The Vibrant Marriage Podcast

What do your earliest childhood experiences of attachment have to do with the way you interact with and relate to your spouse?  A whole lot, turns out.  In this episode we'll cover the 3 different types of attachment styles and how yours affects your marriage, as well as 3 common types of parental dynamics I've observed in my practice that can have an outsized impact on the way kids relate to thei...

Maintaining a sense of playfulness in marriage is so important, and the skillful use of humor can be a superpower that helps keep your relationship healthy and vibrant.  In this episode, Rachel talks about three kinds of humor that can pop up in marriage, what function they each have, and how to incorporate more of the the right kinds of humor that bring you closer and keep your friendship going s...

The World Cup is coming — and if one of you is a die-hard fan and the other is just trying to get through the month, this episode is for you. Rachel brought in her husband Stephen (a former college soccer coach and certified soccer obsessive) to talk through what it actually looks like to navigate a big sports season — or any major time commitment — without resentment building up on either side. W...

You didn't expect to find it. And now you can't stop thinking about it. If you've just discovered your husband is using porn, you're probably feeling betrayed, confused, and unsure what to do next. In this episode, I sit down with Cori Page, licensed Independent Marriage and Family Therapist (IMFT) and Certified Sex Addiction Therapist (CSAT), to bring you the clarity and compassion you need right...

Some marriage problems aren't fixed by better communication skills or a good therapist — they require something else entirely first. In this episode, Rachel gets honest about the five situations where couples therapy either won't work or isn't the right first step: domestic violence, unresolved infidelity, active addiction, personality disorders, and complex trauma. You'll learn why jumping straig...

Have you ever wondered why marriage is so much harder than you expected — even when you love your person? In Episode 17, Rachel puts on her armchair theologian hat to explore the real reason marriage is hard: not compatibility issues or unmet expectations, but the comprehensive brokenness that touches every corner of life and every human relationship. She walks through the four key themes of the b...

Does your marriage feel more like a roommate situation than a real friendship lately? You're not alone — and it doesn't have to stay that way. In Episode 16, therapist and relationship coach Rachel Engels unpacks the four most common reasons couples drift toward the "roommate dynamic," including the neuroscience behind why the butterflies fade, the survival-mode trap, the imbalance of who's actual...

Not sure whether to raise an issue with your spouse — or let it go? In this episode, Rachel gives you a practical framework for knowing when something is actually worth bringing up in your marriage — and when it's better to let it pass. You'll learn the three most common reasons we avoid hard conversations, a simple test for whether something is worth addressing (it comes down to resentment), and...

The news isn't just exhausting. It's affecting your marriage in ways you might not even realize. In this episode, Rachel gets honest about what's really happening when the daily headlines feel like too much — and what it means for your relationship when you and your spouse cope with it in completely different ways. One of you wants to talk about it all. The other one is tapped out. One of you is f...

What does it look like to actually build a future together — on purpose, as a team? Most couples aren't avoiding those conversations because they don't care. They're avoiding them because they don't know how to start. In this episode, Rachel sits down with coach Lori Quintero, who helps women start the conversations that align their life, money, and future with their partner so they can stop drift...

The empty nest phase is one of the most significant transitions in a marriage — and most of us don't start thinking about it until it's already knocking at the door.   In this episode, Rachel sits down with life coach and Be Well Resources founder Kathy Young-Deegan, just nine months into her own empty nest season after raising three children, to talk about what this transition is really like — an...

Hard seasons are not fun. Whether it's a hard chapter in your marriage or in your life overall, sometimes it takes everything we have just to get through — and our normal ways of coping can fall completely flat. So what do we do? And more importantly: is there any possible good that can come out of the seasons we never asked for? In this episode, Rachel gets personal, sharing some of the most diff...

What does it look like when codependency goes far beyond people-pleasing and becomes a true addiction that you can't find your way out of? In this raw and courageous episode, Rachel sits down with Lisa, a woman who spent years in the grip of chronic codependency, to hear her story firsthand. Lisa holds nothing back — sharing the thinking patterns, the behavior cycles, and the devastating impact he...

In this bonus episode, I'm inviting you into a guided imagination exercise designed to help you regulate your nervous system — anytime, anywhere you need it (just not while driving!). Using the power of visualization, deep breathing, and sensory detail, we'll take an imaginary walk in the woods together — feeling the ground underfoot, breathing in the trees, drawing on the quiet strength of nature...

Anxiety is one of the most common — and most misunderstood — challenges couples face together. When one partner struggles with anxiety or panic attacks, the other often feels helpless, frustrated, or like everything they try makes things worse. Sound familiar? In this episode, I sit down with my friend and fellow therapist Amy DiFrancia, a licensed marriage and family therapist who specializes in...

Many people think loving their spouse means keeping them happy. But when you start managing their moods, editing your needs, or feeling obligated to say yes when you mean no, the relationship slowly stops being mutual. In this episode, we explore how people-pleasing in marriage can slowly erode the kind of honest, mutually satisfying partnership most couples want. While it often comes from a lovin...

Somewhere along the road of marriage, motherhood, and responsibility, many women slowly lose touch with parts of themselves. The hobbies that used to bring joy. The things that sparked curiosity. The parts of your identity that had nothing to do with managing schedules, caring for everyone else, or keeping life running. In this episode, I’m sharing a personal story about a season when I realized I...

There are seasons in marriage when you’re not at your best — when work is overwhelming, a parent is sick, the kids aren’t sleeping, your energy is gone, and it feels like you have nothing left to give. In this episode, we’re talking about what it looks like to stay connected when you’re running on empty. Instead of pushing harder or expecting more from yourself (or your spouse), we’ll explore how...

Have you ever tried to solve a conflict in the middle of frustration… and only made things worse? When emotions run high, even the most loving couples can get stuck in cycles of tension, defensiveness, and miscommunication. In this episode of The Vibrant Marriage Podcast, we’re talking about why emotional regulation in marriage is the key to healthy communication—and why calm clarity matters more...

Some differences in marriage aren’t going anywhere. The dirty socks. The different communication styles. The personality quirks. The habits that make you think, “How are we still having this conversation?” In this episode of The Vibrant Marriage Podcast, we’re talking about how to navigate the so-called “unsolvable problems” in marriage—and why many of them aren’t actually problems to fix, but dif...

Feeling stretched thin by the endless chores, mental load, and daily responsibilities at home? In this episode of The Vibrant Marriage Podcast, we talk about how to rebalance the load in marriage without resentment or scorekeeping. You’ll learn why internal attitudes like control and entitlement often keep couples stuck—and how to use self-advocacy and sacrifice to create healthier teamwork that b...

In this episode of The Vibrant Marriage Podcast, we'll discuss why staying on the same team in marriage matters more than ever under stress. You’ll learn 3 key concepts to help you stay connected, communicate with clarity, and face life’s challenges together, even when stress tries to divide you.