TheWillpowerPodcast with Will Gordon

Most of us don’t really understand what it’s like to love someone deep in addiction...until we’re living it. In this earnest and valuable conversation, Anita Ondine Smith opens up about being married to former NBA player Randy Livingston while he battled gambling addiction for over two decades. She shares the confusion, the shame, the moments she felt completely lost, and how she learned that love...

Most people think beating addiction comes down to having more willpower. Chris Hill says that’s one of the biggest mistakes you can make. In this episode, we break down why willpower eventually runs out, what’s actually happening in the brain when cravings return, and how rewiring your mind (instead of white-knuckling) creates real, lasting freedom. Chris is the founder of Beat My Addictions and a...

In this raw and honest conversation, author David Deane Haskell joins me to talk about what happens after you survive rock bottom. We dive into trauma, inner child work, shame attacks, codependency, and why recovery isn’t a straight line or a highlight reel. David shares how he learned to stop performing healing and started doing the real, messy work — including a powerful technique for connecting...

In this episode, I sit down with Evan Jarschauer, a licensed psychotherapist and one of the most experienced interventionists in the country. Evan has led interventions for families from all walks of life — including one that aired on Keeping Up with the Kardashians . We talk about what actually happens during a real intervention, the emotional weight of the job, and some of the heaviest cases he’...

Matt Farnsworth had 11 years of sobriety… then everything fell apart. In this raw and powerful conversation, Matt shares how a toxic relationship, a relapse, and a horrific car accident that left him dead for 3 minutes completely changed his life. He opens up about white-knuckling sobriety, codependency, Hollywood darkness, and the moment he finally cried out to God on a bathroom floor. This is on...

This episode is raw, emotional, and deeply personal. Nathan Cheatwood is a liver transplant survivor who went through end-stage liver failure from alcohol addiction in 2023. He received his new liver after only 10 days on the transplant list and turned his entire journey into the world’s first AI-assisted autobiographical short film called “Second Chances: Rebirth.” In this conversation we talk ab...

Family, that’s Shawn Livingston — four-time felon, heroin survivor, ultra-runner, and living proof that your lowest moment can become your greatest purpose Shawn Livingston went from high school basketball star to Air Force vet, heroin addict, 4-time felon, and prison time… until a mirror moment and a simple running group changed everything. He shares the raw truth about recovery bubbles, Scientol...

Hey everybody, welcome back to The Willpower Podcast. I was a Boston teacher sneaking bottles, blacking out, and waking up yellow-eyed in a hospital bed with doctors telling my wife I had two weeks left. Liver and kidneys gone. Two transplants later I’m sober, but I still remember the crushing shame that kept pulling me back every time I slipped. Today Chris Cummins (operations at Laguna Treatment...

This episode is part of Podcasthon 2026 — thousands of podcasts dropping special episodes to spotlight nonprofits and raise funds for addiction recovery. I’m honored to feature Hazelden Betty Ford because their work saves lives and it’s personal for me. Joseph Skrajewski (National Director of Business Development – Healthcare Solutions at Hazelden Betty Ford) joins me for a raw, honest conversatio...

Hey family, it's Will Gordon on The Willpower Podcast. Two years ago yellow-eyed in a hospital bed, kidneys/liver gone from blackouts—docs said two weeks. Two transplants later, sober, but I still know the numb fog when life's grinding you down. Jon Gustin—@thetireddad to over 2 million followers—gets it from the dad side. First kid in 2016 hit like a mirror: childhood stuff undone, marriage holes...

I know transplant hell—yellow eyes, sepsis scares, rejection fears, the mental limbo after waking up with someone else's organ keeping you alive. Two transplants later, sober and fighting, but I still remember the grind. Today's guest? Daniel Eadle, UK dad, husband, multi-genre drummer, and CEO of his heating business. Diagnosed at 19 with PSC (primary sclerosing cholangitis) and autoimmune hepati...

Three years sober after a liver transplant that almost killed me... but the brain fog, guilt, and that constant pull back to chaos? Still real as hell. In this raw convo with Dr. Tiff Thompson (PhD neuro, neurotherapy CEO, BCN/QEEG expert), we break down why shame and tough love backfire in addiction recovery, how your brain gets wired for cravings (low GABA profiles, dopaminergic burnout, default...

Dan Sheridan (@mrsheridanshusband on TikTok, @danman147 on IG) shares the unfiltered story of drinking 18+ tins of Stella + 10 pints daily until liver failure nearly killed him. From blackout mornings, vomiting, re-drinking, a suicide-level paracetamol/Stella plan, massive GI bleed ("blood everywhere like stigmata"), to being told "plan your funeral," Dan fought through 3 years sober while on/off...

