This Complex Life

What if one partner wants to work on the relationship and the other isn’t sure they want to stay? In this episode, I talk with therapist Anne Carter about discernment counselling, a structured and supportive process for couples where one or both partners are ambivalent about staying together. We explore what makes this approach different from traditional couples therapy and how it helps couples ma...

Wondering if your relationship should involve more sex or comparing yourself to what you think is normal? You're not alone. Many couples quietly struggle with mismatched desire, emotional disconnection or unclear expectations about what intimacy should look like. In this episode, I talk about what it really means to not be having enough sex, how responsive desire plays a role in long-term relation...

What happens when love meets change? In this episode we explore the unique challenges and strengths of queer and gender diverse relationships, especially when one partner is transitioning. Therapist Jani Forest Wyatt joins me to unpack the myths, the moments of growth, and the importance of inclusive and affirming couples therapy. Jani shares insights from both professional and personal experience...

There’s a lot of advice about what to do to build a strong relationship. But what about the things emotionally healthy couples don’t do? Join me, Marie Vakakis, a therapist, mental health, and relationships educator. In this episode, I explore six common habits that can damage trust, connection, and communication—and why avoiding them can make a big difference. Key takeaways: Sarcasm, eye-rolling,...

Ever caught yourself thinking, "They should just know what I need"? Unspoken expectations are one of the biggest sources of frustration in relationships. When our partners don’t automatically meet our needs, it can leave us feeling unheard, unloved, or even resentful. But here’s the thing—expecting someone to read your mind rarely works. Join me, Marie Vakakis, and my guest, psychotherapist Tracy...

In tough times, joy can feel out of reach. But sometimes, a single shared laugh has the power to lift the weight of the world—even in a hospital room, a funeral, or a difficult conversation. In this special episode, I’m adding my voice to Podcasthon , a global movement of over 1,600 shows across 47 countries. Instead of just mentioning a charity at the end, I wanted to go deeper and dedicate this...

Ever feel like you and your partner are just co-existing rather than truly connecting? Maybe your conversations revolve around schedules, bills, and logistics, rather than shared experiences and meaningful moments. Join me, Marie Vakakis , therapist, mental health and relationships educator, as I share why friendship is the foundation of a strong relationship, how couples drift apart over time, an...

Couples therapy isn’t just about fixing relationship problems—it can also play a huge role in improving mental health. Many people think of therapy as a last resort when things are falling apart, but research shows that relationship support can also help with anxiety, depression, trauma, and emotional regulation. I’m joined by Trish Purnell-Webb, a clinical psychologist, certified Gottman therapis...

Ever had a small disagreement spiral into a huge argument? Maybe it started with an eye-roll, a forgotten text, or a messy kitchen bench. Suddenly, it’s not about the dishes—it’s about feeling unheard, unappreciated, or disconnected. Join me, Marie Vakakis, a therapist, mental health, and relationships educator. In this episode, I unpack why small fights often mask deeper issues, how to tell the d...

Many couples only seek therapy when their relationship is already in serious trouble. But by the time they reach out, years of unresolved issues, built-up resentment, and unhealthy patterns can make it harder to repair their connection. So, what happens when couples wait too long to get support, and why is early intervention so important? Join me Marie Vakakis, a therapist, and mental health and r...

Why do we keep having the same fight? It can feel frustrating when the same arguments keep coming up. But conflict is not the problem. It is how we handle it that makes the difference. Research shows that most relationship conflicts are ongoing, yet avoiding them only builds resentment. The good news is that conflict, when managed well, can actually strengthen trust and connection. I am Marie Vaka...

Have you ever wondered when the right time is to try couples therapy? Or if you even need a major issue to start? Many people hesitate to seek support for their relationship, often waiting years before getting help—sometimes even separating without exploring their options. Today, we’re tackling the most common questions about couples therapy, from how to know if it’s right for you to what actually...

