The Virtual Couch

Tony shares his excitement over one of the founders of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Dr. Steven Hayes' new book A Liberated Mind, How to Pivot Toward What Matters https://amzn.to/34w72BT Tony reviews Dr. Hayes 6 key "pivots" of ACT and how even simply an understanding of these pivots can lead to a fairly immediate pivot toward psychological flexibility, which in turn points you toward a more...

Part 3 of 2 of Tony's discussion of his ADHD (ADD inattentive type) diagnosis. In this episode, Tony goes more into some of the diagnostic criteria including a couple of lists of behaviors often associated with ADD-like symptoms (trust me, it's more entertaining than it sounds!). Even if you don't personally suffer from ADHD, there's a good chance someone in your family does. This episode is desig...

Tony Overbay, LMFT interviews Joshua Shea about their newly released book "He's a Porn Addict...Now What? An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions" now available on Amazon https://amzn.to/33fk0U4 . The book debuted in the number 1 spot in the Sexual Health Recovery category and has received numerous positive reviews from professionals in the mental health and recovery fields. Tony and J...

Wait! Don't skip this episode! I know if you're a podcast listener you've no doubt heard therapist and life coach alike gush about the benefits of mindfulness, about meditation, about being present. Well, what does that actually mean? What's the science behind the practice and how do you push through if you've tried it a time or two and felt like it just didn't work for you? In this episode, Tony...

In today's episode, Tony takes a deep dive into the article "How the Narcissistic Trauma Bond Ensnares" by Christine Hammond, MS, LMHC. Christine is a two-time former Virtual Couch podcast guest, and host of the popular, and informative podcast "Understanding Today's Narcissist." In the article, Christine shares the definition of the term trauma bonding, which is loyalty and continued commitment t...

Learn tangible, positive ways to help you take control of your parenting today! In this solo episode, Tony Overbay, LMFT, goes into detail, with personal examples, of how to actually implement the Nurtured Heart Parenting approach with your small, or teenage children. Tony dives into the three stands of the Nurtured Heart Approach: Stand 1, refuse to be drawn into energizing or rewarding negativit...

Rachel Nielson, the host of the popular podcast 3 in 30 Takeaways for Moms ( http://3in30podcast.com ) makes a return visit to The Virtual Couch to discuss the challenges of finding the right therapist for you, and/or your kids. Rachel talks about what first led her to therapy, and how a negative experience with her first therapist didn't stop her from continuing to find a therapist who could, and...

One of the requests that I receive the most is to do an episode on psychopaths vs. sociopaths or narcissists. In this episode, I cover all three, including a fascinating article in The Atlantic, "Life as a Nonviolent Psychopath" https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/01/life-as-a-nonviolent-psychopath/282271/ where interviewer Judith Ohikuare talks to American neuroscientist Dr. James Fal...

One of the most unproductive phrases Tony hears in couples counseling is “I’m just playing Devil’s advocate?” Are you? Or are you trying to poke holes in your partner’s reality? Only the “devil” in this scenario truly knows, but regardless, there’s even a productive way to GET TO the playing of the role of “devil’s advocate” and that is by first creating an environment where you are able to hear y...

Pastor Chris Jung of Summit Christian Church ( http://mysummit.church ), located in Lincoln, CA, joins Tony to discuss the challenges of discussing mental health-related topics such as anxiety, depression, and suicide in the faith community. The podcast begins with a one-on-one interview with Pastor Chris where he discusses his path toward church service, including his own mental health struggles...

Beckie Hennessy, LCSW joins Tony to talk about the Love and Logic parenting method. From the Love and Logic website https://www.loveandlogic.com/a/info/love-and-logic-parenting “Raise happy and well-behaved kids with positive, loving tools. The Love and Logic approach to parenting is built around the science of caring and respectful relationships. An authentic, loving connection between parents an...

Elisabeth Mortensen, aka Eat, Squat, Mom returns to The Virtual Couch! Elisabeth talks about the four steps that she took to help her love her body, and Tony weaves in principals from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy into the steps. The steps she discusses not only apply to loving your body, or having a better body image, but also to embracing any sort of change in your life. You can read the ori...