Andrew Mondragon — Marine veteran, dad, husband, oilfield worker — was diagnosed with end-stage liver disease in June 2025. Dropped from 317 to 190 lbs. MELD score 29. Accepted for liver transplant eval at OHSU. Still cracking jokes while fighting for his life and family. He shares the raw truth: the first signs (back pain, yellow eyes, 14 liters of fluid drained), functional alcoholism (4 shots F...

Amber Hollingsworth (@puttheshoveldown), a master addiction counselor with 700k+ on YouTube, joins me to show families how to intervene early with compassion, not ultimatums or tough love. We talk: The myth that “there’s nothing you can do” Functional alcoholism & enabling traps Real boundaries (rules for yourself, not control) Why waiting for rock bottom is dangerous Rebuilding trust after so...

Ryan Barrett (@ryanbarrett90) should be dead multiple times over: molested at 8, buried the shame in death metal, rebellion, blackouts, hard drugs, a near-fatal car wreck (femur shattered in 7 places), suicide attempt, yellow eyes, and a blackout knife night that almost ended everything. One morning he poured out his last glass of spiced rum, begged for help, and got sober for real. Now 2+ years s...

Mike Faria (@jerzeymike) shares his raw journey – from guilt over his cousin's drunk driving death, 5 years of daily drinking, to a 3-week coma in 2020 with yellow eyes, fluid buildup, kidneys failing, and doctors prepping his family for the worst. He woke up anyway, got sober on August 23, 2022, rebuilt his body, his family, met the love of his life, and became the family man he always intended t...

Richard Ratcliffe (@ the.recovery.club - 100k+ followers) joins the Willpower Podcast for a raw, heartfelt talk on his 9-year sober journey. From childhood shame and "wearing masks" to fit in, to daily 2 liters of vodka leading to seizures, an induced coma at 24, and doctors warning "you won't make 25" - Richard opens up about waking up angry to be alive, true surrender, turning grief into purpose...

Chester Alarie, a 34-year-old musician from Montreal, opens up about his 17-year battle with drugs and alcohol that led to depression, multiple rock bottoms, a near-fatal overdose, and alcohol withdrawal in January 2024. FULL DISCLOSURE> YOU WILL ABSOLUTELY WANT TO LISTEN TO THE END. THIS EPISODE IS AS ENTERTAINING AS A RECOVERY PODCAST CAN GET! After rehab, relapses, and finally working the 12...

What's up everyone, Will Gordon here from The Willpower Podcast. This one's a banger – sat down with Quebec country rocker Rick Duff @Duff.yeehaw , who's 6 months sober and absolutely crushing it with his debut album Forever Reckless . Rick lays it all out: going from bricklayer to Canada's got talent show finale overnight, the wild party days in his 20s, those "loser birds" chirping after all-nig...

Dr. Sarah Michaud spent 30 years as a clinical psychologist helping addicts and codependents climb out of hell… only to wake up one day and realize she was living in the exact same hell. From people-pleasing therapist to full-blown addict and codependent, she hit rock bottom, got sober, wrote the raw book Co-Crazy , and now co-hosts the hit podcast Leaving Crazy Land . This conversation is differe...

Philippa and I were both handed death sentences from alcohol. I needed a liver transplant and barely survived. Philippa was told the exact same thing… but she completely reversed end-stage cirrhosis – no transplant, no miracle pills, no BS. 999 days to get her liver enzymes normal. A resident doctor cried when he saw her alive two years later. This is the rawest, most hopeful liver-failure recover...

Aaron Starbuck just got the green light. His liver transplant is officially approved and could happen any day… maybe even tonight. His first reaction wasn’t relief. It was terror. I know exactly how he's feeling and I talk openly about my OWN experience. Imagine being able to talk to someone whose on the other side of it? Well Aaron gets that opportunity. “I knew it was coming… but I’m repulsed by...

🤝From a second-story fall that started a decade of panic attacks, to blackouts I’m still ashamed of, to not believing I’d see 30 — Mitch Webb somehow found a way out. Today he’s an integrative somatic coach helping people speak their body’s language and heal from the inside. In this episode, Mitch gets real about: - The head injury that changed everything - Fraternity life and the “no off switch”...

After two suicide attempts, losing her baby son to a terminal illness, a marriage that ended in scandal, and then — 4+ years sober — getting the call that her ex-husband overdosed on fentanyl… Ashley Jo somehow kept going. Today she’s a sober mom, bonus mom, author, and speaker who’s been alcohol-free since August 14, 2020. On the exact release day of her gut-wrenching new memoir Tides of Grief, W...