Tiny Bites of Wagaliciousness

Don’t you wish you could run out and get a shot of confidence? Sometimes, especially when doing something new, it’s very human to feel a lack of confidence. It’s also very human to bow to social conditioning that taught many of us that showing confidence was arrogant and wrong, so we learned to block our own feelings of confidence in order to be accepted by others. A lack of confidence doesn’t fee...

Pope Francis said, “If our hearts are closed, if our hearts are made of stone, the stones find their way into our hands and we are ready to throw them.” What a wonderful, visual way of reminding us that conflict comes from a lack of desire to understand and accept another point of view. Notice I said a lack of desire to understand, not a lack of understanding. It’s the desire to understand that’s...

Do you have a touchstone that you can use when you’re in a rough patch in your life? An inspirational phrase that calms your fears and helps you feel balanced? That’s a wonderful way to remind yourself that the rough patch is simply that – a chapter in your life that you’ll move through and grow from. There was an attorney in Iowa named Max Ehrmann who wrote a poem called Desiderata in 1927, and i...

Do you use affirmations? Many people do, and they swear by the power of intentionally shaping their life experiences with affirmations. Many people have tried them and swear they just made things worse. Both groups of people are right – affirmations can help you shape your life experience positively, and can also keep you stuck or worse yet, can be detrimental to your wellbeing. The key is in your...

Do you have pets? The other day I saw a meme about talking to dogs and the silly things we say. I started listening to how I talk to my own two dogs and laughed, because the meme was right on target. Then, as I was headed to the kitchen to make something for lunch, I caught my brain telling me that I was too fat and flabby. Ouch! I thought about the “talking to dogs” meme and wondered how it would...

When I was a teenager, having to work on Saturday night was a huge issue that felt like it could change the trajectory of my love life forever. Now sometimes I choose to work on a Saturday night and it energizes me. What changed? In that example, both versions of me are working on a Saturday night. The young version of me resented it bitterly, while the older version of me is fulfilled by it. What...

Think about your day today – what is the one, very most important thing on your to-do list? Pay bills? Close a deal? Get a mammogram? Now think about this year – what is the one, very most important thing you have done so far this year? Start a new job or business? Support a friend going through a tough time? Take that dream trip you’ve always wanted to take? Now think about your life – what is th...

How’s your day going today? Is it flying by in a fit of productivity or does it feel like it’s already been about 6 years long? It’s so odd how some work days feel so good while some make you wonder why you’re even doing the work you’re doing. What’s the difference? Some days you feel inspired and some days you need external motivation to keep you moving forward. Those inspired days are wonderful...

The most important thing in any conversation, especially sensitive or difficult ones, is what’s not being said. People hold words inside for many reasons – they don’t want to hurt the person they’re talking to, they have a hard time admitting they’re wrong or they need help, or maybe they fear negative repercussions if they say what they really think. Learning to respond to the words that aren’t b...

A friend calls people who love to talk about other people a “puddin’ stick” because they like to stir the puddin’. Do you know someone like that? At some point in nearly everyone’s life they are the target of a puddin’ stick. It’s not fun – I say that from personal experience. When it happened to me the last time, I discovered the way to gut the gossiping person’s power – ignore them. Don’t defend...

When you feel all bound up in a problem, that feels pretty bad, doesn’t it? It can feel frustrating or disempowering or like you’re stuck in the center of a big ball of goo that you can’t see a way out of. When something in life has you feeling any of those feelings, use that big, wonderful brain of yours to solve the problem, or at least help you feel better until the problem is resolved. Here’s...

Life handed me lemons recently. Really disappointing, really expensive lemons. Has that ever happened to you? Something you’d planned didn’t work out, or something you’ve worked hard to achieve didn’t happen? It feels awful, doesn’t it? Not gonna lie, the day my lemons showed up wasn’t my most productive day, by a long shot. A lot of people will tell you to dig deep, tough it out, fake it ‘til you...

