The Transman and His Queen

It's the "tangents" episode! Stick with Rowan and Devin as they discuss 2025, vision boards, manifesting, being all of who we are, trusting our training, uncle so and so being a turd, trusting our heart to guide us, leaving space in our goals, and staying out of the chaos so we can hear the whispers.  The Transman and his Queen is a listener supported podcast. To support our work please consider s...

We've been hearing a lot about resilience lately. Some say it's important while others say no thanks-they'd rather not have to be so resilient. Rowan and Devin get into how they feel about it. They talk about challenges, getting stronger, and how recovery is essential to it. Devin discusses the courage and persistence of the trans community and "the pain of resistance versus the gain of resilience...

These are challenging times. In the wake of the Nov. 5, 2024 US election results, Rowan and Devin talk about responding to something that unexpectedly slams us to the mat. What do we do now? They say "we are strong, resilient and we know how to love." Devin shares about the amount of determination it takes to live as a trans person. And Rowan discusses, from a black belt perspective, finding our s...

Heather Pace, chef, owner of Sweetly Raw Desserts, author, and Instagram foodie, joins Rowan to discuss her journey from dating men to finding true love with a woman. Heather shares about chasing the fairytale life we're all taught to want, finally saying enough, and finding love. She talks about how cultural norms got in the way of love and a real relationship and how love is love. Visit Heather'...

Rowan and Devin got together 5 years ago, then 2 years into their relationship Devin transitioned, female to male. Did Rowan lose the woman she fell in love with? Did she have to grieve the loss of that woman? She fell in love with a woman but now he's a dude. Devin changed his pronouns from she/her to he/him. These are facts, but did Rowan lose anyone? Or anything? How did she deal with that and...

Rowan says she's a queer woman in love with a transman and that doesn't fit labels. What does one do about that? She talks about putting love before labels and how we need to, as a greater LGBTQIA+ community, stop making each other feel like we're not enough! Not gay enough, not lesbian enough, not whatever enough. She mentions Bisexual Awareness Week and how labels both help us and hurt us. This...

Rowan and Devin discuss the question what's in Devin's pants and other innapropriate things to say to a trans person. Are questions ok? Not ok?  They talk about Dan Levy, Jodie Foster, Nava Mau, and LGBTQ+ representation at the Emmys. Devin gets passionate about seeing the common humanity in people and they both get into chosen names, pronouns, expression and identity. The transman and his Queen i...

Rowan and Devin play This or That?  Among other things, they talk about: How neither of them does binaries or rules well Devin's dream to drive a Monster truck Rowan's love of Montreal bagels That cars have no gender! Drag baseball Laverne Cox The L Word "Hot Dog" in French Going to the gym as a trans person Rowan chooses "girlboy" Drag brunch More at Devin's  TikTok Rowan's  TikTok   The transman...

Rowan talks about Olympic Champion boxer Imane Khelif, the controversy that errupted around her and triumph over hate. As a woman who has trained in full contact fighting, Rowan has things to say about the ignorance of those who spread the misinformation and hate around Khelif's gender and who called her out for being trans and lying. (All false) Rowan shares how she and Devin get hate comments an...

Rowan gets into love and gender and how we tend to consider a transition or someone being transgender as a big weird thing that breaks the rules - but she asks, is it really? She looks at the questions "how can she love a transman?" and "how can she dare to love again?"  Are we asking the right questions? Rowan believes there's a deeper question for all of us. And she shares exciting news about a...

Rowan and Devin answer the question, how did they dare to love again after divorce, coming out and the chaos of changing everything in their lives? How did they go from friends to lovers? This episode has a smart car, a dog walk, a full supermoon, a plan to take it slow, a slow motion walk across the room, an apology text at 6 a.m., what Devin describes as a "rocket ride" and what Rowan says was "...

