The Wild She: She Speaks

Excerpts from: make a fucking scene – conclusion “ I was never really a good girl. I don’t know if any female is ever actually really created to be a good girl. All I know is that I’m not one of them and I don’t think I’ll ever pretend to be one again.” “ I remember standing in the field at our house, wine glass in hand, fist to the sky, ranting and raving, telling God that I wasn’t changing anyth...

Excerpts from: make a fucking scene – part one “ tenderly she asked me: what does She want to do? She? Yes. The She that lives in your body.” “ my pendulum was way on the extreme side, and as a result, I earned a title. A reputation.”

Excerpts from: Saudade “ saudade is a feeling of longing, melancholy, desire, and nostalgia. It describes a deep emotional state; a yearning for a happiness that has passed, or perhaps never even existed.” “ this is her second marriage. The first one was nothing short of a horror. A Dumpster fire, in modern day terms.”

Exerts from: reminders of redemption – part two and conclusion “ in order to tell the rest of the story, I need to take you back to mid May of that same year – 2016. I just been blindsided by information about my husband that no wife ever wants to find out.” “ an embryonic intimacy and respect was blooming between us. I realize now that it was the beginning of redemption, for both of us.

Excerpts from: reminders of redemption – part one “ the story I’m about to tell isn’t one. I’m particularly proud of. I’ve told the story to many, but omitted the background details in most cases. The details of what led up to the actual event.” “ he and I have a mutual respect and trust with each other. He wasn’t going to let me out of this. Appealed the bandages off and saw the look on his face....

Excerpts from Squeezeturn: “ I wondered, though, how many times have I squeezedturned, instead of squeezing and turning.” “There are just some things in life that require a loving process. No shortcuts.”

Excerpts from: hope, my journey of life and growth with Jesus by Amy Jeffcoat “Hope. It’s easy to talk about. It’s easy to say, have hope. It’s easy to tell others. It sounds beautiful and it looks beautiful when you see it. But have you seen what is underneath it or behind it when you have seen it beautifully spoken about?” “ Peace is doing the uncomfortable. Sitting with yourself in the uncomfor...

Excerpts from: Marionette Theatre “ if Should Be was a person, it would be highly narcissistic in nature, ADHD in its actions and Machiavellian in its thoughts. A psychopath in totality.” “ be a slave to me, it asks. And yet, I sit a corrupted Shiva with the past. Not grieving in order to heal, but stuck and dug in. Arms crossed and bottom lip poked out – not willing to leave the stinking, putrid...

Excerpts from: snafu “ I didn’t know then and still don’t know now, if that’s an accurate explanation of the extra days and I decided I didn’t want to know for sure. I just want mini resurrections.” “ i’m well accustomed to death, but not this kind of death. Not the kind where something is killed and gone, but still around. Not the kind where I can still see it, but it isn’t a functioning part of...

Excerpts from: that word “ a relative of mine emailed me last night. She is concerned with my use of the F word in my writings.” “ what is taboo to you, is poetry to me.”

Excerpts from: tender mercies “ my mom‘s death was expected. She’s been diagnosed with breast cancer 20 years before and had cycled into remission and relapse several times. I think we all knew that she wouldn’t live to be an old woman. I think she knew it too.” “ they were mini reprieves for my grief. A deep restorative breath so that we could keep going.”

Excerpts from: little dreams “ my fear inevitably takes over, no matter what angle I come up with.” “ she continued – suggesting to me that maybe I’m not so scared of the actual doing of it, but in the giving myself permission to enjoy the experience of doing it.”

Excerpts from: pendulum “ neither one working, but my ego, bound and determined, that given enough force or disregard, the flesh would prevail.” “ force an apathy removed, though, and the pendulum will eventually in fairly quickly, return to Center.”

Excerpts from: Less overcorrections, more glimmers – a submitted writing by Wendy Graham: “As I embrace the more woo side of myself, I’ve read a lot this weekend about the energy of the new moon and how now is the most potent time to plant seeds of what you’d like to cultivate in the future. I want more peace. Not a pony or 1 million bucks. I want peace and ease and joy.” “ I started to rattle off...

Excerpts from: It’s never about the garlic “I’m here to think about the bigger picture, because we all know that the same scenario, in some fashion, played itself out in homes across the world last night.” “The last night my ex-husband and I ever spent the night together with our kids, in our house, we had a massive argument. About garlic.”

Excerpts from: Inside out “Recently, I’ve been having big thought dreams – ones that will take organization and logistical planning and smaller thought dreams that will be fairly easy to achieve.” “What they never are is stagnant or crazy making like they would be if they stayed in my brain.”

Excerpts from: Rescue “Brené Brown calls endeavors like this an FFT – first fucking time. She encourages lots of reality, boundaries around expectations, and grace, in order to make the experience, not completely horrifying and traumatizing.” “Colton rounded the corner of the dugout, I moved in even closer… and he popped his head up and looked dead into my eyes. Those eyes told me: NO.”

Excerpts from: Warning – the coffee is hot in my feelings are complicated “I’m still a little high and a whole lot hung over from what I wrote about over the past three days.” “I’m thinking about how if I never witnessed my elder close-ones moving through the grief process for more than a week or two how could I even begin to know how mind bending, soul wrenching and necessary grieving is?”

Excerpts from: Possession- a submitted writing by Monroe S. Evers: “But when you’re a possession, you always think of your owner first.” “In someone else’s clothes, in someone else’s bed. For this moment, I was safe.”

Excerpts from A Love Letter To Myself, My Children, and My Future Partner- PART 3 : “This is me. These are my nonnegotiables:…” “#11. Sometimes I don’t wear deodorant. I love the way I smell – the natural way I smell. It reminds me of where I came from. Also, sometimes I don’t groom, especially in the winter.”

Excerpts from A Love Letter To Myself, My Children, and My Future Partner- PART 2: “From the age of around 15 years old, I’ve let men fill my bucket with whatever the hell they want.” “I’ve had men dissect the way my body looks – tell me how to groom myself, not groom, myself, cut my hair, grow my hair, wear this, wear that, you’re not tall enough, don’t wear those shoes because then you’ll be too...

Excerpts From A Love Letter to Myself, My Children, and My Future Partner- PART 1 : “Even as I begin to write this, I am seething. White hot. Free basing rage with a 10” diameter pipe.” “ I thought about dialing the rage back, but no: it’s my mind, my heart, my words, my Paige, my experience – so I’m going to use whatever words I fucking want to.”

Excerpts from Two Twitches and a Scream: “It start says physical independence and moves onto mental and emotional independence. That’s one more thing to take off my list.” “Waiting to see if I’m going to be able to shake it myself.”

Excerpts from Love Bites: “It taps into deep suffering and pain. Divorced from one husband, death took the second husband.” “He’s asking me to lay down some pretty heavy armor, redirect my brain and open my heart.”

Excerpts from I Don’t Wanna: “I’m just kind of uninspired, but also excited about the day and I’m telling myself that I need a break. I deserve a break.” “I know that the morning discipline of: wash the face, brush the hair, make the coffee, sit down and write, sets the tone of my day, sets the level of dedication to integrity for myself and to other people.”