind of crying where you feel like you are destined to cry until your entire body dries up from lack of moisture. The kind of crying where you use up every tissue in the house and move on to paper towels and they don’t even hurt. The kind of crying where it feels like the tears are flowing right out of your heart and it’s clenching up so tightly that it may never l...

Five-hundred-year-old seeds stored in London’s Museum of Natural History accidentally got wet and sprouted. Thousand-year-old lotus seeds were discovered, revived and are now flourishing plants producing new flowers and seeds. And seeds from a date palm that died 2000 years ago have produced trees of an extinct species. If you think of your dreams as seeds, which ones of yours have you put into st...

Have you ever trusted someone and they betrayed you? Oh, that’s a horrible feeling – first, the feeling of betrayal, and then the sense of disappointment and mistrust you might feel about yourself for trusting them in the first place! They betrayed you – nothing you can do about that. It was a choice they made, it was out of your control, and now the very best thing you can do is move on. Mov...

I have a chant for you…what do you want? Success! How do you get it? Focus! Whaaaaa? Yep, the key to success is how and where you focus. Focus on your dreams and the day-to-day steps needed to get you there and you’re on the way. Focus on what’s wrong and the daily grind and you’ll never get there. Yes, live in the now as much as you can. While you’re living in the now, focus on what’s going right...

Do you often feel disrespected? Forgotten about? Less than? If you feel like the people in your life treat you this way, you’re probably not feeling very good about yourself. Let’s change all that – go with me here. The way people treat you is a reflection of how you feel about yourself. People learn how to treat you by hearing how you talk about yourself and by what behavior you are willing to ac...

Ah, perfectionism – the bane of many of us, at least at certain points in our lives. Do you hold yourself to a very high standard? Do you hold others to a high standard, too? Are you often disappointed in yourself or in others? Then I bet you’re also pretty exhausted! When you’re tempted to beat yourself up because you didn’t do something perfectly, remind yourself that you’re human. You’ve learne...

The other day I was driving on the interstate. OK, I was speeding. A motorcyclist went by, going about 90 miles an hour. About 10 minutes later, the motorcyclist was in the lane in front of me, stuck in stand-still traffic. It was a hot, sunny, steamy southern day, the motorcyclist was in full leather gear and sitting on a hot engine, going nowhere and without the air conditioning the rest of us w...

Are you at a place in your life where you feel like a major decision needs to be made now and you’re not sure which direction to go? The bigger the decision feels, the worse the indecision feels. Try to step back from the details of the decision and daydream about the possibilities. Paint a movie in your head about how your life will look and feel if you decide one way. Then paint another movie in...

I have a confession to make – I’m a collector of stuff. Each time I get into purging mode and get rid of things, it feels so good. And then the next thing you know, I’ve found something new to bring home and love. Does this sound like you, too, even just a little bit? Maybe the rule I’ve made for me will be useful to you, too – at the beginning of each month I open up a closet or a cabinet and I g...