The Stay in the room Podcast

In this episode, we unpack the idea that your partner can be a mirror—reflecting the places you still feel tender, triggered, or unintegrated—and how an intimate relationship can become a powerful path for growth. We share a real, recent moment of “intense fellowship” where old patterns surfaced, projections got named, and we had to choose devotion to each other’s souls (not each other’s egos). If...

In this episode, we kick off season two with a jam-packed interview with Leigh-Anne LoPinto. Leigh-Anne’s work is devoted to the new paradigm of relationships. For the past 15 years, she has worked with people 1:1 and in groups to support healing and growth through relationships as a psychologist, breathwork teacher, and relationship advisor. She clearly sees, knows, and lives this path, understan...

Episode Summary In this episode, Jonathan interviews Heidi about her upcoming adventure—competing on Write or Flight , the first-ever reality TV show for memoir writers. Heidi shares how she was selected to join nine writers from around the world in Cusco, Peru, where they’ll live together, go on adventures, and compete in memoir-writing challenges. More than a competition, this journey is about r...

Episode Summary: In this special family episode, we’re joined by our daughter Faith to talk candidly about her experience living—and thriving—with dyslexia. Faith shares what it was like to be diagnosed later in childhood, how it shaped her relationship with learning, and the emotional journey of navigating a world that often misunderstands invisible disabilities. With honesty, humor, and insight...

Episode Summary This episode goes deep. We’re joined by longtime friend, pastor, and adoption advocate Randy Bohlender for a raw and timely conversation about spiritual abuse, leadership failures, and how to keep your faith intact after being wounded by the church. Randy brings both pastoral wisdom and personal reflection to the table as we talk about the difference between flawed leaders and dang...

  Episode Summary In this honest and reflective episode, Heidi shares the story behind one of her most impactful breakups—her slow, quiet, and deeply personal decision to walk away from alcohol. What began as a memoir-style Substack article turns into a vulnerable conversation about what it means to examine a culturally accepted habit that no longer aligns with your values, health, or intuition. H...

Episode Summary: In this raw and relatable episode, we explore the dynamics of codependence, independence, and interdependence in relationships. Drawing from their 20+ years of marriage and personal recovery work, Jonathan and Heidi Mills unpack how codependent behaviors often stem from trauma, family systems, and social conditioning—especially for women of faith. This conversation is full of insi...

Episode Summary: In this eye-opening episode, we dive into the complexities of neurodivergence with our guest, Rebecca Armstead. Rebecca shares her deeply personal journey of discovering her neurodivergence later in life and how it shaped her experiences, relationships, and career. We explore the impact of late diagnosis, the challenges of masking, and the importance of embracing one’s authentic s...

Episode Summary: What happens when prayer alone isn’t enough? Coming from a charismatic faith background, we were taught that prayer could fix everything. But through life, loss, and healing, we’ve realized that transformation often requires more. In this episode, we explore the tension between faith and action, share our struggles with spiritual bypassing, and navigate the messy middle of reconst...

Episode Summary: In this deeply personal episode, we finally share the story we’ve been alluding to over the past several episodes—our journey of recovery after betrayal. We open up about the hardest season of our marriage, the process we went through to heal, and what we learned along the way. This conversation isn’t about assigning blame or telling "our side" of the story; it’s about sharing the...

 Episode Summary For years, we lived in a mindset where every struggle, every emotion, every obstacle had an enemy behind it. If something went wrong, we had to pray harder, fight spiritual battles, and stay on high alert. But here’s what we’ve learned—living in constant warfare mode isn’t freedom. It’s fear. In this vulnerable episode, we dive into our personal experiences with deliverance minist...

Episode Summary For too long, the church has used forgiveness as a weapon —silencing victims, protecting abusers, and demanding reconciliation without accountability. And when it comes to God’s gender , why has the church clung so tightly to a masculine image? What’s at stake in how we see God? In this powerful episode, we sit down with Dr. Andrew Bauman , therapist, advocate, and author of Safe C...

 Episode Summary Ever heard phrases like, “Just pray about it,” or “Everything happens for a reason” when you’re struggling? While well-intended, this is often spiritual bypassing —using faith, positivity, or “higher thinking” to avoid dealing with real emotions. And here’s the problem: when we bypass pain, we also bypass healing. In this episode, we’re breaking down why spiritual bypassing is a p...

 Episode Summary Is “busy” your default answer to how you’re doing? In this episode, we tackle the pervasive mindset of hustle culture and the way society has turned busyness into a status symbol. Drawing from our own experiences, we share how we’ve deprogrammed from the constant grind and shifted toward a more intentional and balanced way of living. We explore the harmful narratives around produc...

What does it really mean to “stay in the room”? In this episode, we’re unpacking the heart behind the phrase and what it looks like in real life—and what it doesn’t. We share the values that guide us, like truth-telling, kindness, honor, and mutual commitment and dive into how we’ve learned to live those values in tough conversations. This episode is full of real talk, laughter, and honest reflect...

 Episode Summary: In this deeply personal follow-up to Episode 1, Heidi shares her side of the story—how pornography affected her life, her marriage, and her sense of self. Through raw and vulnerable reflections, Heidi dives into the emotional, relational, and mental toll pornography took on her and the journey she’s been on to reclaim her story. She unpacks the false beliefs she had to confront,...

 Episode Summary: In our debut episode, Heidi takes on the role of interviewer as Jonathan shares his deeply personal journey with pornography. Together, we dive into the real problem behind porn (hint: it’s not what you think) and unpack the road to recovery. Along the way, Jonathan shares the false beliefs he had to deconstruct, the emotional and relational impact, and the tools he’s found most...