Have you ever wondered why grief feels so isolating? Many people expect grief to follow a straight path, something to "move on" from after a set amount of time. The reality is far more complex. In this episode, I sit down with psychologist and grief researcher Liam Spicer to explore what grief is, the myths that surround it, and how we can better support ourselves and others through loss. Grief is...

How Past Experiences Shape Our Lives Why do certain situations trigger such strong emotions? Katheryn Eberly, a mental health social worker and family therapist, joins me to explore how early experiences shape our beliefs, why past wounds still affect us, and how we can start to shift unhelpful patterns. Key Takeaways Trauma affects how we see ourselves and respond to stress. "Big T" trauma stems...

Have you ever wondered if your goals truly reflect what’s most important to you? In this episode, clinical psychologist Patch Callahan joins me to break down the difference between values and goals and why living by your values is the key to a more meaningful and fulfilling life. We explore how to uncover your core values, navigate challenges in defining them, and integrate them into your everyday...

Have you ever found yourself questioning your drinking habits or wondering why alcohol feels so deeply woven into our social lives? This episode will inspire you to take a closer look at addiction, coping strategies, and the pressures around drinking. In this episode, I sit down with psychologist Tara Hurster, an expert in addiction and substance use, to challenge the myths surrounding addiction a...

Holidays are meant to be magical, but let’s be honest – they can also be a whirlwind of stress, unmet expectations, and arguments over things like... ham on napkins. Ever found yourself mid-fight during the holiday season, wondering, “What are we even fighting about?” This episode is for you. As a therapist, I see this all the time in my sessions: couples bickering over seemingly small things that...

Does the holiday season leave you feeling stressed and overcommitted? With endless parties, gift exchanges, and family gatherings, it’s easy to say yes to everything and forget about your own needs. In this episode, I’m sharing how to set boundaries that protect your energy, time, and budget, so you can truly enjoy the festive season without the burnout. I’ll explore why setting boundaries matters...

If you’ve ever wondered why your teen seems on edge or overwhelmed, you’re not alone. Anxiety in teens can feel daunting to understand and even harder to navigate. In this episode, I break down the basics of anxiety, what might be going on with your teen, and how you can truly support them. Whether it’s about recognising the signs, fostering empathy, or knowing when to seek help, this episode is p...

Ever wondered why your teen sometimes seems to be on an emotional rollercoaster? In this episode, I tackle a question that’s close to home for many parents: Why does my teen seem so moody? Instead of brushing it off as "just a phase," I explore what’s really going on for teens emotionally and mentally, from hormonal changes to the social pressures they face every day. If you've ever been met with...

Ever wondered why your teenager suddenly seems to prefer hanging out with friends over family dinners or weekend outings? In this episode, I’ll be talking through some of the key reasons teens begin to pull away from family time, focusing on the natural shifts in social priorities and independence that come with adolescence. It’s not about rejection, though it might feel that way; it’s a complex s...

Ever feel like your teen is constantly overwhelmed and stressed, but you're unsure how to help without making things worse? In this episode, I’m sharing practical ways you can support your teen when life feels like it’s coming at them too fast. Whether it's school pressures, social media, or the daily juggle of activities, teens today face a lot. I’ll help you understand why they might be feeling...

Have you ever asked your teen a question, only to be met with silence or a shrug? It’s frustrating, right? This is a common concern for parents. I hear this concern a lot.  In this episode, I’m answering this common question I get from parents ‘’why won’t my teen talk to me?”  I’ve heard so many parents share that they feel disconnected or rejected when their child turns to friends inste...

Have you ever thought about sneaking a look at your teen’s diary?  It’s something a lot of parents consider, especially when they're worried about their teen or feeling out of the loop. But is it the best move?  In today’s episode, I’m digging into whether reading your teen’s private thoughts helps or harms your relationship, and how you can stay connected without crossing that line. Thi...

I share a powerful concept that can transform your relationships – bids for connection . These small moments when someone reaches out, whether it’s your partner or your teen, can make all the difference in how we build trust and emotional intimacy. How we respond – whether we turn towards, turn away, or respond unkindly – shapes the quality of our relationships. I explore how noticing and respondi...