A totally new definition of transgender! Devin dives in to what it means to him, and guess what? It's not a typical perspective! And he shakes things up with a new term: HTH - not FTM or MTF. Find out what that means in this episode. Rowan and Devin shaire their current "life" zip lines and feeling equal parts excited and anxious. They dish about flirting in their 50s and shoutout to Dan Levy and...

Rowan and Devin answer some frequent questions. Are they still lesbians? If Devin transitioned FTM does that mean they're in a straight relationship now? Why didn't Rowan just date men? Rowan challenges labels - love before labels baby! And she pushes the definition of what it means to say "a trans man is a man." Devin declares he was born fully loaded, and appointed, this way. And a super cute te...

What happens when the Transman and his Queen go to Vegas? Rowan and Devin discuss their recent trip to Las Vegas, including their experiences on the strip, at the Paris Hotel, and enjoying steak frites at Mon Ami Gabi restaurant. They both take on their fear of heights with a zip line challenge over Fremont Street. Devin reacts to feeling up close and personal with some gear checks and Rowan disco...

Rowan asks - Will you be sexually attracted to your partner after they transition? Can your intimacy survive? Labels, gender, identity, so many changes. How do we find our way? How do we connect and create honest intimacy and the relationship we long for? What if we could have the best sex of our life? Is that possible? "When you're with someone who is fully present in themselves, who's aligned an...

Rowan shares some of the fears and obstacles she faced when Devin came out to her. She talks about when she literally got kicked in the head and what it taught her that she used in her relationship. "Sometimes out of the blue, we get a life change that feels like a kick in the head."  Unexpected life changes and asks - what if the big scary thing is really a good thing? What if it leads us to some...

"How did you know you were trans and not a masc lesbian instead?"  In this episode Devin talks about the process of allowing their true self, their boy, to come forward, through clothes, growing hair in new places, and building muscle. Rowan shares her experience of living a masculine presentation before realizing that it wasn't right for her and what happened when she abruptly changed. They talk...

In this episode we have part 2 of Rowan's conversation with Cathy. (Part 1 is Ep5) Cathy is a 47 yr old wife and mother of two teenage sons whose partner transitioned, MTF, after 20 yrs of marriage. We get into so much good stuff in this conversation. We talk about how love is love, chosen family, and laughing through the changes. Also- Was Cathy angry at Brooke for coming out after 20 yrs of marr...

Super excited for you to hear my first guest on the show, Cathy from TransitionTogether.ca. Cathy is a 47 yr old wife and mother whose long time partner transtioned, MTF. I sat down with Cathy for a heartfelt and vulnerable conversation about her partner transitioning. She shares her experience with Brooke, their two teenage sons, and a surprising turn of events at work. We talk about coming out t...

Rowan talks about changing her name and why it mattered to her. How she ended up at a hotel front desk with no name and no address and what it was like telling her father, who chose her first name, that she was choosing her own name at 53 yrs. She talks about the Junos, Tegan and Sara, and unpexpected advocacy. And she launches her idea for a shirt that celebrates being trans. Hear all about the i...

In this episode we take a deep dive into something that Devin and I are passionate about - that more people love than hate. And there’s more to the conversation than reacting and focusing on hate or on what we don’t know about each other. Devin talks about how they can create a space for people to learn and to get to know each other.  They share about the beauty of the transgender experience and k...

Rowan and Devin talk about Devin’s transition at 57 and how that affected their relationship. They also talk about:   Going from high heels to cowboy boots What Rowan thought of Devin growing a beard Rowan’s brain fart hearing someone ask about her "husband" (my what?!!) How stories and representation impact Devin How a lesbian travel company helped Rowan come out at 50 If you’d like to help suppo...

Rowan answers the question - How can you love a transman? She shares her story of how she responded to Devin coming out as trans, FTM. This is a heartfelt story of change and of love. And also, monster trucks.  The transman and his Queen is a listener supported podcast. To support our work please consider signing up for  Patreon here , buy some fab merch here Also - you can support our work with t...