Do you have kids, ever plan on having them, or were you once a kid yourself? Have you ever asked yourself at any time over the last few years, "What up with kids these days?" This episode will answer that question, and so many more! In this special bonus episode, Tony Overbay, LMFT, was interview by Tawni Beardall and Erica Peterson, hosts of the popular podcast "Becoming, A Podcast for Teens." Th...

Can the language one uses lead to a more successful diagnosis of a mental health condition than in talking with a therapist? What exactly is the “language of depression” and more importantly, what can we learn from it? In today’s episode Tony Overbay, LMFT, reviews an article by Mohammed Al-Mosaiwi, a Ph. D. candidate at the University of Reading, in Berkshire, United Kingdom called “People with d...

I was asked to present at the Epic Marriage Summit , and my presentation is titled, "Learn More About Your Spouse in 30 Days Than In Your Entire Marriage!" You can watch it free, along with presentations by 32 other marriage experts from October 8th through the 10th by following this link . In this special bonus episode, I interview the Epic Marriage Summit's coordinator, Monica Tanner, host of On...

Tony Overbay, LMFT shares the results of a couple of studies that shed some light on why it can be more difficult, not impossible, for some men to develop empathy and what we all can do to be more empathetic. He then shares examples of how to truly listen to your partner, as well as more gaslighting examples, and tells how those can truly be the anti-empathy! Visit http://tonyoverbay.com and sign...

Brannon Patrick is an expert in the field of Betrayal Trauma, and he plays the role of "the Expert" in the popular podcast "The Betrayed, The Addict and The Expert." His podcast follows the recovery journey of Ashlynn and Coby, a couple who have been able to move forward as a result of the pain of betrayal and addiction. Brannon has developed several group systems and programs for addiction recove...

Kurt Francom, Executive Director of LeadingSaints.org , started the non-profit nine years ago hoping to simply provide a few additional tools to help members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to become better lay-leaders in their church assignments (callings).  Now, over the past nine years of existence, Leading Saints has connected Latter-day Saints to leadership principles throu...

Is laughter actually good for you? What if you feel like there isn't a lot of humor in your life? In this episode Tony covers the topic of humor from the therapist's point of view, by reviewing Laura Johnson, LMFT's article "Humor in Psychotherapy" https://positivepsychologynews.com/news/laura-lc-johnson/200906252693 as well as Helpguide.org's article "Laughter is the best medicine," https://www.h...

Ralphie Jacobs, the positive parenting expert from Simply on Purpose IG @simplyonpurpose and Tony Overbay, LMFT, share their top 5 parenting tips plus, Ralphie sings the Jacobs family song! Visit http://tonyoverbay.com and sign up to learn more about Tony's upcoming book: He's a Porn Addict, Now What? An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions. The Virtual Couch is sponsored by  http://Be...

Is chronic pain your mentor, or your master? Nicole Alldredge and Aisley Johnson, co-authors of The Mindflight Journal, join Tony Overbay, LMFT on episode 152 of the Virtual Couch Podcast. The Mindflight Journal was created to help you not only track your health, medication, and symptoms, but also take care of your mind through gratitude, growth, and creativity. You can find them on Instagram @min...

Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness and Stonewalling, also known by world renowned marriage researcher John Gottman as the Four Horsemen, are signs that your marriage may, or more likely is, in need of repair. Gottman, who, along with his wife Julie, run The Gottman Institute ( http://gottman.com ) a website for individuals, couples, parents and professionals alike that provides an incredible amoun...

Today we dive into the world of online therapy with Haesue Jo, a licensed marriage and family therapist, as well as the clinical support lead for Betterhelp.com. We discuss how Betterhelp.com was started, as well as what the client experience is like from the initial assessment through meeting with a licensed counselor. We tackle the pros and cons of online therapy, talk about financial aid, where...

Have you ever bought a new car, and then all of a sudden felt like everybody was driving the same model? The same can be said for almost any type of purchase, or hairstyle, even some of the phrases that you say, right? (See what I did there, have you noticed everyone saying "right" after almost all of their sentences, even if you don't agree with them?). Most likely you're experiencing what psycho...

In part 2 of a 2 part episode on ADHD, Tony Overbay LMFT shares his own personal journey of living with undiagnosed, untreated ADHD as well as what led him to seek help, the process of receiving a diagnosis, and what life has been like since the diagnosis and treatment. This episode tackles issues around impulsivity, as well as what the alternatives are to medication, and much more. Tony mentions...