Do you love old Fleetwood Mac songs? The sound of Stevie Nicks’ voice enthralled me, and her lyrics inspired me. Her songs are often about the moment when life changes in a big way – like the painful betrayal that ends a relationship in The Chain and thinking about the mortality of a parent in Landslide. Even though her songs were often written as a way for her to get through the not-OK times in h...

Wellbeing isn’t about your physical body, it’s about your emotional state. Wellness is physical, and often what ails you isn’t physical at all. Down in the dumps … bored … melancholy … moody… heavy hearted – those are normal human ways to feel. We don’t celebrate them and we don’t seek them out, and sometimes we find ourselves in the grips of a lack of wellbeing. When that happens, try this – step...

We all have days where we might feel a bit unloved, taken for granted or unappreciated. I remember being a teenager and coming home from school, crying to Mom that nobody liked me and everyone treated me badly. She listened, and then did what felt like the strangest thing – she told me to stand up and walk across the room. I did, and then as I was about to walk back, she told me to look in the mir...

Someone I know works in a difficult environment. She is surrounded by people who aren’t her co-workers, they’re her competitors. The company fosters the competition between employees, and while some of them thrive in that environment, my friend doesn’t. The money is good. The benefits are solid. And she’s miserable. Instead of being proactive and looking for an environment more suited to her stren...

Mac McAnally and Jimmy Buffett wrote a song called "Changing Channels.” It’s a song that speaks to the desire to stay in one place even as the world changes around you, and plays with the word “channels” as life events and also as waterways to new destinations. What if you could view the changes that happen in your life as simply changing channels? Can you see the end of a relationship as just a c...

Are there people who have abused your good nature in the past? Maybe you valued them, and they betrayed you, and you feel “less than” from that experience. Can I offer you a different way to look at it? You went into the relationship – work, romance, whatever – with trust and an open heart. That takes courage. You gave them the benefit of the doubt, even when there were subtle warning signs. That...

Are you a fan of something? Chances are, you’re a fan of a lot of things – maybe your college sports team, a sport you play, a certain musician or type of music – most of us are fans of a lot of things. When you’re a fan, it means you’re focused on something in a positive way – appreciating it, hoping good things happen to it and for it, and finding ways to incorporate the object of your fan-dom i...

Pardon me if I burst into rhyme in this podcast – I’ll do my best to refrain from channeling Dr. Seuss. Did you have his books when you were a child? If you have children, do your children enjoy his silly words, rhymes and deep wisdom? Yes, wisdom from Dr. Seuss – his books are filled with wisdom and life skills tucked in among the colorful pictures. One of my favorite Dr. Seuss-isms is “you have...

Someone has done you wrong. You could probably tell the story of how they broke a promise, took something you valued or even physically harmed you. And to a lot of people, the worst part of that wrongdoing is that the person never owned it, never apologized, never made amends. They just went on with their life, leaving you to deal with the aftermath. How do I know this about you? Because everyone...

Were you taught to say “please” and “thank you” when you were a child? In my family those words were called magical, and what we wanted didn’t happen without a “please” attached to it, so they did feel kind of magical. And “thank you” has a hidden, even more magical power. Most of us remember – at least some of the time – to thank those who do things for us. When we thank them we make that other p...

Possibly the most potent word in any language is “possibility.” The possibility of something is where innovation happens. The possibility of improvement is where change happens. The king of harnessing the power of possibilities was inventor Thomas Edison, who said “When you’ve exhausted all possibilities, remember this – you haven’t.” If something is feeling impossible to you today, shift your foc...

Have you ever counseled a friend and said something like, “you’re looking for love in all the wrong places?” Heck, there’s even at least one old country song with that title! Brain science is clear – humans gravitate to the familiar, even when it’s bad for them. This is as true of relationships as it is with food, tobacco and alcohol. One of the main ways most humans create their own stress is by...

Are you a type-A personality? Driven to achieve, a bit of a perfectionist and someone who moves from goal to goal without stopping to celebrate your achievements? A lot of leaders are just like that, so if that’s you, you’re in good company. A lot of leaders suffer from stress, lack of work/life balance and disillusionment, and if that’s you, then here’s an easy tool to help you find more balance...